Surprise Boots — An Act of Kindness

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I blogged about Justin Bent Rail Buckaroo boots on December 5, 2009, when I took a poll among blog visitors to determine which pair of boots to get next. The choices were blue Nocona ostrich cowboy boots or Justin “Bent Rail” buckaroo boots. The Justin boots didn’t win the poll. I like the boots, but I didn’t buy them and was debating about buying them at some time in the future.

When I arrived home on the afternoon of Monday, January 4, I saw a box at my doorstep. The Justin boots were inside it. The return address was the Justin Boot factory in Texas. There was nothing inside the box such as a note or packing list or anything that would tell me who sent the boots.

I asked my partner and my brother-in-heart, AZ, if either of them gave me the boots. They responded with almost the same words: “give you another pair of boots? Are you nuts? You have too many!”

I dunno. Is it possible to have too many boots?

I digress. I am deeply appreciative of the time and trouble that someone went through to get these boots for me, anonymously. What a terrific act of kindness! Acts of Kindness in any form — from sharing a smile, sending a card, giving a gift, or helping someone — brighten lives and let someone know he or she is appreciated, loved, and cared for.

I definitely will enjoy this wonderful pair of boots. I put them with a pair of Wrangler jeans, and then wore them to work with dress slacks. They feel and look great!

THANK YOU, OH ANONYMOUS ONE! (You know how to find me if you wish to reveal yourself in some way).

Thanks to my dear friend, Kevin, for helping me with this blog post! He always knows just what to say — especially on those very rare occasions when I am at a loss for words.

Life is short: enjoy those unexpected surprises!

Update: I am glad to see that our friends at Justin Brands, along with at least two of their marketing and PR/Advertising firms (Balcom and Nuvox) have found this post. I hope you have enjoyed it.

Internet Influenced Perceptions

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I continue to follow what people are searching and what brings them to this blog, or my personal “boot and leather” website. I remain intrigued.

What I am observing is that there is a lot of curiosity out there, and perhaps a bit of fear or confusion, especially among straight people.

When I was blogging in December of 2008 and 2009 about perceptions of Wesco Boots being “gay,” I delved into my web logs and statistics, and followed leads to posts on some blogs, YouTube, and websites such as hotboots.com. What I found was not surprising: the vast majority, if not 100%, of web-based postings about Wesco boots are by those who have a fetish interest in the boots. (I excluded vendors and the company’s website.)

I explored further. Postings about other kinds of boots, while not as numerous, are also made almost 100% by those with a gay fetish interest once vendors are excluded. For example, on 4 January, someone from Maine searched with the question “are ostrich boots gay?” and right before that, someone from Quebec searched, “cowboy jeans gay?” Seriously, I kid you not. This is an example of dozens of such questions I see every day that generate visits to this blog and my website.

Many people are searching the internet with questions like that, which they wouldn’t have the courage to ask a live human being or if they did ask someone, they would likely receive an affirming answer to a preconceived notion. (That is, they ask people who are like themselves, and who will tell them what they expect to hear.)

Straight people develop perceptions about certain kinds of boots and guys who wear them based a lot on what they are seeing from internet search engine results. Ahhhh! Run for the hills! The boots or jeans are gay!

It is not true that boots can be gay or that gay men choose certain boots or jeans to wear BUT the postings about boots on the internet (especially YouTube) usually are by a gay man (not a woman) and reflect some serious fetish-related interests.

There are a lot of postings on the Internet and on YouTube that combine gay fetish interests — leather, smoking, mild BDSM, stomping, boots, socks, feet, suits, etc. It is not surprising to me that straight people get confused and develop some pretty wild misunderstandings.

But there are very few straight people who post videos or write blogs about leather, boots, etc. (I have linked to two from this blog — Jennifer June’s Cowboy Boots blog, and the Engineer Boot blog, but there are not many others that I could find.)

My assertion remains: you won’t find many straight guys posting videos about their enjoyment of Wesco boots, engineer boots, or cowboy boots. Thus, if all you are seeing on YouTube (or elsewhere) on a non-vendor internet posting is by gay people, it is easy to jump to a conclusion and engage in “guilt by association” — if the poster of a video or website or blog is gay, then what they post about therefore must be “gay” as well. Quod Erat Demonstrandum or ὅπερ ἔδει δεῖξαι.

Interestingly, I have not found quite the same large correlation between gay fetish interests and leather gear. Sure, there are a lot of postings related to leather by gay men (and even a few women.) But there are also many postings by straight guys (particularly in the motorcycle forums) about leather gear. They are asking, “what is functional? What works? How much does it cost? What’s the value?” … all good questions.

I have noticed sometimes that in these forums in which the vast majority of participants are straight guys (including “hard core bikers”), some of them have used a search engine to explore their questions, and the results link to a lot of gay fetish stuff. Some of them post their “concerns” on the forums. I have commented about that behaviour in the past. Usually, such posts by straight guys reflect a generalization about gay people and leather gear. In order to make themselves sound more masculine and “not gay,” sometimes these insecure individuals say some very rude and/or imbecilic things. But just pity and pray them, for they know not what they say, as they do not realize how much the internet is affecting their perceptions.

Life is short: take time to understand the bigger picture. Don’t accept what you see prima facie — especially from Google searches!

Boot and Leather Videos

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A link from a recent post on Straight Acting’s blog to Jonah of Finland’s blog lists what Jonah describes as “Ten Don’ts of Leather Videos.”

Jonah has expressed his opinions, and for the most part, I tend to agree. However, the method by which he stated his comments: “don’t do this” and “don’t do that” takes a negative approach which is unhelpful to the amateur leather guy who produces the occasional amateur video for posting on YouTube for entertainment of fellow guys into leather (and boots and other fetishes.)

What I want to know is what are the “do’s” — not the don’ts — of leather (or boot) videos. It is easy to say what not to do, but not as easy to say what to do.

I have a lot of videos posted on YouTube now. Admittedly, I have created some videos which violate Jonah’s opinions of what he likes or doesn’t like. That’s okay — he doesn’t have to sit through something he doesn’t like. There are some videos that I have created by request of some men with whom I have interacted on the ‘net. I may not have created some of them unless I was asked. Okay, so be it. Done. The requester (and I) enjoyed. That’s enough.

The good thing about internet-based video is that you can view what you like and surf to other videos if what you are seeing does not please or interest you. There are a lot of videos which I started to view then stopped viewing and surfed on, because I have not liked it, the content frightened me, or was just badly done (fuzzy, blurry, and poorly edited). There are some things that I do not care to view, such a stomping stuff, or breaking things. I am not saying that those who create such videos are bad — I am saying that those videos do not interest me. That is okay — I am who I am. Those videos interest others. It’s a big world out there.

Same is true with blogs, as well. Read what you like, surf on if you do not like what you are reading. It’s a free world (except for China), as far as the internet goes. (Regretfully, the Government of China blocks access to blogs and videos posted on YouTube, along with a lot more.)

I do not like lists of “don’t do this” and “don’t do that.” Lists of what not to do are not helpful. What amateur video creators like me want to know is, “what do you want to see?” (within the G-rated limits of what is allowed by YouTube.) As Jonah says, “there are some men who have a hard time coming up with something to do [in the video…so they smoke].” Regardless if one enjoys a video with a guy in leather smoking or not, the point Jonah was making, with which I agree, is that it is very difficult to come up with something to do in a video that is both real and interesting to watch. Acting in a video if one is not an actor is not a good idea. Just rubbing boots or putting on gloves or twirling like a leather model also gets boring. Jonah says that, and I agree.

However, I want to point out that it is a bit hypocritical to offer comments of “what not to do” if one does not engage in producing his own videos. It is much easier to be a critic of others’ work than try to create a work himself. I give credit to Jonah, though, that he acknowledges that he is giving his own opinion “for an audience of one” and also that his is both a beggar and a chooser. Witty guy, he is. I appreciate his candor.

So what to do?

Remember, telling someone what to do is not the same thing as telling someone what not to do. For most people, it is easier to remember what to do (“walk down stairs in case of fire”) instead of what not to do (“don’t use the stairs in case of fire.” — if one is not to use the stairs, then they have to have their wits about them to figure out what to do instead. In an emergency, one may not always be able to think clearly, so they react, and sometimes do the wrong thing. I know this example is unrelated to leather fetish videos, but it gets my point across.)

I do not have much time to create videos, since my partner is not interested in helping me with them and I have to do them when I am at home alone, which is seldom since my partner rarely goes anywhere by himself. However, I am open to ideas for what to do in a video, what actions to show, or what demonstrations or discussions are of interest to others. I would much rather know what to do — not what not to do.

Send me a message or leave a comment on this blog. I will be happy to consider reasonable, appropriate, interesting input. Thanks.

Life is short: figure out what to do!

My Treasure

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This is my aunt, for whom I care and enable her to continue to live an independent life. January 2 marked her 95th birthday. She is doing quite well. I so treasure her as such a marvelous lady. Her physical health remains stable, though her brain function is slowly deteriorating. However, with the help of a good neurologist and GP, appropriate medications, as well as a helper who spends several hours with her on weekdays while I am working, my aunt functions well.

She is so happy. It is such a joy to be around someone who is always chipper, smiling, and pleasant. I know it is a bit rare for someone of that age not to be in worse physical shape, or have developed a bad temperament. Not the case with my lovely aunt. She may repeat stories, or change languages from English to Italian to French to Spanish (and back and forth) as we talk. But continuing to communicate so well is amazing to me.

My partner and I took her out to lunch yesterday, and had a very nice time. There were only about 70 members of our family present, so it was a small crowd. But a joyous and happy one. (Glad I snuck the Xanax into my partner’s juice at breakfast!) [Just kiddin’]

I wore leather jeans and a denim shirt, and boots of course. And, as usual… no one said a thing about what I was wearing.

I feel so blessed… what a treat it is to care for someone who is so special.

Life is short: show those you love that you love them.

New Year’s Hunk

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When I arrived at home from the New Year’s party that I attended, a sexy man was waiting for me, silhouetted by our Christmas tree. How would you react if you saw this man waiting for you?

Sproingggg!

My partner and I sure had fun with our own private welcome to 2010!

….in the morning, we slept until after 9am, which is completely unheard of in our household. Not being in a rush, we snuggled closely and talked about our goals, aspirations, thoughts, and ideas for the coming year. What a nice, gentle way to wake up on the first day of the new year.

The rest of New Year’s Day was more mundane. I passed on going on an annual polar bear motorcycle ride because there was lot of wet, salty crud on the roads that would spray up on my bike and make it an absolute mess and be hard to clean. Plus, we had a lot of other things to do. We finally “got in gear and going” by noon. I visited my sweet, lovely aunt; we did our weekly grocery shopping; and I did a major carpentry job to double the capacity of a closet so that some of my leather gear can have more room for air to circulate around it. We had a productive afternoon, albeit the day started much later than usual.

I had a nice telephone chat with my twin brother, who made it home safely to where he lives in Europe. I also spoke with my brother-in-heart, AZ, who called to wish a Happy New Year. What a sweet, thoughtful man.

Life is short: enjoy!

New Years Eve in Leather

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For the 24th year in a row, I went to my very close friend’s New Year’s eve party, where many of his family gather and ring in the year together. I help him prepare a big breakfast, which we eat about 11:30pm, then we watch the festivities on TV and loudly count down 10..9..8 … 3..2..1 until we all scream “Happy New Year!” We kiss and hug, have a glass of champagne (or in my case, ginger ale), and that’s about it. I usually leave about 12:15pm so I can come home to my partner, and continue our own private festivities.

As usual, I chose some leather to wear. In this case, my Naked Leather Jeans which even though they are unlined, are warm because they are made of thick, 8 to 10oz cowhide. The jeans feel great, and since I recently had the snap closure removed and a zipper installed instead, they fit better (and don’t come unsnapped when I sit down.) On top, I wore a red checked flannel shirt.

Whilst cooking, the host of the party (my close friend) and I don chef’s smocks. Then I occasionally chase him, his wife, or their kids around the kitchen like the Swedish Chef once did on The Muppet Show. (But not with a knife… I use a bottle of oregano, instead…long story about why that spice is chosen.)

Because my friend’s family rivals my own in size, the noise and number of children intimidate my partner, so he after going with me to this party once, he vowed never to return. I don’t consider the party to be too boisterous, but then again, I am accustomed to large groups, and can hold my own. My partner does not like all the noise, running around, and the size of the crowd. (To him, more than one other person is a crowd.) He stays home and watches stuff on TV that I don’t like (such as college football games), and waits for me to come home (and worries; though I don’t drink alcohol, that does not mean that there are not drunk drivers sharing the road with me).

This post was written before the actual New Year’s party, and was scheduled for posting on New Years Day when I will still be snuggled next to my partner in bed. Should he surprise me when I get home, like he did last year, I will post an update. (te he, giggle giggle.)

Life is short: Celebrate with those you love! HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Resolving

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As 2009 draws to a close, I reflect on the year and think about the coming year. Who I am, who I want to be, what I want to do, and how I will execute these goals. My personal goals are not quite “new years resolutions.” I don’t believe in making public statements that are not achievable, or not consistent with who I am.

I reviewed my “Resolving” post from last year, and I can say that I achieved most of what I said I would do. I will continue with more of the same:

  • Caring for my partner, family, and friends by lending a hand, giving a call and paying attention, and sending all those birthday cards. In 2009, I sent 200+ cards and anticipate the same in 2010.
  • Sharing a smile, even with people I don’t know. A smile may be the only good thing that happened to someone, so I resolve to continue to smile often in both a physical manner, as well as with my words.
  • Making lemonade when life serves you lemons. I had a rough year in part of my life, and I resolve to move forward, held held high, and accept and appreciate the support I get from those who care for me.
  • Trying to take time to have more fun, including riding my Harley with my club, and continuing to practice my Italian with my Bocci buddies, among other things. I wish I didn’t have to “schedule” fun, but if I didn’t work at carving out time to go ride, play Bocci, visit my family, and celebrate life, I would be bogged down with chores, work, and feel burdened. My burdens are lifted when I take time to enjoy, to smile, to laugh, to share, and to contribute to the welfare of my friends and neighbors.
  • Continue to love and care for the man who means the world to me, who accepts me for who I am, with all of my faults, foibles, and klutziness. My beloved partner deserves nothing but my TLC, as he returns his to me.
  • Continuing with my community service, and supporting good people to run for office in our local elections, stepping down from my own. It’s time for me to take a break!
  • Show those that I love that I love them, each and every day.

Anything I didn’t do that I said I would in 2009?

Yep: I didn’t build that gazebo in the back yard. Gazebo-building took a back seat to reflooring our upstairs hallway with hardwood. Man, that took a LONG time.

Anything new for 2010?

I didn’t say this last year, but I should have: I will continue to follow the example set for me by my best friend, AZ, as well as thoughtful and caring friends with whom I exchange email regularly (in alpha order) Bama, Brian, Clay, Derrell, Eugene, Kelly, Kevin, Paul, Sue, … and more. I hate naming names because inevitably I’ll forget someone. If I have, please pardon me!) These people are wonderful, thoughtful, insightful, caring human beings who mean a lot to me. The example they set by what they do and how to they do it is one that I will continue to try to follow.

More new things for 2010? Well, some new leathers are making their way into my motorcycle gear. I’ll share about growing and changing focus from fetish to function as I continue my journey in life. New boots? Well… probably. I have my eye on some boots that I don’t have and would like to have, so when my boot fund is adequately financed, I’ll make the move. Declutter? My partner is King of “getting rid of stuff” and I may just help out. Oh, and I’ll try to relax and just chill out; kick my boots up in the hammock and watch the world of the animal antics in our back yard park. Just sittin’ and chillin’ is very hard for me to do, due to what my twin brother calls my obsession with acting like “Taz” in the Looney Tunes cartoons. (giggle) It’s really my Type A personality.

I would love to take a long, long ride on my Harley with people who want to stop and smell the roses. About 200 – 400 miles per day is do-able. More than that, I just get too tired and it’s no longer fun to ride. I hope I can find some buddies who want to take a road trip with me for a week or two, perhaps north to the Canadian Maritimes. That has been a long-term desire. Having ridden a Harley in Europe, Australia, and New Zealand, I know what such a trip can be like. I wish my partner could join me, but due to his disability, he can’t. But now that I own a touring class Harley, it’s time to take such a trip on my own bike, if only I could find a few people who don’t want to ride long 15-hour days and drink all night.

Are there places to which I would like to travel? You bet! But travel beyond the US or Canada is not in the financial picture for me due to the devalued US Dollar. I just can’t afford it. Within the U.S., I would love to return to visit my old stomping grounds in Los Angeles, my favourite City By The Bay (San Francisco), or rent a bike and go riding through Zion National Park. Better yet, have my buddy Clay take me to the Calgary Stampede with all those cowboys! Woof!

Overall, I resolve to continue my life’s journey by sharing joy, loving life, extending a helping hand, supporting my lovely aunt through her 95th year, caring for my partner, doing a good job at work, having some fun, but most of all, taking action. It’s one thing to talk about it. It’s quite something else to do it. That’s my goal: do it, and with a huge smile on my face. (And in boots and leather, too!)

May you have a wonderful 2010. Happy New Year!

Top 10 Countdown: 1 – 5

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Reviewing my stats on which of my posts throughout the whole year are most viewed, the following are the most popular posts on my blog for 2009:

#4: (tie) Cowboy Boots and Jeans Google Searches

It is amusing to me that many people use the Google search engine to ask serious questions about ordinary issues, such as wearing cowboy boots or about leather in public. This blog post gets more “hits” than many others because its keywords about using the Google search engine result in many viewers using Google to land here.

#4: (tie) Where Do You Find Masculine Gay Guys?

This is post on my blog related to masculine gay men gets about 100 visitors each week. Lots of people are interested in finding out how and where to meet a masculine gay man. There are a lot of us (masculine gay men) out here, but perhaps we’re not where you’ve been looking (or in my case, “taken”).

#3: Best Motorcycle Boots

Many people search the internet for “Best Motorcycle Boots” and my blog post comes up hundreds of times each week. There are a lot of people looking for recommendations and reviews of motorcycle boots and end up frequently on this blog post. I have composed a very popular review of motorcycle boots on my website.

#2: Bulges and Breeches

I think this blog post is viewed very often because I featured a popular Tom of Finland drawing within it, as part of a review. Using the Google image search feature, this image on my blog comes up very often.

#1: Wesco Boots and Gay Culture

While this blog post first appeared on December 27, 2008, it absolutely amazes me how many hundreds of visitors find it each week. There is a lot of mystery and interest in Wesco Boots and Gay Culture. I have reached the conclusion that much of the confusion by the straight community comes from fetish videos they see on YouTube. I posted an update about this “interest” on December 11, 2009.

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While not the most highly rated, my blog post titled, “Not A Practicing Homosexual” was separately nominated for the funniest of the year.

Thank you for visiting this blog!

Top 10 Countdown: 6 – 10

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It has been interesting blogging for my second year, with posts appearing every day about various things in my life and about my interests in boots, leather, motorcycling, and caring for people.

I keep stats on which of my posts throughout the whole year are most viewed. The posts come up — even the older ones — from Google searches, mostly, since Google owns Blogger, which is where this blog is hosted.

So here goes …. the following are the most popular posts on my blog this year:

#10: (tie) Best Value Motorcycle Boots

Lots of people search for information and end up on my website and this blog while looking for insights on the best value for [quality] motorcycle boots. This post was written in response to seeing all of those searches end up on my website.

#10: (tie) Leather Repair and Alteration

This post was written in response to a number of email messages that I have received this year.

#9: Rules for Cowboy Boots

It never ceases to amaze me how many people use the Internet to search for the mystical “rules” for wearing cowboy boots. Here they are.

#8: Rules for Wearing Fetish Uniforms

Searching for “rules” about whether it is legal to wear a uniform if you are not a law enforcement officer results in many hits on this blog and my website. Here are “the rules” for those who have a uniform fetish.

#7: The Masculine Gay Man

As I said in the opening of that post, a LOT of people use search engines to look up information about gay men and masculinity. This is one of the two most popular posts on this blog that gives my opinions on the matter.

#6: Wesco Boots — Gay?

An attempted blog comment on a previous (and still very popular) blog post resulted in my developing another post about Wesco boots and gay culture. It seems that YouTube videos about Wesco boots by gay guys has caused misperceptions by some straight guys.

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Check back for my next post tomorrow when I reveal #1 – #5!

Some "Me Time"

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Christmas is over. My partner is taking my mother-in-law home today. It still isn’t easy to live with her. Oh well, she’s the only mother that my partner has, so by extension, I try to be as kind and gentle with her as I can. I admit, it isn’t easy. I will be happy not to have to watch another sappy Christmas movie that my partner recorded to keep her entertained during her visit.

My twin brother and his wife will be here through Wednesday, but in order to see more of the family who live much further away from me, he and his wife also are leaving this morning and will stay a few days with our sister before going back to Europe. Gosh, I’ll miss him. It has been a lot of fun having him around.

Now through Thursday when my partner returns, I have some “me time.” I am off work this entire week… whoopie!

This extended free time is rare, but appreciated time to do things that I want to do: read, update my website and see if I can create a special feature for it, play a little bit (and perhaps do a video or two), replace leaky valves in three faucets in our house and two in a couple rental houses I own, get the truck inspected, cross over to Virginia to pick up some things that are half-price over there than where I live, etc., etc.

And, of course, I will be writing some more blog posts for future viewing.

Please keep the ideas coming. Questions, thoughts, concerns, suggestions — all are welcome. Questions and suggestions that I receive via email sometimes turn into good stuff for a post on this blog. Please be assured that I will not reveal the name of anyone who communicates with me (unless the person says that it is okay to do so.) Viewing habits on my website, usually driven by search engines, also have been good fodder for sharing some musings. So keep searching — it’s interesting to “see” what people want to know.

To communicate with me, it is easiest to write to me. You may also leave a comment on this (or any other) blog post that is consistent with the anonymous commenting policy.

Okay, now to enjoy some “me time.” This blog will be on “auto-blog” status through January 1.

Life is short: enjoy it!