Monthly Archives: April 2010

The Lonely Sunrise

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Sunrise is my absolute favourite time of each weekend morning. Some may think that I’m crazy, awakening as the sun comes up, especially each day a few minutes earlier as we approach the summer solstice. Nonetheless, I have always been an early-bird.

I have often written about weekend sunrise time. That’s when I will softly snuggle close to my partner, lay my head on his chest, and click the remote to open the blinds and draw the shades so the floor-to-ceiling windows in our bedroom reveal the glorious trees in the forest just outside. It truly is a magnificent, dramatic sight. Because I built our house, I designed and built our rear bedroom wall entirely of glass so our view would not be blocked by gypsum or wires.

Watching the squirrels jump from branch to branch, and scurry up and down the trees is delightful. How much energy they have! We love watching them play “catch me if you can.”

The green leaves are randomly jeweled by the bright red feathers of cardinals, orange-and-black feathers of Baltimore orioles and redwings, and even the occasional blue, green, or yellow finches. The birds add a special sparkle not only with the colors, but also with their songs of joy and merriment. Heck, I even enjoy the sparrows and wrens. What they lack in color, they make up for in song. “Hmmmmmm” Can you hear that? It’s our friendly humming birds stopping by the nectar feeder. Amazing how they can hover in mid-air.

The diversity of the trees (14 different species) adds to subtle differences in shades of the leaves and their bark. Especially as the sun rises and grows from a hint of orange to brilliant yellow to bright white.

Ahhh… sunrise. How much I enjoy viewing the brightening of a new day. New hope. New horizons to conquer. New things to do. To live, to love, to share.

Alas, I am alone this weekend, as my partner is away visiting his mother. I still watched the sun rise on our forest before getting out of bed this morning. I have to admit, though, it wasn’t the same. There is something special about holding the one you love as the day renews.

Life is short: Enjoy the sun, enjoy the day, love life.

Winter to Summer

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My goodness, almost exactly two months ago, I was writing about being blasted by multiple winter storms that relentlessly pounded our area with huge amounts of snow and strong winds. I was confined at home with only a splint on my broken leg, scooting around on my butt when I had to move. It was frigidly cold, gray, and awful-looking outside.

How things have changed so quickly! For the last week, we have had record-breaking heat. Temperatures in the 80s and 90s (27 – 32C) and bright sunshine. Tree branches that were gray and looked lifeless last week are now leafing out quickly. Pollen from trees, grass, and flowers has skyrocketed. TG I’m not terribly affected by seasonal allergies. I am walking, albeit slowly, on my own two feet! Woo-hoo!

Once again, as is typical of the DC area, we have gone from Winter to Summer, with nary a hint of Spring in between. The calendar may say Spring, but the heat, humidity, and sunshine say different. Sure, we will get a storm that will cool things off, and we may even get a few more days of cold-and-dreary, but for the most part, Spring has fully sprung into Summer and we’re out and about, on our Harleys, and havin’ fun!

… thus is my continued optimism, as I still can’t ride my beloved bike just yet, but soon enough… I’ll be booted and on the saddle of my trusty iron horse once again. Meanwhile, I am enjoying the warmth. I also am enjoying seeing my solar array at home producing more power than we’re using, so my electric bill is a negative number. I always like that!

Warm regards!

Tell Me A Story

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You know the old saying, “tell me a story and I’ll tell you no lies.” Well, you know how that goes.

For my first major foray back into my community life, I chaired a meeting last night with a civic group. There are three factions within the group, each of whom have various reasons for being so passionate about their position. I like passion: it demonstrates that the person is seriously concerned and it is not a petty matter to them.

However, I also get highly irritated when people lie, and pretend they aren’t. They give you this look like, “believe me, I am telling the truth,” but all other mannerisms give them away — the darting eyes, fidgety hand movements, and stammering speech.

You’d figure if any profession can tell a good story and make it sound believable, it would be a lawyer. But last night, I caught a lawyer in a series — not just one but several — outright fibs. He claimed certain details as fact, when there was no proof. He cited figures that sounded implausible, and another person speaking after him proved that the lawyer could write the next edition of How To Lie With Statistics. What blew it was that he cited research from someone who I know personally. I know my colleague’s work. My colleague wouldn’t have said that. To prove it, I called my colleague right then-and-there and put him on speaker phone. The lawyer turned white as a sheet.

I wasn’t born yesterday. I can just tell when someone is trying to twist the truth to make something come out in their favor. Their problem was that they do not realize that I’ve been around the block once or twice, and know a few people. The look on that guy’s face when I called the author of the paper from which he was quoting — and the fact that I had the author’s phone number in my cell phone’s directory — was exceptionally amusing.

Look, if you are going to make a statement in public, certainly back it up with facts and figures. But also make sure that those facts are supported and can be verified independently. Otherwise, it will catch up with you and could work against you.

Lyin’ eyes and darting gestures will also always give you away.

Life is short: speak honestly (and stop flailing your hands!)

Women Bikers

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I enjoy riding my Harley, and I enjoy riding with other people. It is fun to share experiences and the open road with a group. I particularly enjoy riding with the group with which I ride now, which is composed of men and women who share the same goal: “ride and have fun.”

There are a number of women bikers in this group. I see more and more women riders each year. I think that’s great! Certainly the “motor company” (Harley-Davidson) has observed that women riders are a large and growing market. They are much more attentive to the needs of women riders nowadays than years gone by where they pretty much made “one-size fits all men” motorcycles.

I share the joy with my friend Sue who lives in Australia. She rode a motorcycle when she lived in the U.S., and when she moved back to her home country, she set a goal to get herself a Harley. She just bought herself a beauty — a 2010 Dyna Street Bob! I envy her, in a way, being able to ride those lovely roadways Down Under. I shan’t forget my experience riding a (rented) Harley along The Great Ocean Road from Melbourne to Adelaide. Wow, that was an experience!

I also share joy with a former next-door neighbor who knew me when I was born. She actually was my sister’s childhood best friend. As we’ve moved around, aged, and such, we sorta lost touch. But my sister found her on Facebook, and a couple years ago when my sister was visiting, the two of them (her old friend and my sister) came over to our house to transfer some old reel-to-reel tapes onto cassette so they could hear themselves as children. Their laughter filled our house, and my heart.

My sister’s friend is a biker. Like my friend Sue, she had set her goal to get herself a Harley this year. She enjoyed riding her smaller, Japanese bike, but she wanted to move up to a Harley. She bought a 2008 Fat Boy, and took delivery last week. She has been riding and sharing her joy with me and others. I can’t wait to go riding with her as soon as my doc says that I can.

The enthusiasm, the fun, the joy — all of it — is wonderful for me to observe, and to participate (when I can.)

Now, we’ll have to work with those boot manufacturers to get my women biker friends some decent biker boots. But one step at a time: ride and have fun! Share your joy! Show your enthusiasm! You go, girls! Grrrrrrrrrr!

Bloggetory

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These are just some rambling remarks that add up to today’s bloggetory…

* Sunny, bright, warm days yet not being able to ride my Harley yet makes for a frustrated biker, itchin’ to get out! Livin’ with Mother Hubbard who holds me back is such a delight… (smile). He does love me.

* I am getting better each day after breaking my leg. The swelling of my right ankle continues, but is noticeably less. The ankle and foot flexes more, especially when I go swimming, and doesn’t hurt. Yea! I AM recovering!

* Swimming is helping not only with the ankle/leg recovery, but also with my weight. I have lost six pounds since the day the cast came off. These are “real” pounds, and not just “water weight” ounces. I’ll keep this exercise regimen going, and add brisk walking to it. I know I need the exercise. Walking and swimming both help me feel better. (I’ve never be the gym rat, so at least I have found some exercises that work for me and that I enjoy.)

* I mowed the lawn! Well, half of it anyway. It is amazing how something as simple as lawn-mowing can make someone happy! But it impressed upon me that I really am getting better. Soon enough, I’ll be able to tackle those hills (our side yards).

* I am sick and tired of wearing combat boots! Okay, they provide excellent support of my right leg and ankle, and because they lace up, the right boot can accommodate a little swelling and yet still close. I just don’t think that combat boots are good to wear all day (at work) and as I go about resuming my life. But … well … they ARE boots, and that’s what I wear!

* I still remember Rick, my riding buddy and community collaborator, who was killed by a cell-phone yapping SUV-driving yuppie seven years ago today. I truly regret that my state’s legislature remains spineless and will not pass a bill that restricts the use of hand-held wireless devices while operating a three-ton killing machine.

* Senior Safety Saturday is comin’ up fast! Woo-hoo! We’ve got a lot to tackle but we’re all ready for it! Can’t wait! Heck, I just might get myself out from behind the registration table and drill a hole or two to install a grab-bar, install a light or three… we’ll see.

* first of four county budget battle meetings have begun this week. Tonight will be my first “foray” back into my community role since I broke my leg. I am not testifying tonight … just observing … and gaining fodder for future conversations. But again, despite the tedious and tense nature of the content of the meeting, the fact is that I can go!

* I am enjoying the “little things” — accomplishments that were taken for granted before my leg broke. For example, I drove myself to pick up my aunt to bring her to our house for Easter dinner. I actually prepared Easter dinner myself, with no help! I went out to our forest and picked a bunch of flowers to decorate the table. I brought some more to a neighbor who is not feeling well. I was able to go fetch the newspaper from the drive. All these “little” things add up, and add much to my psyche-of-renewal.

Life is short: enjoy all of it, even the little things!

Wesco Disappointment

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The company that makes Wesco Boots has fairly recently come out with a variety of “new” colors and finishes of leather. In addition to traditional black, brown, and redwood, you can now order boots in “burlap” (tan), burgundy, and red, as well as with the roughout side of the hide facing outward.

Wow… how “interesting.” I have seen some guys display new Wesco boots in different colors and thought most of them looked nice. (Personally, I am not fond of red leather on Wesco boots, but that’s my opinion.)

For an ultimate last purchase of custom Wesco boots for my own collection, I worked with Mike to craft a truly unique pair of harness boots. Burgundy roughout leather foot and vamp, brown harness straps, and brown roughout shafts. I placed the order in January and began the countdown on the usual long wait to get them.

The boots arrived at my door last Thursday. I was rather surprised, because usually they send an email saying the boots were shipped, but this time they didn’t. Regardless, I was thrilled! There’s nothing like the feeling a Bootman has when he sees that big Wesco box on his doorstep!

I brought the box inside and eagerly opened it. The colors of the leather were fantastic. The 18″ height, buckskin leather lining, and thick Vibram 100R lug soles rendered quite a masculine & commanding appearance. Of course, the quality of construction was superb. But I could tell when I looked at my new boots that the shafts were narrow. Wesco has my custom sizing form on file, and for this particular pair, I had even specified the calf circumference to be one half inch wider than the measurements on my form. But they just didn’t look right.

I sat down and took off the boot I had on my left foot and tried to pull on the new left boot. Damn… waaaay too tight. No way could I pull it on. I didn’t try to pull harder. I knew that Wesco screwed up and the boots weren’t made right. Damn! I have to return the boots to be fixed and resized.

Look at the photo: the new boot is on the right, standing next to an older pair of brown Wesco harness boots on the left. You can tell simply at a glance that the calf circumference is much smaller than the older boot which was made to the same custom measurements that I had on file with Wesco.

I have heard some stories lately that Wesco has been messing up a lot of custom orders. Unfortunately, I found that out for myself. The boots have been returned. I hope they get it right this time. (I resent that the guy from Wesco told Mike in an email that he thinks my measurements have changed and they didn’t make a mistake. He will find out that they were made wrong the minute he looks at the boots. I know my boots and do not register this complaint lightly, nor am I trying to get Wesco to resize my boots for free due to my own error in judgment.)

I’m not too upset about this situation, though. Because my right leg is still healing and my ankle still swells a lot, I cannot wear those new boots on both feet right now if I wanted to. I can’t wear tall boots yet. The doc says that the ankle swelling will remain a part of my life for several months. By the time the swelling resolves, it will be typical Washington hot-as-blazes summer. That’s not a time that I can wear tall, leather-lined Wesco boots.

For now, the delay caused by having to have the boots returned, fixed, and sent back to me is okay. As I have said before, I am a very patient man. I wish the situation were different in that my right ankle was normal and the boots were sized correctly in the first place, but that ain’t the case. I’ll wait. Sometime months from now, I’ll feature those new boots here and on my website.

Good things come to those who wait… and wait… and wait. But what a horrible April Fools prank. It was no joke!

Life is short: wear your boots!

Hoppy Easter

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The memory card in my camera sizzled, so none of the photos that were taken with it yesterday were readable by my computer. Here is one photo that shows yesterday’s get-up. The photo was taken by the daughter of some of my friends. I’m the one in the middle. Enjoy! Happy Easter!

Why Not Be A Passenger?

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I was conversing with a close [straight] friend who lives in a distant state the other day, saying that I was longing to get back on the saddle of a motorcycle. I am unhappy because the weather is gorgeous and yet my Harley remains in the garage, unused, because my doc says I can’t ride yet until my leg heals some more after I broke it in January.

My friend asked, “why not ride as a passenger?”

It was a simple-enough question. If I can’t put my feet down and man-handle a big motorcycle, I could, at least, ride as a passenger, right?

Well… no, I don’t think so.

My partner does not know how to ride a motorcycle, so he couldn’t take me. My very close biker buddy friend who wouldn’t bat an eye taking me as his passenger was killed six years ago by a cell phone yapping SUV-driving yuppie. And, unfortunately, I do not have any other friends to whom I am close enough and who can ride a motorcycle to ask.

Sure, I belong to a motorcycle riding club and often ride with them on group rides. Unfortunately, I observe that most of these guys, if not all, are wary of me. I am the only “fully out” gay guy among them. (I figure if statistics are accurate, there are other gay men in the club, but if there are, they live completely in the closet.) The club members are friendly enough, but keep their distance socially. I think they’re afraid of “gay by association” if they get too close.

I have to admit, I keep my distance, too, mostly because I’m not the social animal that other, younger, single guys are. And the guys who aren’t single and who are sociable always bring their wives to social occasions (many of whom are riders themselves.) My partner is so anti-social that he rarely comes to me to any biker-related social events, so it is easy to perceive that I am not all that sociable. And, as I have said before, I don’t like to stay up late and drink beer. Thus, I avoid most biker social events because the hours and activities are incompatible with my preferences. I can understand, then, why there are distances in our relationships, and the distances aren’t all related to the fact that I am a gay man.

Regardless, when my friend asked me simply about whether I could ride as someone’s passenger, I thought, “nope, ain’t gonna happen.” I really don’t know anyone (or think I know anyone) who is man enough, secure enough, and courageous enough to take me as his passenger.

I also have to admit that being a motorcycle operator for some 33 years, it would be darned hard to be a passenger. I think I would naturally try to drive, or to put my foot down, to lean, or otherwise make things unintentionally difficult for the operator.

I commended my (straight) friend for being such an open-minded guy. He is not naive, but since he is not gay, he does not have much of an idea of what I live with. Homophobia comes in a variety of forms. Most of it is not overt. But it shows, for example, as people consider how close to get to me — or how not.

Life is short: dream of the day when things like this don’t matter.

Hobbling Hoppy Easter!

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Today I have modified my plans. Usually on the Saturday before Easter, I put small packages of Easter treats (sugar-free Peeps, jelly beans, and chocolate eggs) into my Harley’s TourPak, then while dressed in a full bunny costume, ride around the senior’s community near me and deliver one of these packages to special senior pals. This has become somewhat of a holiday tradition, and even was featured in The Washington Post a few years ago. It’s a hoot! It brightens the spirits of my friends and is so much fun to do.

Well, unfortunately, I can’t ride my beloved Harley yet. My doctor told me not to think about riding until at least mid-April. At first I argued, but now I realize that he was right. My leg still hurts a lot and the ankle is still swollen. But it WILL get better! I just have to give it some more time.

But this darned leg isn’t going to stop me from brightening the day of my senior pals or stop me from my tradition! I’m just changing it a little bit. My partner ordinarily goes to visit his Mom for Easter, but because he is still worried about me, is staying home this year. He will drive me in my truck. I can and will wear that bunny costume! I will become the “hobbling hoppy Easter bunny!”

Watch out! There’s a cwazy wabbit wunning awound wilver wing! Bwa ha ha!

Woo-hoo! Life is short: show those you love that you love them! Happy Easter, Pasqua, or whatever!

You’re Too Damn Happy

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I received an email the other day from someone who said this: “You’re Too Damn Happy.” He went on to say, “all this stuff about your partner and how all these old people took care of you. Bullshit.”

And that’s all he said.

Hey, fella, the reason why I didn’t reply to your rant via email is that there really isn’t anything I could say. It is obvious to me that you’re hurting. I truly am sorry about your plight and mental state that drove you to write to me and say what you said.

Is my life perfect? No. I’ve got a lot of things going on that I choose not to blog about. Seriously, people don’t want to read about the bad stuff. I have read blogs by others who have complained about life serving them lemons, and usually it comes across badly. It sounds like whining and ranting, which nobody wants to read. There are a few exceptional people who can make a rant sound funny. I mean belly-laugh funny. Unfortunately, I don’t have the skills to write humorously. So I usually choose not to rant, whine, or whimper about things that suck. (Though I might have sounded a bit whiney as I was dealing with my broken leg.)

There is so much tension in the world, lately driven by tea-bagging morons, but before that, driven by the economy, politics, or other matters — it would be easy to get sucked into an uncivil demeanor and to wallow in negativity.

I deliberately choose the opposite. Perhaps it comes from my upbringing, when my parents taught us to look ahead and to look forward. Perhaps it comes from being secure and self-confident. Yeah, some bad things are goin’ on in my world, but I can handle it. I can, because — yep, here I go again — of that ‘net that I have supporting me. Heck, even from Australia, my friend Sue commented the other day about the sunny outlook that I have, and that I have inspired her to smile as she walks along the beaches of the sunny coasts of Australia, a place that I have truly enjoyed visiting.

You see, we’re all in this world together. The physical world in my home and community, and the larger world of people with whom we engage via the ‘net. Through the power of positive outreach and support, I firmly believe that we can make the world a better place — one step at a time.

‘K, I’ll take it: I’m too “damn happy.” Heck, I’d rather be “damn happy” than “sucky sad.” Smile and get a life, buddy.

Life is short: smile. Make them wonder why.

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