Yearly Archives: 2010

Typical Saturday

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Yesterday was a typical Saturday for me. Here’s the run-down:

Stayed in bed way past our usual time to rise. While we both awoke at our usual 5-ish, I snuggled longer with my honey ’cause it was so friggin’ cold out. We just felt cold and didn’t want to get out of bed. Finally crawled out of bed at 6:30. What’s the world coming to?

Pulled on my naked leather jeans, flannel shirt, and Chippewa Firefighter boots. Got the daily paper from the drive and began scanning it. My partner pulled out the coupon sections and began cutting away. He’s a whiz when it comes to matching cents-off coupons with weekly specials so we save more on groceries we buy.

Prepared breakfast of home-made waffles, bacon, and OJ for me; added grapefruit and fruit juice for my partner. Quickly mixed a bundt cake to deliver later and got it in the oven. Signed 10 birthday cards for senior buds and two family members whose birthdays are coming up this next week. (The cards were already pre-addressed and stamped. It takes me a full day, but I prepare about 200 cards a year in advance and put them in a weekly organizer.)

By 8, I got on-line, paid some bills, caught up on email, updated a website for a political candidate who I am supporting, and reviewed some preliminary development plans for a project on which I am testifying in the coming week. My partner changed the linens and started doing laundry. Our division of labor: he does the laundry and I do the cooking.

At 10, I drove to the nearby retirement community to check on my aunt and some other senior friends. Delivered the cake to one of them. She has been feeling especially lonely since her family moved away. Paid my aunt’s bills, including her quarterly estimated taxes. Replaced a faulty light switch for one of my friends, and reset the remote on a TV for another. Got the quarterly tax payments for five others prepared and ready to mail. Visited and shared with these cherished members of my senior crew.

At noon, I went back home and picked up my partner for the joyful experience of weekly grocery shopping (smile). Had a short chat with a couple of constituents at the store. Came home, put stuff away, and then my partner and I went to a fixer-upper foreclosure house that I bought earlier this week to review what cleanup was required and start organizing our “attack plan” for required renovations.

By 3pm, we returned home. I got the mail and recycled about three trees. I began to do some batch cooking. I like to prepare tomato sauce, soups, stew, and pasta when I have some time. These things keep well refrigerated or frozen, so when I have less time during the week in the window between arriving home and rushing off to an evening meeting, we can still enjoy a home-cooked meal.

I spoke with some siblings and checked on some of my senior crew by phone throughout the pasta-making time. My partner is accustomed to my multi-tasking. You can’t see him in the photo, but he is right with me helping me make the ravioli.

At 6pm, as usual, we had dinner. TV and phone turned off. We always enjoy an uninterrupted evening meal. I prepared a light salad with crab, which we enjoyed with some bread — did I say I made that, too? Yeah, I bake a loaf of bread once or twice a week. Much healthier and less expensive that way.

After dinner, my partner and I jarred the sauce, stew, and washed the pots and pans, dried them, and put them away.

By 7:30pm, I was pooped. We retired to our basement. My partner turned on his usual blather recorded on Tivo, while I caught up more on the computer. I have to give a eulogy on Sunday for my first mentor who died on Christmas Eve, and worked quite a bit on preparing for that.

At 9pm, I printed out the eulogy I had written and read it to my partner aloud. He gave me some pointers, which I sat down and incorporated. By 9:30, we were in bed. I have a big day — an emotional one — on Sunday.

So that’s a rather typical Saturday for us. Hope you enjoyed the “tour.”

Life is short: wear boots and leather while enjoying it!

Going Grey

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I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: leather doesn’t always have to be black.

I received my delayed Christmas present from my partner: a short-sleeved grey leather shirt. It has black leather accents and white piping. It’s gorgeous! The top grain leather from which it is made is in the 9-10oz range, so it is thick and warm, but soft and flexible. Man, this is about the highest quality leather garment I have ever owned.

It was made custom for me by 665 Leather of North Hollywood, California. They were having this “Black Friday sale”… and, ahem, hints were given and my beloved partner, the excellent listener, responded.

It goes very well with my custom grey chaps and underchaps that I had made by Northbound Leather of Toronto, Canada, in 2004. The outfit is a bit “out there in leatherland” so I don’t think I will wear it as I go about my community business. But I will wear it when I ride my Harley… some day… when this darned cold snap abates and the snow and ice all goes away. Some day….

Grrrrr! More pics of this shirt are on my website.

Life is short: wear your leather!

Vanilla Leatherman

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In the gay world, the term “vanilla” means:

“… expression for conventional sex without any kinky extras such as bondage or sado-masochism.” (source).

I have been “into leather” for decades, and some may call me an “Old Guard Leatherman.” I regularly wear a Muir Cap (traditional “old guard” regalia), as well as full leather and tall boots. (note — when I say “regularly,” I mean “often” — not just to once-a-year events like MAL or IML or a MC club’s “run.”) Heck, sometimes I even mix it up with other things, like a flannel shirt with brown leather jeans, or a black leather shirt with blue denim jeans.

Why do I wear leather gear regularly? I like how it protects me when I ride my Harley, how it keeps me warm, and how it feels on my body. It is comfortable, practical, and exceptionally long-lasting. Since I wear leather a lot in my off-time, I do not buy jeans or other casual clothes nearly as much as other guys do — simply because I don’t have to, as my regular clothes have much less wear and do not need to be replaced as often.

I surf the ‘net and read a lot about gay guys who enjoy leather and sexual activities that they do while wearing leather. My perceptions may be grossly affected by what I am reading on the Internet, as I blogged about on Tuesday.

It caused me to think, “is there such a thing as being ‘too vanilla’ for leather?” I do not like bondage, but have no ill-will toward those who do. I never have nor would engage in S&M sexual activities. My reasons for this aversion go back to a previous job where I once rescued bound victims of actual human torture. The memories continue to haunt me, and thus anything related to bondage and/or S&M become as much “unstimulating” to me as they may stimulate others.

Are there “rules” that gay men who wear leather must also like to engage in kinky sex that involves bondage or S&M? Are there leathercops who will confiscate my leather gear because I do not engage in “more active” leathersex that most would define as “kinky”?

Harumppph…. the closest I get to kinky sex is wearing boots, chaps, and a vest when I play with my partner. This is a “G-rated” blog, so I will not describe our sexual activity (and it’s none of your business, anyway). Let me suffice it to say that what we do is rather vanilla. That is how we enjoy it. Since we are monogamous and we both are tops, we do what pleases the other, and get sexual and personal satisfaction pleasing our mate.

But I digress… is it a contradiction in terms to say “vanilla leatherman?” In my case, I do not think so. I venture to say that I think that the vast majority of gay guys who like to wear leather do not engage in kinky leathersex. But the perceptions are that most guys into leather do engage in active, kinky sex. These perceptions are driven by what people read and view today on the Internet, and yesterday in porn mags and videos.

I wonder what others may think.

Life is short: wear your leather!

Surprise Boots — An Act of Kindness

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I blogged about Justin Bent Rail Buckaroo boots on December 5, 2009, when I took a poll among blog visitors to determine which pair of boots to get next. The choices were blue Nocona ostrich cowboy boots or Justin “Bent Rail” buckaroo boots. The Justin boots didn’t win the poll. I like the boots, but I didn’t buy them and was debating about buying them at some time in the future.

When I arrived home on the afternoon of Monday, January 4, I saw a box at my doorstep. The Justin boots were inside it. The return address was the Justin Boot factory in Texas. There was nothing inside the box such as a note or packing list or anything that would tell me who sent the boots.

I asked my partner and my brother-in-heart, AZ, if either of them gave me the boots. They responded with almost the same words: “give you another pair of boots? Are you nuts? You have too many!”

I dunno. Is it possible to have too many boots?

I digress. I am deeply appreciative of the time and trouble that someone went through to get these boots for me, anonymously. What a terrific act of kindness! Acts of Kindness in any form — from sharing a smile, sending a card, giving a gift, or helping someone — brighten lives and let someone know he or she is appreciated, loved, and cared for.

I definitely will enjoy this wonderful pair of boots. I put them with a pair of Wrangler jeans, and then wore them to work with dress slacks. They feel and look great!

THANK YOU, OH ANONYMOUS ONE! (You know how to find me if you wish to reveal yourself in some way).

Thanks to my dear friend, Kevin, for helping me with this blog post! He always knows just what to say — especially on those very rare occasions when I am at a loss for words.

Life is short: enjoy those unexpected surprises!

Update: I am glad to see that our friends at Justin Brands, along with at least two of their marketing and PR/Advertising firms (Balcom and Nuvox) have found this post. I hope you have enjoyed it.

Internet Influenced Perceptions

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I continue to follow what people are searching and what brings them to this blog, or my personal “boot and leather” website. I remain intrigued.

What I am observing is that there is a lot of curiosity out there, and perhaps a bit of fear or confusion, especially among straight people.

When I was blogging in December of 2008 and 2009 about perceptions of Wesco Boots being “gay,” I delved into my web logs and statistics, and followed leads to posts on some blogs, YouTube, and websites such as hotboots.com. What I found was not surprising: the vast majority, if not 100%, of web-based postings about Wesco boots are by those who have a fetish interest in the boots. (I excluded vendors and the company’s website.)

I explored further. Postings about other kinds of boots, while not as numerous, are also made almost 100% by those with a gay fetish interest once vendors are excluded. For example, on 4 January, someone from Maine searched with the question “are ostrich boots gay?” and right before that, someone from Quebec searched, “cowboy jeans gay?” Seriously, I kid you not. This is an example of dozens of such questions I see every day that generate visits to this blog and my website.

Many people are searching the internet with questions like that, which they wouldn’t have the courage to ask a live human being or if they did ask someone, they would likely receive an affirming answer to a preconceived notion. (That is, they ask people who are like themselves, and who will tell them what they expect to hear.)

Straight people develop perceptions about certain kinds of boots and guys who wear them based a lot on what they are seeing from internet search engine results. Ahhhh! Run for the hills! The boots or jeans are gay!

It is not true that boots can be gay or that gay men choose certain boots or jeans to wear BUT the postings about boots on the internet (especially YouTube) usually are by a gay man (not a woman) and reflect some serious fetish-related interests.

There are a lot of postings on the Internet and on YouTube that combine gay fetish interests — leather, smoking, mild BDSM, stomping, boots, socks, feet, suits, etc. It is not surprising to me that straight people get confused and develop some pretty wild misunderstandings.

But there are very few straight people who post videos or write blogs about leather, boots, etc. (I have linked to two from this blog — Jennifer June’s Cowboy Boots blog, and the Engineer Boot blog, but there are not many others that I could find.)

My assertion remains: you won’t find many straight guys posting videos about their enjoyment of Wesco boots, engineer boots, or cowboy boots. Thus, if all you are seeing on YouTube (or elsewhere) on a non-vendor internet posting is by gay people, it is easy to jump to a conclusion and engage in “guilt by association” — if the poster of a video or website or blog is gay, then what they post about therefore must be “gay” as well. Quod Erat Demonstrandum or ὅπερ ἔδει δεῖξαι.

Interestingly, I have not found quite the same large correlation between gay fetish interests and leather gear. Sure, there are a lot of postings related to leather by gay men (and even a few women.) But there are also many postings by straight guys (particularly in the motorcycle forums) about leather gear. They are asking, “what is functional? What works? How much does it cost? What’s the value?” … all good questions.

I have noticed sometimes that in these forums in which the vast majority of participants are straight guys (including “hard core bikers”), some of them have used a search engine to explore their questions, and the results link to a lot of gay fetish stuff. Some of them post their “concerns” on the forums. I have commented about that behaviour in the past. Usually, such posts by straight guys reflect a generalization about gay people and leather gear. In order to make themselves sound more masculine and “not gay,” sometimes these insecure individuals say some very rude and/or imbecilic things. But just pity and pray them, for they know not what they say, as they do not realize how much the internet is affecting their perceptions.

Life is short: take time to understand the bigger picture. Don’t accept what you see prima facie — especially from Google searches!

Boot and Leather Videos

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A link from a recent post on Straight Acting’s blog to Jonah of Finland’s blog lists what Jonah describes as “Ten Don’ts of Leather Videos.”

Jonah has expressed his opinions, and for the most part, I tend to agree. However, the method by which he stated his comments: “don’t do this” and “don’t do that” takes a negative approach which is unhelpful to the amateur leather guy who produces the occasional amateur video for posting on YouTube for entertainment of fellow guys into leather (and boots and other fetishes.)

What I want to know is what are the “do’s” — not the don’ts — of leather (or boot) videos. It is easy to say what not to do, but not as easy to say what to do.

I have a lot of videos posted on YouTube now. Admittedly, I have created some videos which violate Jonah’s opinions of what he likes or doesn’t like. That’s okay — he doesn’t have to sit through something he doesn’t like. There are some videos that I have created by request of some men with whom I have interacted on the ‘net. I may not have created some of them unless I was asked. Okay, so be it. Done. The requester (and I) enjoyed. That’s enough.

The good thing about internet-based video is that you can view what you like and surf to other videos if what you are seeing does not please or interest you. There are a lot of videos which I started to view then stopped viewing and surfed on, because I have not liked it, the content frightened me, or was just badly done (fuzzy, blurry, and poorly edited). There are some things that I do not care to view, such a stomping stuff, or breaking things. I am not saying that those who create such videos are bad — I am saying that those videos do not interest me. That is okay — I am who I am. Those videos interest others. It’s a big world out there.

Same is true with blogs, as well. Read what you like, surf on if you do not like what you are reading. It’s a free world (except for China), as far as the internet goes. (Regretfully, the Government of China blocks access to blogs and videos posted on YouTube, along with a lot more.)

I do not like lists of “don’t do this” and “don’t do that.” Lists of what not to do are not helpful. What amateur video creators like me want to know is, “what do you want to see?” (within the G-rated limits of what is allowed by YouTube.) As Jonah says, “there are some men who have a hard time coming up with something to do [in the video…so they smoke].” Regardless if one enjoys a video with a guy in leather smoking or not, the point Jonah was making, with which I agree, is that it is very difficult to come up with something to do in a video that is both real and interesting to watch. Acting in a video if one is not an actor is not a good idea. Just rubbing boots or putting on gloves or twirling like a leather model also gets boring. Jonah says that, and I agree.

However, I want to point out that it is a bit hypocritical to offer comments of “what not to do” if one does not engage in producing his own videos. It is much easier to be a critic of others’ work than try to create a work himself. I give credit to Jonah, though, that he acknowledges that he is giving his own opinion “for an audience of one” and also that his is both a beggar and a chooser. Witty guy, he is. I appreciate his candor.

So what to do?

Remember, telling someone what to do is not the same thing as telling someone what not to do. For most people, it is easier to remember what to do (“walk down stairs in case of fire”) instead of what not to do (“don’t use the stairs in case of fire.” — if one is not to use the stairs, then they have to have their wits about them to figure out what to do instead. In an emergency, one may not always be able to think clearly, so they react, and sometimes do the wrong thing. I know this example is unrelated to leather fetish videos, but it gets my point across.)

I do not have much time to create videos, since my partner is not interested in helping me with them and I have to do them when I am at home alone, which is seldom since my partner rarely goes anywhere by himself. However, I am open to ideas for what to do in a video, what actions to show, or what demonstrations or discussions are of interest to others. I would much rather know what to do — not what not to do.

Send me a message or leave a comment on this blog. I will be happy to consider reasonable, appropriate, interesting input. Thanks.

Life is short: figure out what to do!

My Treasure

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This is my aunt, for whom I care and enable her to continue to live an independent life. January 2 marked her 95th birthday. She is doing quite well. I so treasure her as such a marvelous lady. Her physical health remains stable, though her brain function is slowly deteriorating. However, with the help of a good neurologist and GP, appropriate medications, as well as a helper who spends several hours with her on weekdays while I am working, my aunt functions well.

She is so happy. It is such a joy to be around someone who is always chipper, smiling, and pleasant. I know it is a bit rare for someone of that age not to be in worse physical shape, or have developed a bad temperament. Not the case with my lovely aunt. She may repeat stories, or change languages from English to Italian to French to Spanish (and back and forth) as we talk. But continuing to communicate so well is amazing to me.

My partner and I took her out to lunch yesterday, and had a very nice time. There were only about 70 members of our family present, so it was a small crowd. But a joyous and happy one. (Glad I snuck the Xanax into my partner’s juice at breakfast!) [Just kiddin’]

I wore leather jeans and a denim shirt, and boots of course. And, as usual… no one said a thing about what I was wearing.

I feel so blessed… what a treat it is to care for someone who is so special.

Life is short: show those you love that you love them.

New Year’s Hunk

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When I arrived at home from the New Year’s party that I attended, a sexy man was waiting for me, silhouetted by our Christmas tree. How would you react if you saw this man waiting for you?

Sproingggg!

My partner and I sure had fun with our own private welcome to 2010!

….in the morning, we slept until after 9am, which is completely unheard of in our household. Not being in a rush, we snuggled closely and talked about our goals, aspirations, thoughts, and ideas for the coming year. What a nice, gentle way to wake up on the first day of the new year.

The rest of New Year’s Day was more mundane. I passed on going on an annual polar bear motorcycle ride because there was lot of wet, salty crud on the roads that would spray up on my bike and make it an absolute mess and be hard to clean. Plus, we had a lot of other things to do. We finally “got in gear and going” by noon. I visited my sweet, lovely aunt; we did our weekly grocery shopping; and I did a major carpentry job to double the capacity of a closet so that some of my leather gear can have more room for air to circulate around it. We had a productive afternoon, albeit the day started much later than usual.

I had a nice telephone chat with my twin brother, who made it home safely to where he lives in Europe. I also spoke with my brother-in-heart, AZ, who called to wish a Happy New Year. What a sweet, thoughtful man.

Life is short: enjoy!

New Years Eve in Leather

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For the 24th year in a row, I went to my very close friend’s New Year’s eve party, where many of his family gather and ring in the year together. I help him prepare a big breakfast, which we eat about 11:30pm, then we watch the festivities on TV and loudly count down 10..9..8 … 3..2..1 until we all scream “Happy New Year!” We kiss and hug, have a glass of champagne (or in my case, ginger ale), and that’s about it. I usually leave about 12:15pm so I can come home to my partner, and continue our own private festivities.

As usual, I chose some leather to wear. In this case, my Naked Leather Jeans which even though they are unlined, are warm because they are made of thick, 8 to 10oz cowhide. The jeans feel great, and since I recently had the snap closure removed and a zipper installed instead, they fit better (and don’t come unsnapped when I sit down.) On top, I wore a red checked flannel shirt.

Whilst cooking, the host of the party (my close friend) and I don chef’s smocks. Then I occasionally chase him, his wife, or their kids around the kitchen like the Swedish Chef once did on The Muppet Show. (But not with a knife… I use a bottle of oregano, instead…long story about why that spice is chosen.)

Because my friend’s family rivals my own in size, the noise and number of children intimidate my partner, so he after going with me to this party once, he vowed never to return. I don’t consider the party to be too boisterous, but then again, I am accustomed to large groups, and can hold my own. My partner does not like all the noise, running around, and the size of the crowd. (To him, more than one other person is a crowd.) He stays home and watches stuff on TV that I don’t like (such as college football games), and waits for me to come home (and worries; though I don’t drink alcohol, that does not mean that there are not drunk drivers sharing the road with me).

This post was written before the actual New Year’s party, and was scheduled for posting on New Years Day when I will still be snuggled next to my partner in bed. Should he surprise me when I get home, like he did last year, I will post an update. (te he, giggle giggle.)

Life is short: Celebrate with those you love! HAPPY NEW YEAR!