I have a (straight) friend who is a Realtor and who sells homes in the community where I live. I have always thought her to be rather smart, but she floored me when she called me the other day to say, “I have a gay couple I am working with. Would you mind if I gave them your number and asked them to call you to learn about gay real estate?”
Huh?
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I follow posts on a popular social network and observe that for the month of November, some of my friends have posted a daily, “I’m thankful today for…” and then they mention spouses, children, family, and even bosses … as well as their community, religious institution or place of worship, and more.
There has been some observable backlash about these posts. A few others have posted negative comments about the “thankful” posts as appearing to be bragging. “So what if you have a husband and are thankful for his love and support!” someone wrote on a friend’s post. Or “so what that you have a nice house. I lost mine last year in a foreclosure and am barely making ends meet!” another one grumbled on another friend’s message.
For several years around this time of year, I have posted a blog about how grateful and thankful I am. Is that boastful or bragging? Should I continue to do that?
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Most everyone I know, both in my community and at work, is straight. They are not against same-sex marriage, but they are not all that comfortable with it, either.
An example is a friend who is retired from more than 25 years of service in the U.S. military. He is married, has 3 kids, wife, and so forth. As straight as they come. But he is not narrow in his thinking.
He invited a group of us, including me, to a holiday open house. These were his words:
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A friend of mine posted a link to a blog post titled, “Marriage Isn’t For You.”
Judging an article by its title, I asked myself, “if marriage isn’t for you, then why marry?”
Then I read the article, and I got it. Io finalmente capii! Read on….
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My spouse and I continue to find stories in the newspaper about same-sex couples who marry and have the marriage ceremony performed by a publicly prominent individual, including one of the most recent in New Jersey (congratulations, New Jerseyans, on becoming the 14th state +DC to provide marriage equality!)
In September, we read an article in our local newspaper about a Justice who serves on the U.S. Supreme Court conducting the marriage ceremony at the big A-Gay wedding of the President of the Kennedy Center for the Performing Arts. That Justice also performed the same-sex marriage ceremony for the Director of Communications of a major U.S. Federal Government agency.
Readers of this blog know that I have served in public positions in my community. When you serve, even in minor public office as I did, you get to know people who serve in elected office at the local, state, and national level.
Did we think of asking someone who serves in visible, prominent leadership position to marry us?
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I knew it would have to happen sometime. Yesterday, I was checking a certain popular social network and noticed a message that someone defriended me. I clicked on a link and found that his page was still active, so the dropped connection was not due to his account becoming inactive (which happens more often than one would think.)
I used to work closely with this guy for years, and I thought we had built a solid friendship. But I changed jobs and he moved away. We relied on that social network to keep us connected.
I contacted this guy to ask if the defriending was a mistake, and his reply was…
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Yesterday was typically busy. I began the day by taking a brisk walk with a sr. friend who takes twice as many steps as I do in a stride, but covers twice the ground. Man, she’s a fast walker! We got in four miles before 8am!
Then I prepared a home-made waffle for my spouse made from ingredients compatible with his diet which is still restricted due to his long-term illness. While it takes an hour for the whole process, it seems like minutes. My spouse sits at the kitchen table and reads the newspaper to me and we talk about current events.
After that, I took several senior pals grocery shopping. Then after the thrill of chasing four little old ladies around a grocery store wore off, I returned home, put on my biker leathers, revved up the Harley, and…
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I have a large family and a very wide circle of friends from all over the world. I admit, I use a certain social media platform to (try to) keep up on what they are doing, their interests, and their concerns.
My “friends” on that social media network have a wide range of religious and political beliefs. I respect that each person is entitled to his or her opinions. I have often wondered though, since we live on the same planet and my family comes from the same gene pool, how can some of us be fundamentally worlds apart when it comes to certain matters, like the fact that I was born gay and when it became legal in my state, I was legally married in a civil court to my one-and-only man.
There are some fundamental opinions that…
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I continue to see changes occur due to my relationship status change to “married”. My pay stub (actually, a “pay advice statement” indicating what I was paid in salary and what was taken for deductions before the pittance of a remainder is direct-deposited into my bank accounts) now says, “Status: Married.”
Woo-wee! My withholding for Federal and State taxes actually went down, too, making my take-home pay a bit larger. I now am considering how to reallocate what’s left over to various deposit accounts. But first, pay ME!
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I am still on travel for work. I am enjoying what I am doing, though I miss my spouse a lot. I speak with him on the phone each evening, but it’s not the same as having his warm embrace when I get home from work, and to listen to his stories and share our tales of each other’s days.
I was with a group of colleagues at dinner and said as much — I miss my spouse. To that, a colleague asked,
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