Passages

Posted on April 4, 2012 by BHD

There was a book by the title of this blog post that I read many years ago, and decided to re-read this past weekend. I was amazed how relevant its words of wisdom are today as they were on the day I first read this book, though some of the content is a bit dated.

The book’s subtitle is “predictable crises of adult life.”

While I do not intend to add a “book reviews” column to this blog, I want to relate how I am feeling about the passages that my life, and the life of my beloved partner, have been going through.

The book discusses the daunting, challenging, and stressful events of adult life and provides suggestions on turning these difficult events into opportunities for growth. That is far better, and more consistent with my life philosophy, than dwelling on the negative, “why have things changed for the worse?” type of thinking.

My partner and I took a passage together about five years ago, when we attended our last leather fetish event. Went to a leather bar for the last time five years ago also. We realized that we were not interested in those types of activities any more. Late nights. Socializing, or attempts at same, with drama as a result. Going out became more and more expensive and a huge hassle. We found that staying home was just fine with us.

Nowadays, my partner is in one of his major life passages. He had a milestone birthday last November, then his world turned upside down soon thereafter with a serious downturn in his health. Once able-bodied, strong, and independent, he has had to become more dependent on me to do many more things that he ordinarily would do. Suffice it to say, that adjustment has not been easy for him.

Let me nip something in the bud, though. My partner is not bed-ridden. He is able to function, and do simple things like the laundry (for which I remain thankful), and work at his job from home.

My world has been a bit curvy, too. Family and close friends know what’s going on, yet my curves aren’t nearly the depth of what my partner is going through. I’ve been through those curves before in 2004 and 2010, and managed to reset myself. What I didn’t want, though, is for these curves to be thrown at me at the same time my better half needs my full concentration.

I do not intend to publish to the world what else is going on in my life, but it’s significant. Requires lots of work and concentration on my part which is compounded with time that I devote to my partner. Pretty much all else has gone out the window. Many fewer trips with seniors to visit. Once-weekly to take senior pals grocery shopping, when it used to be more often. Almost never see the family any more. I just don’t have the time. And ride my Harley? I wish. Only for commuting, no joy-rides through the countryside.

Compounding all of this is that my partner is on an absolute tear on remodeling significant parts of our kitchen. He “must” have a new floor, now. I agree, the old floor is a mess and is long past its life. I have to replace it — all 460 square feet of it — but I was thinking about doing that work later this summer, not this minute. But to partner, “this minute” isn’t soon enough. I think his anxiousness has something to do with how fragile he is feeling due to his illness. I tell ‘ya, that illness really plays with his head sometimes.

As he faces surgery for a ~~hernia repair~~ hip replacement and long-term treatment with antibiotics that can better fight his underlying illness — who is left to do what needs to be done? Me.

Why not hire contractors to do this work? If you have to ask that question, you really don’t know my ultra-reclusive partner that well. He will not have any strangers in the house while he is recovering, yet his “testadura” demands re-tiling the kitchen floor immediamente. Subito. Rapido. Adesso. Pronto!

Caregiver. Remodeler. Partner. Tile-setter. Health-care Advocate. Friend. Confidant. Builder. Lover. Supporter.

Alas, right now… not “biker.”

So that’s the down-side. The upside?

We will have a new kitchen, which will accommodate my partner’s needs as well as my own culinary creativity.

The kitchen work will be great exercise that my ol’ tired body needs, and hopefully will help me shed a few pounds, too.

My partner will get better. His soreness from the ~~hernia~~ hip situation will be gone. The I.V.-administered antibiotics will fight the monsters within him and get ’em; I’m positively focused this will happen. I have faith.

My senior pals are rallying around me, instead of the other-way around. From bringing me Easter baskets to calling me (instead of me calling them), they are extending their warmth and caring that helps me feel less guilty about not being as attentive.

My family is in constant contact. They are showing how much they care and love both of us every day. For that, I remain truly grateful.

I truly believe that God doesn’t give someone more than he can handle, but I also know that my skills in multi-tasking and juggling are being sorely tested.

Life is short: make positive passages.

Leather Gear Guide for Bikers

Posted on April 2, 2012 by BHD

As readers of this blog know, I am a biker — I ride a Harley-Davidson motorcycle. I’ve been riding for some 30 years.

I also enjoy wearing leather. The motorcycle was the inspiration for getting a lot of my gear, and as I have aged and settled down, most of my leather these days is worn for protection and style while riding, not for fetish interests.

I have received inquiries about my recommendations about various items of leather gear for bikers. I decided to take my “Guide to (fetish) Leather Gear” and create one specifically for (straight) bikers. I left the fetish stuff out and wrote more about the design and function of leather that bikers may choose to buy and wear.

The full Guide to Biker Leather Gear is here.

I cover topics including:

Jackets — what kinds of leather jackets are out there, and what styles are of good quality and work best for bikers.

Vests — many bikers wear leather vests for style, warmth, protection, and to display “club colors”.

Chaps — these are the most versatile leather item a biker (or leatherdude) can own and wear. Chaps are great for providing warmth and protection on cool mornings, and are easy to remove as the day grows warmer. However, there are a LOT of cheap chaps out there that look awful, snap at the bottom of the legs, and are designed poorly. Read my Guide for information on how to select quality, good-looking, well-designed chaps that will make you look like you know what you’re doing and know your gear.

Boots — no biker worth his salt would wear anything but motorcycle boots when operating a motorcycle. No sneakers. No sandals. No flip-flops. While various posts on this blog and my Guide to Motorcycle Boots go into much more detail, I couldn’t write a Guide about Biker Leather without mentioning boots.

Leather Pants, Jeans, and Breeches — confident, secure motorcycle riders know style as well as function. Those who do not worry about what other less intelligent, uninformed people may say will choose functional, stylish, leather gear to wear on their legs. This includes leather pants, jeans, and breeches. I explain how to choose these items to provide warmth, protection, and style to the confident biker while riding.

Leather shirts — again, confident men may choose to wear leather shirts to compliment the biker attire, as well as for warmth and style. My Guide covers information about choosing quality leather shirts for bikers.

Check out my new Guide to Motorcycle Leather Gear. I hope you will find it helpful.

Life is short: wear leather!

While Sipping a Latte, Surfing With My Smartphone

Posted on April 1, 2012 by BHD

Whiling away the hours here at the local hot-spot coffee destination, sipping a Venti-Trenti Latte (with soy milk, of course), I was surfing on my new smartphone, and what did I see? Such a fantastically stylish find in men’s dress footwear!

Aren’t these boots from Allen Edmonds cool? Notice the ventilation in the stylish design? Smooth leather sole, lace-up, dress-shoe appearance. Who would know these are boots?

I used the smartphone’s “find this product” app and its GPS directed me to the nearest Allen Edmonds store in downtown DC.

I gulped down my latte and drove my newly-leased Lexus LS600h L sedan right there. It only took an hour since traffic was light. Easy! I found a valet in front of the store. He promised he would take good care of my Lexus. I tossed him the keys and peered inside the store.

I was wondering if they would allow a guy wearing a cheap thousand-dollar suit with a spot on his three-hundred-dollar silk tie in the door. But they saw my smartphone attached with a holster to my belt, so they knew that I was alright.

An associate showed me around. Wow, what fantastic shoes! And boots! I spent hours trying on all the different styles and designs. The associate was exceptionally attentive. He pampered me by bringing me another fresh soy latte.

A few hours later, I charged a pittance of some US$2,000 on my Amex for five pairs of the latest designs in men’s footwear — one for each day of the week! I called the valet to bring the Lexus around. I accepted the kind offer of the associate to carry my products to my car, and drove home. While driving, I couldn’t resist sending tweets to my friends about my great find in value footwear!

Hmmm… I should have dropped into to Nordstrom’s on my way home to be measured and fitted for at least three suits. My current suits are so ratty. I’ve been wearing them for over six months! But I was so excited about the shoes, I couldn’t wait to get home and show them to my partner! I’ll go get the suits tomorrow.

I can’t wait to wear this stylish new footwear and suits to the latest social gathering here in guppieville! That event is a wine-tasting fundraiser to save the blue-footed boobies of Southern Chile. Such a noble cause.

Read on…

Yeah, right. April fools! The fundraiser is for polar bears! LOL! Gotcha!

Life is short: wear real boots, and leather while you’re at it. And if you think that I lease a car that costs over $112,000, then I have a bridge that I can sell you in Arizona. Or Sydney. Or both….

Persistence for the Partner

Posted on March 28, 2012 by BHD

It seems as if every day presents a new challenge for my partner. His health condition remains difficult, but let me assure you, he is fairing as best as he can. He is working part-time, resting and eating well. However, his medical condition remains fragile, and messes with his head. Literally. He can’t think logically and easily gets overwhelmed, which results in confusion, agitation, and bouts of emotion.

We are in it for the long-haul. I am as committed to him as ever….
Continue reading →

Replacement Wesco Boots?

Posted on March 27, 2012 by BHD

Last week, I sold a pair of tall black Wesco harness boots. Those boots were very good-looking, and I liked them a lot. I received a lot of compliments on them when I wore them. However, they did not fit me any more and I agreed with my partner’s assessment that keeping them would not be a good idea, as they would collect dust and make me feel sad because I couldn’t wear them.

The boots sold at auction for a great price — more than I paid for them originally. A couple people noticed that and sent me a message asking if I would replace them with a new pair, especially since the prices for Wesco boots are going up on April 1.

My reply?

No, I will not replace them with another pair of Wesco boots. While Wesco boots are top-of-the-line and are solid as a tank, I have plenty of other motorcycle boots that I like to wear. I have arrived at the point in my life where I choose boots for practical reasons and for comfort. I hate to say it, but Wesco boots are so heavy that my feet feel tired when I wear them. I do not attend leather fetish events where the boots would make a commanding appearance. I wear boots for practical reasons — for safety when I ride my Harley.

Since I have other Wesco boots that still fit fine, as well as a stable of other good-quality motorcycle boots, I really do not “need” another pair of tall Wesco harness boots. I can do without replacing them, and keeping the funds in savings.

Generally, I am rather fiscally frugal, and the appeal to save money is greater to me than the appeal to pay a princely sum for another pair of boots that I do not need.

This is a difficult decision to make for someone like me, but at my age, it is time that I realize that priorities are changing. Collecting more boots that I will not wear but once in a while is not that good of an idea. Time to focus on the future. Save money, continue to build my reserve fund, retirement investments, and so forth.

My partner is in full agreement.

Does this mean that I have stopped acquiring boots and never will buy another pair? Not likely. But my priorities for buying boots that are built like a tank, are heavy and expensive, have changed.

Life is short: be willing to reassess priorities.

Justin Brands is Like General Motors? What?

Posted on March 25, 2012 by BHD

Someone sent me an email recently that said:

First, let me say I love your reviews and videos on the various boots. Keep up the good work! I wanted to get your opinion on Chippewa’s harness boots.

I was in a store today and almost bought a pair, but couldn’t decide between the black or the bison.

The quality seemed to be good, but I notice on the box that they are now a division of Justin boots. Do you think they are still a good choice, or would Wesco be better in the long run?

I understand his concern. Within the last decade, we have seen some major boot brands leave the United States and source bootmaking by whatever methods and companies can do it cheaper, while simultaneously increasing the profit margin for the label owner.

Here is what I said in my reply…

Thank you for the compliments on my website and videos. I appreciate your taking the time to write to me and share that, as well as ask a question.

Chippewa boots have been owned by a consolidated company called Justin Brands since 1984. Justin Brands also owns the companies that make boots with the labels of Tony Lama, Justin, Justin Original Work Boots, and Nocona.

Think of Justin Brands as the General Motors of the boot industry. One company with different brands under one umbrella. (What gets confusing is that Justin Brands is one company under a larger umbrella of Berkshire Hathaway, a huge conglomerate that owns many companies that make everything from candy to bricks, or offers products like insurance or newspapers.)

When we have to worry is when a bootmaker begins sourcing production in China, India, or Pakistan. That’s when lower quality materials and workmanship occur. We saw this happen, for example, with Frye boots. Once made in the U.S. with quality materials and standards, these boots are now made by whatever Chinese company gives the owner of the label (Li & Fung) the lowest bid, or best return on their investment.

So far, Justin Brands has kept production in the United States for most of their boots, and outsource only a few of the cowboy boots (Nocona, Tony Lama, Justin) to just over the border in Northern Mexico — which is okay, because boots made in Mexico are well-made of good materials.

You see a lot of Chippewa boots in my collection, and let me tell you, I’m rather finicky about quality. My Chippewa boots have held up well under rather stressful conditions of every-day wear and riding my Harley.

You said that you almost bought a pair — I’d say, go get them. The choice between black and bison is more personal, as whether you like black or brown, or the texture of smooth grain leather or a more “pebble” surface as found on bison. Either are a good choice.

Of course, I wouldn’t dissuade you from buying Wesco boots, either. Those are top-of-the-line in quality and construction, and are still made by a small family-owned company in Oregon. Trouble is, for a lot of guys, the cost of Wesco boots being more than double that of Chippewa boots tends to be a major issue. To me, Chippewa is to Chevrolet as Wesco is to Hummer. A Chevy will get you where you want to go in casual comfort, while a Hummer will get you where you want to go as if you were riding in a tank.

By the way, I noticed in 2010 that a small tag line on the boxes of Chippewa boots indicates the ownership by Justin Brands. I don’t think they said that on their boxes before that, even though Chippewa boots has been owned and operated by Justin Brands since 1984.

Thanks for asking, and enjoy your boots!

BHD

Life is short: know your boot brands.

Amusing Internet Searches

Posted on March 23, 2012 by BHD

Every now and then, I look at internet searches that bring visitors to my website. Here are some of the more recent and amusing searches. Some I can answer, some I cannot, and one — I haven’t a clue. Here goes:

1. Good boots to wear with cows.

I guess the best recommendation that I can make for boots to wear with cows are boots that are made of skins such as lizard, ostrich, kangaroo, or goat. I betcha that cows would object if you wore leather boots made of… you know… their brethren.

2. How to cut jeans to fut over booys

While I have enjoyed many visits to Australia (see origination of this search), and I know we share the same language — I still cannot figure out what “fut over booys” means. At all. (Perhaps this is a typing error since this was done on one of those i-gadgets).

3. What to say when someone asks why you are wearing cowboy boots.

Good question! Here are some suggestions —

a. I like how they look. Aren’t they cool? Let me lift my pants so you can see them better.

b. If you think these boots are cool, you should see my boyfriend’s boots! Wow!

c. I got them as a gift, and appreciate the thoughtfulness of (name of giver.)

d. These boots are more comfortable than your (dorky) dress shoes.

e. I’m tired of dressing like a clone.

f. My horse suggested the boots.

g. These boots fit and feel better than my horse’s shoes.

h. Why not?

4. Can you wear men’s motorcycle boots in summer?

Well, duh… summer is prime riding season. Bikers wear boots.

Answer, seriously: YES! You can (as yes, it is possible) to wear motorcycle boots in the summer. It is also preferable, as you “should.”

However, some guys have had a bad experience with boots feeling hot during the summer. Boots that do not fit well or were made of materials other than leather (such as “man-made uppers”) that do not breathe probably resulted in your feet and legs feeling fried, hot, and clammy.

Best way to resolve that situation is to invest in quality all-leather boots that fit you correctly. Please — size of your sneakers is probably way off from the true size of your foot and correct boot size. Go into a shoe store and get both feet measured. (Funny thing, but most motorcycle dealers that also carry boots seldom have a device that measures foot size for boots.) Once you know your “shoe size,” you can find a pair of boots that will fit.

Good quality, well-made boots, like Chippewa Firefighters or harness/engineer boots will not only feel good (and not be hot), they also will look good and protect you at the same time.

5. How should men wear cowboy boots?

Tah-dum: on their feet. ‘nuf said. (I still can’t believe how frequently this question is entered into a search engine.)

Life is short: wear boots on your feet … and have a nice day!

Evidence: Harley Riders’ Footwear

Posted on March 21, 2012 by BHD

The following images were taken from a photo that I took of a group of men and women who I went on a motorcycle ride with recently. These guys ride regularly and belong to the same group that I do. We ride together often (as often as my schedule permits, anyway.)

This proves beyond doubt that real bikers wear boots. See any sneakers? No? End of story.

Life is short: wear motorcycle boots when you operate a motorcycle.

What boots did I wear? I wore my Wesco combat boots for a little different style. Too bad the leather BDUs inflated with air and look kinda puffy. But the BDUs bloused into the boots looked and felt great while riding.

What To Wear When Riding a Harley Part III

Posted on March 19, 2012 by BHD

To continue with this short series of posts about what to wear when riding a Harley (or any other brand of motorcycle), let me continue a little bit more about the boots part of the rider’s attire.

My most recent blog post described why wearing boots is important, and talked about various kinds of motorcycle boots out there. The post before that discussed gear like jackets.

What I did not communicate much about is why boots are so much better than sneakers (trainers).

After all, most guys think, “sneakers have rubber soles, and give me traction when I walk, run, or play sports while wearing them, so why wouldn’t they be okay to wear while riding my motorcycle?”

Perhaps this message from someone who wrote to me recently will give a hint:

After consulting with other bikers I know regarding boots, [they] know bikes but not boots. Case in point, my coworker confessed his bike tipped over at a light during a stop because he was standing in a patch of oil. He tried to hold up his bike and gave himself a hernia. He was wearing Sketcher’s boots.

I have been riding with a pair of CAT steel toe boots and on a 200 mile trip to the desert from the central coast, I nearly slipped at a stop and while you can’t prevent every slip, the lug sole of Wesco looks second to none. People drop 5K on new pipes and carb rejet and will wear boots from Walmart I have learned.

There are a number of things that this guy’s message brings out:

1. The necessity for oil-resistant soles. Think about it — when you stop a motorcycle on pavement, you are usually placing your foot to balance the bike on a place where oil droplets have been deposited from vehicles that have passed that way before. If it hasn’t rained hard in a while, then it is very likely that there is a thin film of oil on the road. The lightweight synthetic material from which the soles of modern-day sneakers are made cannot get a grip on that thin film of oil, so when a sneaker-clad foot hits just the wrong patch of oil-coated pavement, the sole slips. Down you go.

Quality boots designed for motorcycling have oil-resistant soles, and it will say so on the product (such as an imprint on the sole or a label inside the boot shaft.) Vibram soles are known to be oil-resistant.

Bottom-line: the soles of sneakers do not resist oil and easily slip, while oil-resistant motorcycle boot soles are less likely to slip.

2. Some makers of sneakers call their shoe a boot. Even if a sneaker comes up six inches, it is still not a boot. A boot is a boot, not a sneaker. Do not confuse the two.

3. Even if some boots are made to offer protection to the foot — such as a steel toe — it does not mean that the sole of that boot offers the gripping power required by motorcyclists — particularly for those who operate heavyweight bikes like a Harley. Steel toe CAT work boots are designed for activities like construction work. While on any given day the soles of those boots offer moderate traction for a biker, it only takes one interaction with a little bit of oil or uneven section of road where a biker could briefly lose his footing, and thus drop the bike. That’s why you have read on this blog over the years why I am such a big fan of Vibram 100 (“big lug”) soles. Like snow tires for the feet.

4. A guy will spend all sorts of money on bells & whistles for his Harley — new chrome, pipes, engine modifications, and toys & gadgets like GPS, bluetooth, CB radio, and so forth … but then invest less than US$100 on the very thing that could save his life and protect his ride from damage — motorcycle boots with an oil-resistant sole. Doesn’t make sense, but as the above story points out, it happens all too often. I’d rather spend US$450 on a pair of Wesco boots or $200 on a pair of Chippewa Firefighter boots than spend the same amount of money on something that may make my bike appear a little different from another guy’s Harley. You answer this question: what’s more important?

In summary, good boots are important. Not only for protection of the foot, but for grip on the road.

Life is short: wear lug-soled boots when riding. (and always wear a helmet!)

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