Riveted

I really like my new Retro Biker Chaps that I received recently, which were custom-made by 665 Leather of West Hollywood, California, USA.

The chaps came with four types of closures: a belt with a “665” buckle, a belt with a traditional D-ring buckle, a plain black band, and four snap-on D-rings that are closed with a long leather lace. Each of these closures snap onto the inside of each side of the upper part of the chaps at the waist onto two small snaps.

I guess that type of variable closure system is great for guys who wear the chaps to pose in. However, if you will wear them which actually riding a motorcycle, then the snaps that hold the front closures on are poorly made. The closure unsnaps much too easily. Swing your leg over the saddle of the bike, and you hear, “click,” which is a snap unsnapping. Walk 20 paces and hear “click” again. Sit down or stand up… “click” … “click”. Before you know it, the front closure has come undone and the chaps open up/fall down.

I thought of returning the chaps to request better quality snaps. However, it took so long to get them in the first place, I was worried that it would take months again to get them fixed right. I thought of taking them to my favorite leather repair guy to request better snaps, but re-thought the whole matter.

How will I wear these chaps? With a belt. Will I wear any other of the closure options? No, not really. So I fixed the problem myself.

I permanently attached the belt closure ends onto each side of the front of the chaps with rivets. Yes: plain, ordinary, rivets. They work great. I rode my Harley with the chaps on and closed with the riveted belt, and they felt fine. Better yet, they didn’t open as I swung my leg over the saddle, while I was riding, or when I dismounted.

Life is short: make adjustments that work for you and your style.

Gay "Lifestyle" vs. Sexual Orientation

I do not hide the fact that I am a man and am in love with a man. That is my sexual orientation: male-male. I was born that way. Of course, I didn’t know my sexual orientation as a child, but as I grew older and explored my sexuality, I realized that I liked men for more things than just being buddies. I liked women, too, but kept the relationships as friends, but had no sexual interest in them.

Recently, I received and read an email from someone I know who is going through a tough time in his life. In that message, he said that he was going to “live conservatively and be straight.” He said that years ago, he “crossed to the other side” when he lived with a man as his partner. But now he has “nothing against the gay lifestyle (for me) BUT he is now going to live straight.”

Oh criminey. This guy is confusing issues which probably has to do with what he reads and hears from media reporting about sexual identify, sexuality, and sex. In my opinion, he was saying things that confuse two basic human characteristics: one’s sexual orientation and one’s choice of how to live — one’s lifestyle.

My lifestyle, as I described it to him, is that I am “a fairly conservative living, politically liberal-leaning, community-oriented, faithful family-oriented caregiver who happens to enjoy riding a Harley and likes to wear boots and leather.” This has nothing to do with my sexual orientation and that a man is my mate, and I choose to have sex only with him (that choice is called monogamy).

He had no idea how offensive it was to me for him to refer to someone’s sexual orientation as a “lifestyle” as if I could have chosen to “be” gay or “be” straight. I am who I am and my sexual orientation is what it is.

I think this is the fundamental core of the ongoing debate and rage in society, where Bible-thumping conservatives think that one can choose his sexual orientation, or that someone who has a same-sex sexual orientation can have it changed to an opposite-sex orientation. I truly do not believe that is possible (or healthy) — at least with me (and my partner.)

I do make the choice to be in love with one man, and to have sex only with him. There are other gay men who play in wider circles. That’s not for me to judge, as I request that they not judge me for the fact that my partner and I keep our sex lives to ourselves.

Life is short: don’t refer to something that someone is born with as a choice, when it is not.

Are You Alive?

The doctor quickly felt my forehead, and re-read the blood pressure results … 91/54. “Are you alive?” She looked at me with grave concern.

This happened actually while on a visit to the doctor with my aunt. I have had to take her to weekly follow-up visits with her regular physician. It’s quite an ordeal, as my aunt can barely walk, yet we have to navigate six steps to get her out of her building and into a wheelchair. Once in the chair, then we take her to a car, then transfer her into it, then go to the doctor’s office on the other side of her complex.

Yesterday, the doctor wanted to know my aunt’s blood pressure. As the tech was preparing to wrap the blood pressure cuff around my aunt’s arm, my aunt reacted with alarm, “what’s that???” I reassured her that it’s nothing new, nothing strange, and wouldn’t hurt. My aunt was still dubious. (Damn Alzheimer’s… my aunt forgot what is done to measure blood pressure.)

So I stuck out my arm and asked the tech to take my blood pressure, so I could show my aunt that it doesn’t hurt. The tech complied, and the result showed on the screen of the blood pressure device just as the doctor walked into the room. I explained what I had done. The doctor glanced at the results, and then asked, “are you alive?”

For men of my height, age, and size, such a blood pressure reading is considered to be borderline “low.” I do not quite know why my BP is so low, but it’s better that way than being high, which requires medical attention, medication, and can lead to a variety of other problems.

I guess having a low BP enables me to remain calm when others get upset and angry. It takes quite a bit to get me upset. I have been angry, but when I am upset, I do not yell, scream, or throw temper tantrums. I write. I write and write and write. I direct my anger to its source. That seems to keep me calm. I do not know why.

Nonetheless, the doctor advised me to see my regular physician as a follow-up. I may — or may not — as my last full physical was just a couple months ago and I’m okay, including my BP. My doc knows that I have borderline low BP and hasn’t asked me to change anything, but to keep an eye on potential symptoms. I only have one of those symptoms, which I won’t mention, but is manageable.

Anyway, I got a big laugh when the doctor asked me about how I was feeling, and if I were alive, as an outcome of reading my blood pressure. Yeah, I affirm, I’m fine. Calm, cool, collected….

Life is short: what’s your B.P.?

Do you BLUF?

BLUF, the Breeches and Leather Uniform Fanclub, has been around for quite a while. It is based in Europe, where guys seem to be more freely out and open in their leather gear. Most of them post pictures in their toughest, roughest leather. Grrrrr….

I have been a fan of breeches, leather, uniforms (and boots) for longer than the Internet has been around. I wear leather regularly when the weather is suitable, and not always when I am on my motorcycle.

BLUF has some of events and gatherings in Europe, which from what I read are rather, ahem… (not “G” rated!) While I have never attended nor plan to attend any of these events, they are interesting to read about. Heck, I will not attend any similar events here in the United States, but that is not because anything is wrong with the events or the guys who attend them. It’s me… just old, settled, monogamously partnered me with a partner who cannot travel due to a disability, and the fact that I do not go anywhere without him (thus, we’re bound to home). Further, I do not have the energy or stamina to attend such events which start late at night and last until dawn. I just can’t handle it. In addition, I am “fiscally frugal,” and don’t want to shell out the bucks for a trip to Europe.

However, there’s nothing quite like a good-lookin’ guy decked out from boots to Muir Cap in full leather, featuring breeches and a leather jacket. This captivating image is of Leatherman Paul of Toronto, Canada, (BLUF member 211) whose image completely bespeaks what I am describing, and moreso. He’s a hunk, isn’t he? I am honoured to call him a friend. (Photo used with permission.)

Do you BLUF? I’m member #188 … been a member for a long time. I just recently updated my profile and photos on that site, which has been long overdue.

Life is short: get in gear. Say, “woof!”

She’s Heeeere….

Every summer, my partner drives to his old hometown where his mother lives, picks her up, and brings her back to our home to visit for a week. There they are, Mom & Partner.

I’ll be quite busy this week keeping her fed, entertained, fed, informed, fed, and fed. Did I mention that she eats a lot? Noisily? Three meals a day, plus snacks… and she still weighs less than 90lbs (41kg).

Oh well, life is short. This week will be long, but life itself is short. I keep reminding myself of that.

Sneakers Against the Law?

I saw another google search that landed on this blog. The question entered was, “is it against the law to wear sneakers on a motorcycle?” I presume the person meant, “while operating a motorcycle.”

Well, unfortunately, it is not illegal to wear sneakers while operating a motorcycle. However, in my opinion, wearing sneakers, “tennies,” sandals, flip-flops, or bare feet while operating a motorcycle is just stupid.

I have blogged about this here, here, and here, so I won’t repeat.

While I think that motorcycle operators should wear long pants and boots at all times while riding, I don’t think government should pass a law requiring that. There are a number of laws on the books that address “stupid.” Unfortunately, outlawing sneakers and motorcycle riding isn’t one of them.

For gosh sakes, use your common sense. Repeat after me: “sneakers are for the gym. Boots are for motorcycles.” Period.

Life is short: wear boots while riding. Always.

Way Too Friggin’ Hot

Yesterday, the heat index where I live was 105°F (40.5°C). Today, it is projected to be as high as 115°F (46°C). This is just ridiculous. Who says there’s no global warming? Oh yeah, right, you read my posts during our relentless, patience-wearing, Snowpocalypse II and its earlier brother, the Blizzard of ’09.

I had to go see my aunt yesterday, and did something that I rarely do: I drove my truck and kept the AC on. I rarely use the AC in my truck, and when it’s dry and sunny, I prefer to ride my motorcycle. But it was just way too hot to sit on a heat-producing bike in jeans and boots.

I did wear boots yesterday when I went out, but wore short Chip Bombers that are loose and lightweight. I have to be honest, though, as soon as I got home, I got naked. Yep, I stripped off all of my sweaty clothes, put them in the wash, and didn’t put any other clothing (or boots) on for the rest of the day.

Yeah, I have AC in my house, but I chose not to turn it on. I stayed in the basement most of the time where it is naturally very cool. I also prepared some home-cooked meals that keep well. This was in advance of our annual summer visit by the mother-in-law, who arrives later today. Oh, joy… but that’s another story.

I relented and turned the AC on about 7pm so it would be cool enough to sleep on the bedroom level (upper floor) by the time I went to bed at 8:30pm.

BTW, in case you were wondering, my partner left yesterday morning to drive to his mother’s home in da’ ‘burgh, and bring her back today. Oh, joy.

Meanwhile, it was kinda fun being alone… naked… and working at the computer, catching up on some reading of professional journals on-line, answering backlogged email, and not having to do anything other than what I wanted to do.

Well, I wanted to make a video as I had some time, but I am totally out of video ideas, and it was too hot to make one outside, anyway. Oh well, perhaps someone will give me an idea for a video that isn’t too strange, impossible, or difficult to do alone. My partner will take his mother back home at the end of next week, so I’ll have another day to myself when she’s gone to do some video work, if I can think of something, and hopefully, the weather will be more cooperative.

Life is short: it’s also too hot, sometimes.

Back Support


Okay, I admit it, I’m not getting any younger. And as bikers age, they need more support when the ride.

Shown above is a new back rest that I installed on my Harley. I got a Harley gift card from my former employer as a going-away gift, so I used it to buy this back rest. It was easy to install once I stopped trying to decipher the pictographic directions.

I am wearing my Retro Chaps that I recently received. It’s too hot to wear leather (other than boots) while riding, but I put them on for some photos for my website.

The new back rest feels great. My back definitely feels more supported as I ride.

Now… if I can only find the time to go on a ride!

Life is short: make accommodations!

Friggin’ Blister

Last Sunday I mowed the lawn. No big deal. But my formerly broken ankle was sore again, and hurt most where the top of my short work boots reached the ankle. So I decided to wear my Wesco Combat Boots which are a bit taller, and came above the former broken bone so when laced closed, the boots would provide more support.

As soon as I got out of my cast and could wear boots again, those were the boots I wore because the lacing made them adjustable, so they could accommodate the residual swelling. I even mowed the lawn in those boots back in April and May.

I never had a problem with those boots causing a blister. Not until this past Sunday. When I was done with the lawn, I went inside to take a cold shower to cool off as it was friggin’ hot outside. When I took my boots off and peeled off my socks, I screamed in pain. My gosh, what a big friggin’ ugly sore blister on the back of my right heel!

How in the hell did that happen? Probably the old socks I was wearing were the culprit. They had worn thin at the heel. Pushing the mower up our small hill is where I think the blister happened, as I was causing the boot to rub a lot against the skin of my heel. Damn, when I first felt a little tingle that is a sign of a blister, I should have stopped right away and taken care of it. But no…. I kept going and much to my dismay this damn blister happened.

I’ll survive. But I tell ‘ya, it’s hard to find a pair of boots to wear that do not cause my heel to hurt like hell. I am now wearing a bandage, moleskin, and two pairs of socks over the blister. I take all that stuff off at night so air can get to it so it can heal. I am choosing boots that I don’t wear as often because they were big on me. But with two pairs of socks and those layers over the blister, I need larger boots to accommodate the protection.

Meanwhile, I am walking with a distinctive limp … again … sigh. Oh well, as I said, I’ll survive.

Life is short: blisters happen.

Engaging

I’m taking a brief aside in this post, to discuss matters related to community advocacy and action. Most long-term readers of this blog have noted that I engage from time to time in activities that benefit the neighborhood, community, county, and state where I live. (I didn’t mention “city” because I do not live within the boundaries of an incorporated city.)

Most of my engagement is by bringing people together to discuss issues of concern — from crowded roads, to public safety, to zoning for development, to density of growth (planned or unplanned), to environmental concerns, and so forth.

One does not have to have a degree in political science or have served in public office to do this type of work. Being able to work with people, to listen, to learn and to study, and to be patient are key requirements. In order to be effective at advocating about issues, raising concerns, and making your community a little bit better, I have found the following activities helpful to achieve success:

1. Find out who else in the area has similar concerns. Bring them together at a meeting. (Offer food at the meeting, and get better attendance.) Try to achieve consensus or agreement among your neighbors about the issue. Your message is much more powerful if you can say, “WE (emphasis added) all agree on this…”.

2. Accept the fact that everyone does not think the same way you do. Listen, listen, listen. Hear what other people have to say and seek out the input and advice from those you think may oppose you. Yeah, that’s right: you have to hear what “the other side says” so you can have a better grasp of the issue from all points of view, even if you disagree with it.

3. Do your homework. It is highly unlikely that the issue about which you are concerned is brand new. It is more likely that the issue has been reviewed, debated, and discussed in the past. Find past public records, archived newspaper articles, and people who were around “back then” and learn the history. There is a lot of “re-inventing the wheel” that goes on in public advocacy that doesn’t have to.

4. Try working with and through staff first. That is, before you fire off a letter to your State Senator or County Commissioner, my advice is to find the administrative department that is responsible for the issue and make some phone calls. Ask questions. Perhaps they have already resolved the matter yet haven’t implemented it yet. Give the staff a chance to explain positions and situations first, before running amok and sending letters that ultimately get turned over to staff anyway. Usually, staff know about specific matters more thoroughly and can answer questions directly rather than going through an intermediary, such as an elected official.

5. Keep the issue within the correct level of responsibility. For example, if you are concerned about a state road, then you have to bring your issue to the correct department at the state level, not your local city or county transportation department, or your local elected officials. They will all say the same thing: “not my job.” I can’t tell you how many times I have advised colleagues not to go to the county about such-and-such an issue because it’s a state matter, or vice-versa. So much time is wasted that way. Find the right place to go first, rather than spin wheels and get turned away because the person you’re asking literally cannot help.

6. If you run into red tape, push-back, recalcitrance, excuses, or other lame fall-deroll from staff about an important issue, then it’s time to approach elected officials. Begin by finding out which elected official serves your district (where you live), or serves at-large. You will probably find multiple elected officials who serve you (usually one or two for your residential district, and all “at-large.”) To refine the list further, look for information about which committees these officials serve. For example, if you have a transportation issue, then ideally the best elected official with whom to communicate is a representative who serves your district (or at-large) and serves on the Transportation Committee. Think about it, if your district rep serves on the Education committee, then he/she won’t be as much help.

7. Again, before you fire off that letter or make that phone call demanding to speak only to the elected official, instead, ask to speak with the staff person in the elected official’s office who deals with that issue. It is not widely recognized, but most elected officials, even at the city and county level, have staff who specialize in certain matters. One person may handle schools and public safety, while another handles development and transportation. Call the elected representative’s staff first! I betcha they have already dealt with the matter, and may have information and answers — all available just for the asking.

8. If the elected officials’ staff don’t have the answers you seek or if the elected official is considering a position on the matter before a vote, then by all means, ask to speak with that official. And yes, I mean “speak” as in “talk to.” Don’t just write a letter and think you’re done with it. Communicate with the official in person or by phone. It never ceases to amaze me how often local elected officials tell me that the public seems to be afraid to talk to them, so they don’t always know what people want or are thinking. Look at it this way: you (and your neighbors) voted in the last election which put these people into office. Even if you didn’t vote for that person, nonetheless, they are serving in public office and therefore represent you. Communicate with your representatives. It is your civic duty and their responsibility to communicate with constituents.

9. Follow-up verbal communications with a polite letter saying “it was nice to speak with you on (date) about (subject). Here is what we agreed on (item, item, item). Thank you for your support.” Confirm it in writing. Elected officials communicate with hundreds of people each day. Unless they know you personally, it is not likely they will remember your name or the specific conversation when a vote comes up. But they will remember better if they have something in writing to refer to.

10. Whenever a major issue may be considered by a body politic, they will hold public hearings. Find out the schedule of the hearing and plan to attend. Get on the schedule to testify. You do not need to be a registered lobbyist to testify at a public hearing! I am not a lobbyist, but I testify often. Why? I care. I prepare by writing down what I want to say. I find out if there are limits to the amount of time allowed for testimony. Usually, it’s 3, 5, or 10 minutes. Write it all out, then “present” it to your neighbors, family, friends, or anyone who will listen. Use their input to refine your points and get it to be within the time limit. Then go say your piece, and provide written copies of your testimony so it can be part of the record.

11. Follow-up, in writing. Write a short, polite, letter to each person who heard your testimony thanking them for their time and their service, and for listening to what you have to say. Even if you think they may vote contrary to your position, you will be considered highly among the officials and their staff by paying attention to details like this. Believe me, written follow-up doesn’t happen often, and when it does, it makes an impact.

12. Avoid veiled threats such as “you will lose my vote in the next election if….” or “I’ll tell all my friends what a loser you are if you don’t vote the way I want you to.” Elected officials have heard that before and will hear it again, and have learned not to pay attention to such threats. Making such threats doesn’t help, and often hurts by damaging a relationship with someone elected to serve (even if their position isn’t yours).

13. If a vote doesn’t turn out the way you want, continue your advocacy by collecting information on what the impact of that decision has had on “real people” — your neighbors, and those who are the constituents of those elected officials. Provide that feedback to the elected officials. Again, “impact statements” are seldom received. Most people think “what’s done is done” and it’s all over. Believe me, it isn’t. If you don’t like how something turned out, it can be changed. You just have to continue to pursue it and share information persistently. I have a record of getting some positions reversed simply by collecting and providing those “impact statements.”

14. Finally, be patient. The wheels of local, state, and federal government turn very slowly. Most people give up, and that’s something that elected officials expect. Those who persist and continue to fight for what’s right eventually see a positive result. For example, I fought for eight years to get a bill passed in my home state to prohibit the use of hand-held cell phones while operating a motor vehicle. The bill finally passed, although watered down, in 2010. My next work on this issue will be to strengthen the bill. I haven’t stopped my advocacy just because a nudge in the right direction finally happened.

Well, enough for now. Advocacy, community action, service … call it what you will. It’s not rocket science, but is the fundamental right of an engaged, Democratic Society. This is why I love America. Right or wrong, we can all engage and have our voices heard.

Life is short: engage!