Monthly Archives: April 2009

Leather Suit Goes To The Prom

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It’s interesting as well as somewhat amusing to me that my blog post yesterday about “smart leather” and the leather suit I assembled out of leather garments I had in my leather gear collection generated a flurry of visitors to my blog. (It is also amazing and somewhat scary to me how fast Google works, but then again, Blogger is owned by Google, so content on my blog is autoindexed or something like that… but I digress.)

Yesterday, over 500 unique visitors viewed one or more pages of my blog — over 1,700 pages in all were viewed (perhaps even read?) — by visitors from all over the world. That’s a new record.

Someone who told me that he googled “full black leather dress suit” wrote an email to me that said this:

“I read your blog and looked at your website where you described a leather suit. I really want one of those. I think it’s cool. I am going to my high school prom in a few weeks. I want to be the guy who shows up in a full leather suit or tux. Do you know where I can rent one?“

I exchanged several email messages with this guy. I described for him how and where to get the gear that would compose a full leather suit, from the garments to the boots to the gloves. However, I told him that he would probably have to buy all the leather gear because I didn’t think he could rent dress leather pants, as well as a leather shirt, tie, and jacket. I suggested that he discuss his dream with his parents, because “going leather for the prom” would be much more expensive than just renting a tux and buying a corsage for his date. He seemed disappointed, but thanked me profusely for the information.

I thought that was the end of it, when lo and behold I received another email from him. He said that he talked with his father, who agreed to get him the gear if he really wanted it. He said that his father understood the practical and ongoing value of durable leather gear. (This kid has a really cool Dad!)

What caused me to have the biggest smile was the closing of his last email to me:

“Thanks for all those recommendations. My Dad said that I could get the leather clothes to make a full leather suit if I promised to wear it more than just to the prom. I really want to. I like it. I think it’s cool. Like you.”

Aw shucks. I’m just trying to help out an emerging leather dude. Hey, Straightjacketed: see what you started over on your blog? Great going! We’ve got more guys emerging in their leather in public from our mutual efforts. Who would have thought that would happen as a result of a few blog posts?

Life is short: wear your leather!

Smart Leather: Dress Leather

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I was reading Straightjacketed’s blog post about “Smart Leather” and commented on his blog that wearing neckties isn’t something that I enjoy doing. I am happy that for the most part, I usually can avoid having to have one of those nooses around my neck at work. I also made a side comment about ties making me feel bound and how I don’t like that feeling. That was an expression I have used for a long time. However, I must remember to be careful about making such commentary on the blog of a bondophile (smile). This past blog post explains why I don’t like bondage, but also explains why I do not have bad opinions about those who do. The subculture of gay leathermen has room for everyone’s preferences and tastes.

Nonetheless, the blog author is a good sport, and joined in the commentary on his own blog which redirected it back to the direction he was posting about. The main focus of his blog post was in response to yet another blog: the concept of suit and tie being is a fetish for some guys.

Wearing ties or the suit-and-tie concept has never been a fetish of mine. As I grew up, I resisted any occasion where I had to dress up. I just didn’t like it. My twin brother, on the other hand, loved to dress up and still does. As I have often said, he got the “suit genes” and I got the leather jeans (LOL!).

My fellow blogger posted images from the on-line Northbound Leather Catalog of a nice looking guy in a full leather suit. I have always been impressed with the quality of the leather gear from Northbound. I perused their website and thought to myself, “hmmm, a full leather suit might be nice.”

Then I had one of those moments where I slapped myself upside the head and said, “you’ve got all the pieces — a dress leather shirt, dress leather pants, dress leather tie, and even an old black leather blazer — so put it all together and you already have your full leather suit.” I put it all on and took a series of photos for a new page on my website titled, appropriately enough, Full Leather Suit.

I realize that I do have to get a better fitting dress jacket (mine is over 10 years old and too small), and probably a newer dress leather shirt because the one I have shrunk when it got soaked once by a surprise storm when I was wearing it while riding my Harley. But what I have will do, for now.

Is this “smart leather?” It will work for those rare occasions where I have to wear a suit for some other occasion than for a formal business meeting related to work. Now I’m thinking this will be just the outfit when I go out to dinner with my partner for our anniversary next week.

Life is short: wear your leather! (And thanks to my buddy in the U.K. for this blog post inspiration!)

I Met the Me of 30 Years Ago

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30 years ago, when I was 21 years old, I idolized the biker image: The boots, leather, and the Harley. I worked over time to acquire the resources to assume that image, from buying various pieces of biker leather gear and boots, to even getting a Harley eventually.

Yesterday was a stunningly beautiful sunny day. It reached 78°F (25.5°C) with a low dew point. My partner and I awoke before dawn, snuggled for a little bit, then set about accomplishing a lot of tasks.

By 11am we were done, and I prepared an early lunch. Then my partner said, “we’re done–I know you’re itching to go ride your Harley, so go!” I flashed him a huge smile, gave him a hug, donned my unlined Wesco Boss Engineer boots, jeans, and my vest, and off I went. There was an open-house at a Harley dealership, which was my destination. My dress was “traditional biker” as it was too warm for leather breeches. I just felt like wearing my old comfortable Wranglers over my Wesco Boss boots. (I don’t wear jeans inside my boots every time I ride my Harley, though from this blog, it may appear that I do.)

When I got to my destination, I carefully backed up into a space on the street among the Harleys owned by fellow club members. Then this guy who was probably about 21 came up to me and said, “Cool! You’re the biker I want to be.” I gave him an incredulous look at first, but then realized he was dead serious. In many ways, he even looked like I did 30 years ago, including having long blond hair.

We talked for quite a while. He had just bought his first bike — a small Suzuki. Turns out that yesterday was his first solo ride, since he just got his motorcycle endorsement on his driver’s license on Friday.

He had tons of questions, and I was happy to try to answer. He told me that he wanted to take a motorcycle training course, but expressed disappointment that the courses he tried to sign up for were all full. I explained the “secret” — that the courses fill fast in April and May, but by June, spaces in the courses begin to open up, and the courses go on all summer. “Oh! Great! Do you teach them?” (Not nowadays, but years ago I did.)

He continued with more question, such as what boots and leathers to get first. He was proud of his first leather item — a traditional biker jacket — but didn’t have anything else. He glanced disapprovingly at his sneakers.

“What boots are you wearing? Where did you get them? Who made your vest? Wow — those patches are cool!” He babbled away, in wonder and awe. I patiently answered his questions, one by one.

I explained why not to buy leather gear from a Harley Dealer (due to the incredible mark-up), but why chaps are probably the first leather item to get after a jacket and boots. I suggested some decent on-line sources for leather gear. I talked boots with him, too, and laughed when he said, “man, you know a lot about boots.” (When a fellow club member heard him say that, he laughed and said, “you don’t know the half of it.”)

My young enthusiast said that he preferred engineer style boots, and said that his budget was about $200. That ruled out a new pair of Wescos. I explained the qualities of Chippewa engineer boots, and he seemed very appreciative of the boot recommendation, as well as the source.

I remember the day when I bought my first pair of biker boots to go with my biker jacket. Then I got my chaps… and after that, more leather gear and boots followed over the years. I wished this guy a great day, and he smiled, shook my hand, and said “thanks, man!” most enthusiastically. I’m glad I made his day. His reaction, questions, and bright, inquisitive demeanor sure made mine! He made me smile, because in him I saw the “me” of years ago.

Life is short: wear your boots! Be a mentor when you can.

Friday Night–Music for Snuggling

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When I get home on Friday evening after the weekly family dinner, my partner is there, waiting for me in our basement media room. I built this room especially for him. He loves to watch HD television and listen to the sound on a 7.1 surround system. This is one way he relaxes when he can’t go outside to our gardens.

A few months ago, we bought an HD Tivo. This most recent product in the Tivo lineup allows recording of HD television shows and has some additional neat features. Since my partner subscribes to Netflix to send DVDs to his mother to keep her entertained, we can access “on demand” movies from Netflix. Occasionally we will watch one on a Saturday or Sunday evening.

But Friday night when I get home is “our snuggle time.” We turn the lights down low, and hold each other close. This isn’t a time to watch some mindless brain-numbing recorded TV show. It’s our time to enjoy sound and share our musical interests with each other.

Often we will queue up some favourite CDs and sit back wrapped in each other’s arms, close our eyes, and drift into dreamspace. However, I recently discovered that this new Tivo can also play videos from YouTube. Lately, instead of listening to a CD, we will search through and play music videos that are available from YouTube. The quality of the sound is terrific and the visual display is great — provided the quality of the original recording is good.

Life is short: hold the one you love close and show him how much you love him.

Bright Side of Life

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Someone asked me in an email, and then someone else asked me on the way home last night… “do you always smile? Doesn’t anything get you down?” Even my brother remarked the other day that I “always have a silly grin on my face.”

Fa, cosi sia! (so be it). I would much rather bring joy to others with a smile. I like to have them say to themselves, “what’s he smiling about?” A smile is contagious. It’s fun. It’s powerful.

Sure, there are a number of things that bother me. I’ve known sadness and sorrow. There are times to mourn, there are times to rant, there are times to wince in pain, but there are also times to smile. I have made smiling such a regular practice that I don’t think about it any more. I just do. I smile so much that people wonder about me. But that’s okay. If I can keep the thoughts on smiling for no other reason than the goodness and joy a smile brings, then I am happy about that.

Many people dwell on the bad things; the lemons that life doles out from time to time. Heck, there are so many people in Washington, DC, who have a permanent scowl on their face, it’s like the scowl came “free” with the purchase of a suit and wingtips. Arrrggh! Bad things happen to all of us. That’s life. Life goes on, and we better make the best of it while we’re here, ’cause life is short.

A few years ago, my partner and I took his mother to see the show Spamalot at a theater in DC. One song that was featured at the closing of the show was the tune, “The Bright Side of Life,” which I have learned was originally introduced in the 1979 Monty Python film The Life of Brian. Not being a Monty Python fan, I wasn’t aware of the tune until I heard it years later. I still sing it to myself from time to time.

Life is short: SMILE! H. Jackson Brown Jr. said, “Today, give a stranger one of your smiles. It might be the only sunshine he sees all day.”

Here are some of the lyrics to the tune “The Bright Side of Life”:

Some things in life are bad,
They can really make you mad,
Other things just make you swear and curse,
When you’re chewing life’s gristle,
Don’t grumble,
Give a whistle
And this’ll help things turn out for the best.
And…

Always look on the bright side of life.
[whistle]
Always look on the light side of life.
[whistle]

If life seems jolly rotten,
There’s something you’ve forgotten,
And that’s to laugh and smile and dance and sing.
When you’re feeling in the dumps,
Don’t be silly chumps.
Just purse your lips and whistle.
That’s the thing.
And…

Always look on the bright side of life.
[whistle]
Always look on the right side of life,
[whistle]

For life is quite absurd
And death’s the final word.
You must always face the curtain with a bow.
Forget about your sin.
Give the audience a grin.
Enjoy it. It’s your last chance, anyhow.

And here’s a YouTube video of it, subtitled in Italian for some of my blog readers che provengono dal paese di origine di mio padre.

Posted in joy

Sheplers Tempts the Bootman

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I wear cowboy boots every day when I go to work and when I’m not on my Harley. I have found that Sheplers, one of the western wear businesses that’s been around for a long time (both in brick-and-mortar stores and on the Internet), is able to get boot manufacturers to offer an exclusive line or style of boots through them, and them alone. You can’t find these boots from competitors (as best I can tell). I also discovered that Sheplers will feature these new styles in their printed catalog (one of the few companies that still prints a catalog) before they will put them on their website.

I received the latest Shepler’s catalog the other day, and as usual, I glanced through it with the full intention of just pitching it in the recycling can, when not one, not two, but three pairs of cowboy boots caught my eye.

What do you think? Which pair should I get, if I break down and get a pair? They’re all nice, and I’d like to have them all but even this Bootman has his limits. Share your opinion: (1) The Nocona Caiman Tail? … or (2) the Lucchese 1883 Full Quill Ostrich? … or (3) the Dan Post Caiman Tail Wingtips? Ugggh… the trials of a Bootman.

Update: Your opinion counted! 11 visitors to this blog voted in an on-line poll that I created, asking for help in making a choice of which boots to get. Six of the votes were for the Lucchese full quill ostrich boots (2 for Nocona Caiman tail, 1 for Dan Post wingtips, and 2 for “none of these.”) Thanks for the input. The order was placed for the Luccheses. I was leaning that way myself, and the votes confirmed my thinking.

Re-Doin’ the Blog – Updated

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Hey, you’ve noticed that the appearance of this blog is quite different. I finally took the plunge to update the template of this blog so that I could use some of the newer features of Blogger. All my stuff is still here, but over the next few days and weeks, you may see some more minor tweaks here and there to colors, fonts, and layouts.

I decided to change the color scheme in a major way, after receiving the third complaint in as many weeks that reading white letters on black background was hard for some to see. That’s gone. Anything else? Let me know.

Update: How do you like the new header? That’s ME! One of the many new features available to me now by updating the Blogger template. Just wait… more to come over time.

A Brother’s Love

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Guest Blog from BHD’s twin brother

I spent a great Easter weekend with that big lovable non-wuss of a brother of mine. Then I attended a series of meetings in Washington for work. I will soon return to Europe where I work and live with my wife.

What my brother’s blog readers do not see is how hard my brother works to care for the world. I’ve said this before, but every time I see it, I remain in awe. Yes, I caught him in a moment of quiet reflection in his back yard on Saturday morning, but it was a rare time when he was caught sitting still. This guy NEVER sits still.

I have not observed anyone who can renovate a house to make affordable housing available to those who work in the public sector while almost simultaneously taking old ladies to the grocery store, help some other seniors compute and send in their quarterly income tax payments, patiently explain to our elderly aunt one more time that her bills are all paid, converse on the phone about shenanigans in local politics, yet … remain calm, reserved, and still have that silly grin on his face.

He is always smiling. Mom always told us that if we scowled long enough that it might remain stuck on our face, so he does the opposite. What a warm feeling I have every time I look at that big, broad, smile on his face. He makes me smile, too.

The little things he does which he nonchalantly says “aren’t a big deal” ARE a big deal. He knows that I have a secret weakness for marshmallow “peeps” — those little sugary Easter treats. I found a peep on my pillow each night (and a whole box of them in my luggage)! I caught him signing and sending birthday cards to several of his friends. He cheats — he buys the cards all at once and puts them in a card organizer, carefully filed by date. But even to think of doing that is an amazing feat, much less carry it out.

I honestly don’t know how he does it all. He tells me that he paces himself. I see that. He’s up well before dawn, but don’t plan anything that goes on past 8 or 9 at night; he just fades out. It was funny last Friday night when he did just that — propped up on a pillow on our sister’s sofa, he was out like a light while everyone else was still loudly chattering away.

It is also evident to me just how deeply he loves his partner. Sure, our siblings are devoted to their spouses, and have remained so over many years. My brother’s devotion, concern, and care for his partner remains as strong as ever, and it’s a great thing to see. He has set the standard that I follow in my relationship with my wife of 20 months (today is our 20-monthiversary!)

I love this big lug of a guy, and thank him for his hospitality, as always. I admire the love he extends to me and to all others for whom he cares. As he says, “life is short! show those you love that you love them.” He is right, and he lives it each day. May God smile on this man, who I am very honored to call my brother.

Reunited In The Shower

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My partner went to see his mother for Easter. He left last Thursday. My twin brother arrived that night, so initially, I was involved in catching up with him, visiting family, and going about my usual routine with grocery shopping for myself and some neighbors, and other mundane tasks.

On Saturday morning, though, I was feeling lonely and a bit melancholy. These feelings washed over me when I awoke at dawn, and did my usual schootch-to-the-right to get close to where my man usually is, but he wasn’t there. It was an subconscious action. I knew he wasn’t there. But I still did that little slide in bed as if he were.

How I missed having his warm body to snuggle close to, and his chest upon which to rest my head. I missed listening to his insights about so many things, to have someone to talk to about our lives, and with whom to be intimate. Someone who above all others, makes me feel warm, safe, and secure.

I got up, got dressed, and went into the kitchen to prepare breakfast. My brother was still sleeping, and the house sounded soooooo quiet. No washer or dryer running, no pounding across the upstairs hallway while clothes were being put away and linens were changed on the bed, no bloop-bloop-a-doop of the Tivo being programmed. I went out to feed the birds and squirrels, and sat on my partner’s bench in the garden. In the rain. In the cold. I was lost in thought about someone I love very much, in one of his favorite places on Earth. (Until my brother called out the back door, “Hey! Are you crazy???” and brought me back to my senses.)

I got busy and carried on with my day, as well as on Sunday, too. I got lots of stuff done, more renovation work completed on the house, more joy shared with family… but nothing feels as empty as your heart when your bed is empty, too.

While I spoke with my partner on the phone a few times while he was away, it’s still not the same. A little catch-up about the mail or that my brother was here (and is a wuss!)… but what I missed is the ongoing banter and interaction through dialogue. It’s just not the same by phone as when your man is by your side.

When I got home from work yesterday, my partner had returned. He had already unpacked, had a load of laundry in the machine, and was taking a shower. I took off my boots, peeled off my work clothes, and stepped into the shower with him. He smiled, we embraced, kissed passionately … and….

Life is short: show those you love that you love them.

How Cold Is Cold?

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While it was sunny yesterday, the predictions for warmer weather were wrong. It was 38°F (3°C) when we went to sunrise mass in the morning, and by 8am, when we were going to get on the Harley to go on our first family visit, it was only 42°F (5.5°C). My brother declined the invitation to join me as a passenger, and I could understand why. The bunny costume wasn’t insulated (LOL!)

We took the truck instead. I left him with a sister while I returned home, leathered up (including my All American Patrol Boots), hopped on the Harley, and joined my club to ride sweep which I had promised to do. My LAPD leather breeches are fully lined, and were warm and comfortable. Several layers of clothing under my Motocross jacket kept me warm on the topside, as well as warm gloves and a full-face helmet.

The ride was great. By the time it was done, I checked the temperature and it wasn’t that much warmer — only 50°F (10°C). I called my brother and he said that he really didn’t want to go on the bike to see our other family. I could understand, but I still called him a wuss. He took it good-naturedly. I took the bike home, changed out of biker leathers into light leather jeans and a long-sleeved shirt, pulled on my Dehner dress-instep patrol boots and pulled the leather jeans down over them, got into the truck and reconnected with my brother. We visited the rest of the family and enjoyed a nice dinner at another sister’s house with her family.

So the bunny surprise didn’t quite happen, but we had fun anyway. And my brother, bless him, is a WUSS! You heard it here first!

Life is short: wear your leather! (so you don’t wuss out on a motorcycle ride on a sunny day, even if it is cold!)