Christmas Checklist

Christmas Day is two days away… here’s my checklist:

  • Home decorated
  • 409 cards sent
  • A fresh loaf of cinnamon raisin bread has been baked and delivered to every neighbor on my street
  • Presents wrapped and under the tree
  • Mother-in-law here
  • Brother and his wife here
  • Daddy Santa is ready to visit on Christmas Eve (evil grin)
  • Turkey and trimmings ready for the big dinner

Well, then, we seem to be ready.

I am ready for the material things, and now I am readying my heart. What’s that? Contemplating, reflecting on the past year, thinking about those whom I love and about whom I care. Thinking of ways that I can help or lend a hand. To me, that’s what Christmas is about: the reason for the season, the spirit of caring, loving, grace, and joy.

Life is short: Keep the faith and keep it focused.

Fun in the Snow

My buddy Clay claims that I’m always out saving the world. No, not really. Okay, during the cleanup from our recent record-breaking snowstorm, my snow blower got more use than it ever has since we have owned it. I’m glad that’s all over.

My partner was able to get out and drive to Pittsburgh to pick up his mother. They return later today. Last night, my twin brother and his wife arrived a bit bedraggled and jet lagged from Europe, but they’re here safely with us and I am looking forward to spending Christmas with him, his wife, my mother-in-law, and of course, my wonderful partner.

Being a Neighbor

Okay call me crazy or a glutton for punishment, but as we continue to dig out from a record-breaking December snowfall, I find that some neighbors need help.

My next-door neighbors are retired, and while they are generally in good health, they are near 80 years old and trying to shovel 21″ (53cm) of snow by hand is too much to do. I have a snow blower, which (once you get the hang of it), makes snow removal fairly easy.

I have another neighbor down the street who is disabled. She has managed to antagonize some of the other neighbors, so no one would even check on her or offer to help.

Well … it is not in me to ignore someone when I know that they may have a need. I called the disabled neighbor on the telephone, and when she didn’t answer, I knocked on her door. She was okay, but as you can imagine, she was daunted by being blocked in by all that snow. Therefore, I used my snowblower and shovel, and soon enough, opened her drive and sidewalks as well.

It wasn’t easy, and I’m sore. But I am not looking for a medal. I am saying that “being a neighbor” means more than just having an address in the same block or building. It means taking time to learn about your neighbors and their needs, and offering to help with skills that you can share.

I get annoyed at the able-bodied yuppies down the street who only care for themselves. Whose children don’t lift a finger (or a shovel) to help out even at their own house, much less at a neighbor’s. The kids have no work ethic, because the parents have not taught it as a value nor demonstrated it by their own actions.

Call me old-fashioned, call me crazy, but whatever you may call me, I hope you call me a good neighbor.

And yeah, after the snow removal was done, I did have a little fun, as demonstrated below.

Life is short: be a good neighbor


Snowy Evening Beauty

My partner and I were entranced at the beauty we beheld last night, admiring the Christmas decorations on our house while the snow continued to fall. I finally am in the Christmas spirit!

This is definitely gonna stick around through Christmas … the first white Christmas we have had in over a decade. As of 9pm last night, we had over 21″ (53cm) of snow. A record for snow in December has been set for the DC area.

And yes, this is the house that I built (with the help of several crews that I hired.) I swung the hammer on many a nail….

Let It Snow!

Afternoon update: as of 4pm local time, we had 17″ (43cm) of snow, and as this photo attests, it is still snowing!!!! My Wesco Combat Boots were on my feet this afternoon!

Why fight it? Just sing after me,

Oh the weather outside is frightful,
But the fire is so delightful,
And since we’ve no place to go,
Let It Snow! Let It Snow! Let It Snow!

It doesn’t show signs of stopping,
And I’ve bought some corn for popping,
The lights are turned way down low,
Let It Snow! Let It Snow! Let It Snow!


Life is short: enjoy it! (As I am now, unbooted and curled up with my hunk, comfy on the sofa.)

Blizzard of ’09

Yep, it’s official. The National Weather Service has issued a blizzard warning for my county and surrounding jurisdictions. It really IS snowing out there. By 9am when my partner and I first went out to see what was going on, we had over 8″ (20cm) of snow, with more than twice that still expected to fall. For this time of year and for the area where we live, this amount of snow is quite unusual.

Concerned that my elderly aunt would be alone and worried about potential power outages, I picked her up and brought her to our house last night to stay for the weekend. My partner was going to leave today to drive to Pittsburgh to pick up his mother and bring her back to stay with us for Christmas, but he postponed his trip. My aunt can stay in the room where his Mom was going to stay until we know that things are safe and she can return to her own home where she lives by herself.

In order to stay on top of things, I began to use the snowblower to remove snow before it got too deep and beyond the capacity of the intake of the machine. In no time, I removed snow from our drive and walks, as well as the drives and walks of three elderly neighbors. It’s just what we do — they take care of us and we take care of them. That’s what being a neighbor means.

BTW, in this photo, I am wearing 18″ Wesco Harness Boots that I bought from my buddy Bamaboy. These boots have seen a lot of abuse, and seem to enjoy it. They kept my feet warm and dry.

Life is short: exercise your responsibilities, exercise your body (such as by blowing snow), and enjoy!

Leather Repair and Alteration

Owning a wearing a vast assortment of leather gear, which I use for motorcycling, comfy gear to wear after work and on weekends, as well as for fetish interests, I am sometimes asked about suggestions on having leather altered or repaired.

Recently I had a zipper installed in my blue leather cop-style shirt and my CHP leather breeches. The shirt fits great, but the snaps over the years became loose and would unsnap all by themselves when I moved while riding my Harley. The CHP breeches, which were a gift, came with the cheapest snaps at the fly, and they always would unsnap (often when I swung my leg over the saddle of my bike.) Not a good thing…

I brought these items to a luggage repair shop. Think about it — most luggage repairs are of zippers on leather. Who better to be able to install a zipper on leather than someone with experience?

Now these items fit great and remain closed where they’re supposed to, and give me flexibility to move without worrying about an indecent exposure arrest (LOL!) The cost was $40 for each item, and I consider it a good investment as I will get much more use out of these pieces of leather gear for years to come.

I have not had many situations where leather has had to be repaired. I take good care of my gear. However, once I got a tear on the side of a pair of leather jeans when the leg got caught on a sharp-edged bolt on my bike. Once again, the luggage repair shop was able to fix it and the results were great.

Some guys require leather to be altered. Hemming to a shorter length is simple. Re-sizing to a larger waist is possible, and sometimes necessary as one ages and gets that “over-30” spread. It is a wise investment to have leather resized if indeed you will get many more years of enjoyment from the initial investment you made in it.

I have tried to have leather alterations done by a tailor, without much success. Tailors are accustomed to doing work on suits and cloth items, not on leather. A luggage repair shop has the equipment and experience to alter leather correctly. Consider it next time you may need work done on leather gear.

Life is short: enjoy it in leather!

One Week

Guest blog by BHD’s twin brother, J

One week, big ‘bro! One week to go until The Big Day!

One day to go back here, then we board our plane and join you! Whoopie!

I can’t wait to show my wife all the cherished memories of our Christmases back home … the ornaments on your tree that we had when we were boys … go caroling in the old neighborhood with our former high school classmates … helping to bake those special Christmas cookies and breads that you make … get the kids in the family all excited with lots of treats and uncle-chasing … the list goes on.

I can’t wait! This is going to be one heck of a fun Christmas, because we will be spending it together. Can you believe it? It’s been TWENTY YEARS since we have had Christmas together. I’m afraid that your partner, his mother, and my wife will think we have gone completely daft. However, that is what is so very special about spending Christmas with your twin brother who is your best friend.

I can’t wait! Woo-hoo! Love you, bro’!

Slogging Through the Crescent City


I just completed a short business trip to New Orleans, the Crescent City. My work was brief — a one day-meeting. It was productive and for the most part, interesting.

At the meeting’s end, I put on my lug-soled Chippewa Firefighter boots, a pair of jeans, and an old comfy sweatshirt and hopped on the trolley. I rode to the location of the local office of my former employer. I visited with a long-time friend who is the CEO. She gave me a tour of their refurbished facility and told me about their work during and after the impact of Hurricane Katrina.

It had rained for three solid days before I arrived and throughout my visit. Over 20″ of rain, with more falling. Water was overtopping but not breeching levies. Localized flooding was everywhere. Man, it was wet! But the spirits were good, and the efforts to help people affected by the current storm and flooding were well underway, well organized, efficient, and calm. Man, it brought me back to the days when I once worked for that organization and helped in such circumstances.

I am home now. I enjoyed the visit, the memories, and seeing the good hearts in action. I am glad I went. I regret that with all the frivolity of the city, that there remains so much sadness under the thin veil of the happy face put on for visitors. Lots more recovery work is needed.

Life is short: support those who help others.

Rules for Wearing Fetish Uniforms

Again, I have observed a recent high number of internet searches ending up on this blog or my website from people entering questions like, “can I wear a uniform in public?” or “how to wear a CHP uniform” or just plain “CHP uniform rules”. This is the third (and last, for the moment) in my series on the “rules” regarding fetish wear.

Rules for Wearing a Uniform

This applies to wearing a uniform by someone who is not an authorized representative (such as by being employed by a law enforcement agency) to wear such a uniform. Some people choose to wear a uniform to fetish events and parties. There remain many questions about impersonation and the legality of wearing a uniform. I cover those questions in much more detail in this blog post about assembling a uniform. Here is a summary of the main points:

1. It is possible, and legal, to put together a replica uniform yourself, as long as you do not wear it anywhere within the jurisdiction it represents. For example, you should not wear a California Highway Patrol uniform anywhere with in the State of California, USA. That’s illegal. Even if the uniform is completely fake, such as one made of all leather. But you can wear it outside of California.

2. By all means, make sure the uniform is clean and pressed, and if worn with boots, the boots are shined. Think about the fine details, such as if the name plate is on the correct side, pins and buttons are in the right places, etc. Try not to overdo the bells and whistles, especially on a duty belt.

3. Do NOT wear a weapon (gun, billy club, police baton.) In many jurisdictions in the United States, it is illegal to wear a weapon like this in public or at a public place like a leather bar. I know some guys who have been arrested for doing that. Do not take this risk!

4. Do not assume behavior while wearing a uniform that implies you are a cop. Impersonation is evaluated on two factors: how you look and what you do. If you try to act like a cop in public, such as by pulling someone over, frisking or handcuffing a “suspect,” interrogating someone, etc., then a real cop may think you are trying to impersonate an officer and take you in for questioning and possibly place you under arrest on criminal charges. Keep the cop-acting behavior behind closed doors.

5. Wear a plain jacket or coat over the uniform shirt so insignia is not visible while seated in a car, using public transit, or walking on the street.

6. Do not wear a full uniform while riding a motorcycle — even if the uniform you are wearing is not from the jurisdiction where you may choose to ride. Think about it: most car drivers only catch a glimpse of other vehicles and their drivers sharing the road with them. If they see something that appears to be a uniformed motor officer on a motorcycle, they will not look more closely to ask themselves, “is he a uniform fetish guy or a real cop?” Instead, they may think you are the real deal because (think about it) most straight people have no clue about the relatively small number of guys who have a uniform fetish. That’s where the line of impersonation gets very fuzzy. Real cops take an extremely dim view of guys who wear uniforms who are not real cops and there are examples of uniform fetish dudes being brought in for questioning, delayed, and even held in jail until things get sorted out. Don’t take that risk. It’s not worth it.

7. It takes some courage to wear a fetish uniform. Stand tall, walk confidently, and remember — nothing is more sexy than a guy in a uniform with a smile. The old sinister sneer drives people away (who would want to talk to someone who looks like he has indigestion?)

These are the “rules” in my opinion, from my experience, and from my perspective. Hope this is helpful to readers!