I’m late this year… I usually have all of my Christmas shopping done by July. I was delayed because I have been spending so much time with my aunt who has required a lot of attention. But she’s better now, and stable. I have arranged 24/7 care for her, so I can attend to other matters.

The last “thing” on my list was birthday and anniversary cards for the families and loved-ones of five special seniors. (I’ve been doing this for a number of years). I buy cards for each of these seniors’ special people, then address the envelopes, put on a “forever” stamp, and insert them in a month-by-month card organizer. It’s a great gift for a senior who can’t really get out to buy cards any more, but who wants to send a card for a loved-ones birthday or anniversary.

For the past two weeks, I bought 186 cards — “birthday, male child; birthday, female child; birthday, adult male; birthday, adult female; anniversary of child’s wedding; daughter-in-law or son-in-law birthday; or a “you’re special” birthday card for a non-relative, but loved person. I sorted, labeled, stamped, and organized all of these cards into card organizer holders for these very special seniors in MY life. With that, my Christmas shopping is DONE!

Note: I didn’t mention my partner. Of course I got him some gifts, but I did that back in April. All done… no stores, no crowds, no “bah-humbug.” Just smiles and cheers of “woo-hoo” ’cause I don’t have to have any Christmas shopping hassles. Yea!

BTW: I guess it’s a “guy thing” that I celebrate not having to do any Christmas shopping. I know it’s not a “gay thing” but as I’ve said before, “I didn’t get those genes.” (LOL!)

Life is short: plan ahead!

One of my banking institutions included this image in a recent email that they sent out to market for new business. The message was about “back to school” and spending money at participating merchants that provide a small bonus to their banking customers (and probably more to the bank for advertising and promotion fees.)

Anyway, isn’t this image sad? Two kids probably about 10 years old, each with their own expensive gizmo-gadgets, smiling away as they spend their parent’s money on monthly fees to support those things? Truly, I find that quite sad.

Back in the day, a dime to call home if we were going to be late was all we needed. Mom and Dad knew where we were all the time, or there would be hell to pay. Today, parents give their kids all these techie toys that cost a lot of money each month in service fees.

Frankly, I was just as happy with two cans and a string.

Life is short: just ask… I am on a first-name basis with dinosaurs, Julius Caesar, and Plato (or is that Pliny the Elder?)

Yesterday was bright, sunny, and the humidity which is prevalent in the DC/Maryland area was non-existent. My mother-in-law is on her way home. The week’s visit wasn’t that bad. I’ll miss my partner, though, as he drove her back to her home and will spend the weekend and return Monday.

The “honey-do” chores are all done, and I have the whole weekend to myself! Woo-hoo! Time for this biker to pull on his boots, leathers, and get out for a ride!

But wait… my heart strings were pulled when I visited my aunt in the morning. There she is, confined indoors when it’s so nice outside. Instead of riding to nowhere just for me, instead, I gently got my aunt into her wheelchair and took her for a walk. Well, let’s say I did the walking, but she enjoyed the outing! There I am in leather jeans, biker boots, and a leather shirt, smiling as I stroll along with my aunt. She’s so sweet. I think the fresh air did her good, and her smile is all I need to warm my heart.

By the time I got back home, I had to do some consulting work and before I knew it, time had flown and it was too late to go for a ride. My priorities changed, but for the good of my aunt’s health, and my own happiness.

Tomorrow, though, this tall-booted leather-wearing guy is definitely going for a ride! It’s about damn time!

Life is short: show those you love that you love them.

The doctor quickly felt my forehead, and re-read the blood pressure results … 91/54. “Are you alive?” She looked at me with grave concern.

This happened actually while on a visit to the doctor with my aunt. I have had to take her to weekly follow-up visits with her regular physician. It’s quite an ordeal, as my aunt can barely walk, yet we have to navigate six steps to get her out of her building and into a wheelchair. Once in the chair, then we take her to a car, then transfer her into it, then go to the doctor’s office on the other side of her complex.

Yesterday, the doctor wanted to know my aunt’s blood pressure. As the tech was preparing to wrap the blood pressure cuff around my aunt’s arm, my aunt reacted with alarm, “what’s that???” I reassured her that it’s nothing new, nothing strange, and wouldn’t hurt. My aunt was still dubious. (Damn Alzheimer’s… my aunt forgot what is done to measure blood pressure.)

So I stuck out my arm and asked the tech to take my blood pressure, so I could show my aunt that it doesn’t hurt. The tech complied, and the result showed on the screen of the blood pressure device just as the doctor walked into the room. I explained what I had done. The doctor glanced at the results, and then asked, “are you alive?”

For men of my height, age, and size, such a blood pressure reading is considered to be borderline “low.” I do not quite know why my BP is so low, but it’s better that way than being high, which requires medical attention, medication, and can lead to a variety of other problems.

I guess having a low BP enables me to remain calm when others get upset and angry. It takes quite a bit to get me upset. I have been angry, but when I am upset, I do not yell, scream, or throw temper tantrums. I write. I write and write and write. I direct my anger to its source. That seems to keep me calm. I do not know why.

Nonetheless, the doctor advised me to see my regular physician as a follow-up. I may — or may not — as my last full physical was just a couple months ago and I’m okay, including my BP. My doc knows that I have borderline low BP and hasn’t asked me to change anything, but to keep an eye on potential symptoms. I only have one of those symptoms, which I won’t mention, but is manageable.

Anyway, I got a big laugh when the doctor asked me about how I was feeling, and if I were alive, as an outcome of reading my blood pressure. Yeah, I affirm, I’m fine. Calm, cool, collected….

Life is short: what’s your B.P.?

Yesterday, the heat index where I live was 105°F (40.5°C). Today, it is projected to be as high as 115°F (46°C). This is just ridiculous. Who says there’s no global warming? Oh yeah, right, you read my posts during our relentless, patience-wearing, Snowpocalypse II and its earlier brother, the Blizzard of ’09.

I had to go see my aunt yesterday, and did something that I rarely do: I drove my truck and kept the AC on. I rarely use the AC in my truck, and when it’s dry and sunny, I prefer to ride my motorcycle. But it was just way too hot to sit on a heat-producing bike in jeans and boots.

I did wear boots yesterday when I went out, but wore short Chip Bombers that are loose and lightweight. I have to be honest, though, as soon as I got home, I got naked. Yep, I stripped off all of my sweaty clothes, put them in the wash, and didn’t put any other clothing (or boots) on for the rest of the day.

Yeah, I have AC in my house, but I chose not to turn it on. I stayed in the basement most of the time where it is naturally very cool. I also prepared some home-cooked meals that keep well. This was in advance of our annual summer visit by the mother-in-law, who arrives later today. Oh, joy… but that’s another story.

I relented and turned the AC on about 7pm so it would be cool enough to sleep on the bedroom level (upper floor) by the time I went to bed at 8:30pm.

BTW, in case you were wondering, my partner left yesterday morning to drive to his mother’s home in da’ ‘burgh, and bring her back today. Oh, joy.

Meanwhile, it was kinda fun being alone… naked… and working at the computer, catching up on some reading of professional journals on-line, answering backlogged email, and not having to do anything other than what I wanted to do.

Well, I wanted to make a video as I had some time, but I am totally out of video ideas, and it was too hot to make one outside, anyway. Oh well, perhaps someone will give me an idea for a video that isn’t too strange, impossible, or difficult to do alone. My partner will take his mother back home at the end of next week, so I’ll have another day to myself when she’s gone to do some video work, if I can think of something, and hopefully, the weather will be more cooperative.

Life is short: it’s also too hot, sometimes.

I’m taking a brief aside in this post, to discuss matters related to community advocacy and action. Most long-term readers of this blog have noted that I engage from time to time in activities that benefit the neighborhood, community, county, and state where I live. (I didn’t mention “city” because I do not live within the boundaries of an incorporated city.)

Most of my engagement is by bringing people together to discuss issues of concern — from crowded roads, to public safety, to zoning for development, to density of growth (planned or unplanned), to environmental concerns, and so forth.

One does not have to have a degree in political science or have served in public office to do this type of work. Being able to work with people, to listen, to learn and to study, and to be patient are key requirements. In order to be effective at advocating about issues, raising concerns, and making your community a little bit better, I have found the following activities helpful to achieve success:

1. Find out who else in the area has similar concerns. Bring them together at a meeting. (Offer food at the meeting, and get better attendance.) Try to achieve consensus or agreement among your neighbors about the issue. Your message is much more powerful if you can say, “WE (emphasis added) all agree on this…”.

2. Accept the fact that everyone does not think the same way you do. Listen, listen, listen. Hear what other people have to say and seek out the input and advice from those you think may oppose you. Yeah, that’s right: you have to hear what “the other side says” so you can have a better grasp of the issue from all points of view, even if you disagree with it.

3. Do your homework. It is highly unlikely that the issue about which you are concerned is brand new. It is more likely that the issue has been reviewed, debated, and discussed in the past. Find past public records, archived newspaper articles, and people who were around “back then” and learn the history. There is a lot of “re-inventing the wheel” that goes on in public advocacy that doesn’t have to.

4. Try working with and through staff first. That is, before you fire off a letter to your State Senator or County Commissioner, my advice is to find the administrative department that is responsible for the issue and make some phone calls. Ask questions. Perhaps they have already resolved the matter yet haven’t implemented it yet. Give the staff a chance to explain positions and situations first, before running amok and sending letters that ultimately get turned over to staff anyway. Usually, staff know about specific matters more thoroughly and can answer questions directly rather than going through an intermediary, such as an elected official.

5. Keep the issue within the correct level of responsibility. For example, if you are concerned about a state road, then you have to bring your issue to the correct department at the state level, not your local city or county transportation department, or your local elected officials. They will all say the same thing: “not my job.” I can’t tell you how many times I have advised colleagues not to go to the county about such-and-such an issue because it’s a state matter, or vice-versa. So much time is wasted that way. Find the right place to go first, rather than spin wheels and get turned away because the person you’re asking literally cannot help.

6. If you run into red tape, push-back, recalcitrance, excuses, or other lame fall-deroll from staff about an important issue, then it’s time to approach elected officials. Begin by finding out which elected official serves your district (where you live), or serves at-large. You will probably find multiple elected officials who serve you (usually one or two for your residential district, and all “at-large.”) To refine the list further, look for information about which committees these officials serve. For example, if you have a transportation issue, then ideally the best elected official with whom to communicate is a representative who serves your district (or at-large) and serves on the Transportation Committee. Think about it, if your district rep serves on the Education committee, then he/she won’t be as much help.

7. Again, before you fire off that letter or make that phone call demanding to speak only to the elected official, instead, ask to speak with the staff person in the elected official’s office who deals with that issue. It is not widely recognized, but most elected officials, even at the city and county level, have staff who specialize in certain matters. One person may handle schools and public safety, while another handles development and transportation. Call the elected representative’s staff first! I betcha they have already dealt with the matter, and may have information and answers — all available just for the asking.

8. If the elected officials’ staff don’t have the answers you seek or if the elected official is considering a position on the matter before a vote, then by all means, ask to speak with that official. And yes, I mean “speak” as in “talk to.” Don’t just write a letter and think you’re done with it. Communicate with the official in person or by phone. It never ceases to amaze me how often local elected officials tell me that the public seems to be afraid to talk to them, so they don’t always know what people want or are thinking. Look at it this way: you (and your neighbors) voted in the last election which put these people into office. Even if you didn’t vote for that person, nonetheless, they are serving in public office and therefore represent you. Communicate with your representatives. It is your civic duty and their responsibility to communicate with constituents.

9. Follow-up verbal communications with a polite letter saying “it was nice to speak with you on (date) about (subject). Here is what we agreed on (item, item, item). Thank you for your support.” Confirm it in writing. Elected officials communicate with hundreds of people each day. Unless they know you personally, it is not likely they will remember your name or the specific conversation when a vote comes up. But they will remember better if they have something in writing to refer to.

10. Whenever a major issue may be considered by a body politic, they will hold public hearings. Find out the schedule of the hearing and plan to attend. Get on the schedule to testify. You do not need to be a registered lobbyist to testify at a public hearing! I am not a lobbyist, but I testify often. Why? I care. I prepare by writing down what I want to say. I find out if there are limits to the amount of time allowed for testimony. Usually, it’s 3, 5, or 10 minutes. Write it all out, then “present” it to your neighbors, family, friends, or anyone who will listen. Use their input to refine your points and get it to be within the time limit. Then go say your piece, and provide written copies of your testimony so it can be part of the record.

11. Follow-up, in writing. Write a short, polite, letter to each person who heard your testimony thanking them for their time and their service, and for listening to what you have to say. Even if you think they may vote contrary to your position, you will be considered highly among the officials and their staff by paying attention to details like this. Believe me, written follow-up doesn’t happen often, and when it does, it makes an impact.

12. Avoid veiled threats such as “you will lose my vote in the next election if….” or “I’ll tell all my friends what a loser you are if you don’t vote the way I want you to.” Elected officials have heard that before and will hear it again, and have learned not to pay attention to such threats. Making such threats doesn’t help, and often hurts by damaging a relationship with someone elected to serve (even if their position isn’t yours).

13. If a vote doesn’t turn out the way you want, continue your advocacy by collecting information on what the impact of that decision has had on “real people” — your neighbors, and those who are the constituents of those elected officials. Provide that feedback to the elected officials. Again, “impact statements” are seldom received. Most people think “what’s done is done” and it’s all over. Believe me, it isn’t. If you don’t like how something turned out, it can be changed. You just have to continue to pursue it and share information persistently. I have a record of getting some positions reversed simply by collecting and providing those “impact statements.”

14. Finally, be patient. The wheels of local, state, and federal government turn very slowly. Most people give up, and that’s something that elected officials expect. Those who persist and continue to fight for what’s right eventually see a positive result. For example, I fought for eight years to get a bill passed in my home state to prohibit the use of hand-held cell phones while operating a motor vehicle. The bill finally passed, although watered down, in 2010. My next work on this issue will be to strengthen the bill. I haven’t stopped my advocacy just because a nudge in the right direction finally happened.

Well, enough for now. Advocacy, community action, service … call it what you will. It’s not rocket science, but is the fundamental right of an engaged, Democratic Society. This is why I love America. Right or wrong, we can all engage and have our voices heard.

Life is short: engage!

I had a number of errands to run yesterday and consolidated the visits to stores along a busy roadway, “the pike.” I was riding my Harley, as usual, on a warm summer’s day.

I was dressed in typical “biker attire” — Wrangler jeans, Chippewa engineer boots (pants over), and a Harley t-shirt. It was way too hot to wear leather (other than my boots.)

One of the things I was doing was making sure that changes I had made to the bike all worked. I was given a gift card from my former employer, and decided to buy a back rest for my Harley with it. I installed the back rest on Sunday, and it works great. I also relocated my GPS, and found a way to connect its audio output to the bike’s audio input for my CB radio, which connects to two little speakers inside my helmet. So now I can hear the GPS-lady yelling, “recalculating” as I make (yet) another wrong turn. LOL!

Anyway, I pulled into a parking lot at a store and parked. A guy about my age was getting into a panel truck that was parked in the space next to me.

He looked at my bike, and said, “it must be nice.” I didn’t say anything, and he continued, “you guys here in [snoburbia] have it all — time off during the day to ride your big-ass Harley wherever you please. It must be nice.”

He wasn’t the kind of guy with whom to get into a discussion. It was obvious from the tone of his voice that he was jealous, or at least unhappy, that he had to work and drive an old beat-up truck and I show up on my nice shiny Harley.

Well, you know, I worked for my bike. Every penny I paid for it was earned by my own work. I didn’t take out a loan. I saved for years to have enough money to pay cash for the bike when I was ready to get it. So yeah, it IS nice, but is the fruit of my labors. I don’t travel (for fun), I don’t even go on vacations. I don’t eat out. I am really rather conservative with my cash. Even though right now I am “between jobs,” I have saved sufficiently to live my usual life. I don’t depend on my partner to cover my share of our expenses while I’m not working. I saved, invested, and have carefully managed my money.

I realize that this guy probably has worked hard all of his life, too, and may have kids to feed and a mortgage to pay and taxes and bills, etc., etc. I have expenses too. I’ve been fortunate to plan and to save and to be financially prudent so I can have at least one “thing” that cost a fair amount of money. Okay, so be it. “It must be nice.” Yep.

Life is short: enjoy the fruits of your labor.

I went to a meeting yesterday morning, then checked in on my aunt, but as soon as I got home (about 11:30), my partner and I got busy on more projects. Work-work-work, but we were productive.

We ordered a new sofa for our family room a couple weeks ago. It will be delivered in another week or two. Meanwhile, the delivery service does not remove old furniture, and it was in such bad shape it wasn’t suitable to donate to charity. (It was literally falling apart.) Being the frugal sort that we are, we didn’t want to pay someone to pick up our old sleep sofa that the new one will replace. Instead, we dismantled it, and I used my power saw to break it down into smaller pieces so it would all fit into my truck so we could take it to the transfer station (most people call it “the dump,” but in snoburbia where we live, we call it a “transfer station.”)

Thank goodness I had the foresight to bring the sofa outside before cutting it apart. When I used the saw on it, the stuffing inside the seat and back started to come out. Small yellow clumps of sofa stuffing started blowing everywhere. We were able to contain most of it, but I sure am glad we didn’t have the sofa disintegrate inside the house, or it sure would have been a mess to clean up.

We got the sofa taken completely apart and stuffed into the back of my truck, and off we went to the transfer station. It was amusing, and perhaps reminiscent of an old I Love Lucy episode, because some of the stuffing was flying out the windows of the truck as we were driving down the road.

Anyway, we got it unloaded fairly easily. We were sweating like crazy, so we decided to take a shower when we arrived home. We enjoyed our two-headed, two-man shower. Ahhh…

Life is short: enjoy the benefits of your labor.

“DIY” means “do it yourself.” I’m that kind of guy. I do a lot of construction and repair work myself. I’m pretty handy at carpentry and electrical trades, and haven’t (yet) caused a flood from plumbing work.

Lately, I have been diligently knocking off items on my partner’s famous “honey-do list.” What’s that? “Honey, since you’re off work, do this, do that….” That’s the list to which I referred in yesterday’s post.

I have repaired one of our decks, by removing old, rotted boards and replacing them with a wood composite product. Each new board has to be precisely cut to fit its location. Lots of bending, lifting, sawing, screwing, etc.

I replaced a roof over a porch on one of my rental properties. I installed new windows on the first floor of another rental house. I repaired some leaky plumbing in yet another.

All-in-all, when I am not spending time with my aunt, I am working. Despite the heat. Despite the physical discomfort.

The side benefit of all this work is that in the last six weeks, I have lost 22 pounds — without even trying. This exercise helps a lot. Plus, I continue taking hour+ walks every morning, and swimming 50 – 75 laps on both Saturday and Sunday mornings. That, and I am in better control of what I eat, as far as foods that put on pounds. And with all the heat, I am drinking A LOT of water, so the weight-loss isn’t all water-weight. In fact, if I were not so “well hydrated,” I probably would weigh even less.

My jeans are riding much lower on my waist. My boots don’t feel as tight on my legs. My jowls don’t appear as pudgy. Though my mid-section needs to loose more, at least what I am losing seems to be evenly distributed, and not from the areas that don’t count (face and legs.)

I do not tolerate lectures about “healthy eating, diet, and exercise.” I know all that. What’s “healthy eating” to many is not so healthy for me, due to a chronic condition that I have. I can’t eat most vegetables or fruits, so what’s left makes it harder to choose foods that also aren’t loaded with calories. But I’m trying… and that’s the best I can say.

Life is short: when tired and sore from doing repair work, try to remember the “side benefits” of DIY.