Travel Planning

Posted on October 7, 2011 by BHD

After a summer without any business travel, the travel calendar is getting kinda busy for ol’ travel-hardened BHD.

Seattle beckons me again — for a whole week! This time, to facilitate a meeting. It’s something I do, something I enjoy, yet is draining. Nonetheless, I look forward to returning to Seattle again; second time this year, in mid-October.

In mid-November, I am leading a major session at a professional conference in Las Vegas. I really get jazzed when I have a chance to do public speaking — and before several thousand people, it becomes quite the “energizer!” Personally, I don’t like Vegas. I don’t gamble and am not interested in the night life. But I will look forward to seeing hundreds of colleagues and friends while I’m there in mid-November.

Mid-December will see me make that trip I have written about before. To the farthest-flung U.S. Commonwealth way out in the Pacific. I will be doing some training, participating in meetings, and getting to know people with whom I have only communicated via email. I look forward to it — and while I have been there before, this will be the first time that I am not going there to pick up the pieces after a severe storm wiped out all of the infrastructure. On my return, I look forward to stopping off on Guam and then Hawaii for more meetings and to decompress.

Too bad my partner is unable to travel. I would love to have him with me. Alas, he will keep the home fires burning while I’m firing up a storm in the western parts of the United States, its commonwealths and territories.

Have I said recently, “I love my job?”

Life is short: show your passion!

Can A Masculine Man Be Gay?

Posted on October 6, 2011 by BHD

Yep, it continues — the ongoing queries entered into search engines about masculine men and sexual orientation. Here is one of the latest searches:

This is yet a different twist on the age-old question that directs many visitors to this blog. “Can a masculine man “still” be gay?”

Simple answer is, “yes.” Masculine traits vary for each man. Some men are hyper-masculine — some have a very deep voice, lots of facial hair, are muscular, and walk with a kind of a swagger. There are other types of masculine men who do not display all of the most obvious (and perhaps “looked-for”) masculine behaviors. What I am saying is, it is a range.

Gay men display various behaviors that range from a few on the hyper-masculine end of the scale to a few on the hyper-effeminate end of the scale, with the scale “tilted” if you will toward gay men being a bit more effeminate than masculine in their behavior. But most gay guys are in the middle, displaying both characteristics of a masculine man as well as some softer behaviors which some people might characterize as being effeminate.

Trouble is, many television shows that include gay characters have those characters display the most “queeny,” effeminate behaviors. So the media causes many people to believe that all gay men are frilly-froo-froo effeminate queens.

That’s not the case. Just as there are gay men who are effeminate, there are gay men who look, act, and behave like any other guy. However, you won’t see him making out with a woman, enjoying himself at a (straight) strip club, or oogling women on the street. But you may indeed see him at a local sports bar cheering on the local team, or playing sports himself in a recreational league, or riding a motorcycle, sailing a boat, chasing children on a playground (e.g., being an uncle), or a zillion other things that guys do.

So the answer to this query again remains, “yes, a masculine man can be gay.” The thing is, he’s probably very good at hiding his sexual orientation.

For more on this topic, see some past posts on this blog.

Life is short: be who you are.

Budgeting for Boots or Leather Gear

Posted on October 5, 2011 by BHD

Some people have commented from time to time about the size of my boot collection and the variety of leather gear that I have. I wear the boots and the leather regularly. I have been asked about the budget required to acquire the boots and gear.

First off, I should note that I have owned some pairs of boots for over 35 years. The boots and gear have been acquired over a long, long time. These items are not something that I went out and purchased entirely at one time.

I operate on one simple philosophy: I only buy what I can afford, and do not extend myself on credit. That’s right — I never carry a balance on a credit card.

How do I do it? I have a budget. Yep, a plain, old-fashioned plan for where my income will be allocated toward expenses.

The first person I pay with each paycheck is myself. I put 20% of my net income into savings. I divide the savings into 75% that I can’t touch until retirement, and 25% into my “rainy day” fund. I have figured out how much money I would need to live on to cover costs for my home, vehicles, food, utilities, and other regular expenses. I have 12 months-worth of savings in this “rainy-day” account that, if needed, I can use to cover a major, unplanned expense. That expense may be something like having to pay the deductible on my auto insurance in case I get into a wreck, up to and including losing my job. I have enough money saved that I could withstand — not to my liking mind you — losing my primary source of income by losing my job and still survive for at least 12 months without another paycheck. Not that I plan to get laid off or fired, but I have left jobs without another job lined up twice in my life, so I know what it’s like to have ongoing expenses without income, and still need to keep a roof over my head and food on the table.

I then allocate the remainder of my net income across expenses. My share of our home’s mortgage, utilities, and groceries. I include in my allocations the costs to own, maintain, and operate a cage (4-wheeled vehicle) and a Harley — not cheap! I also allocate a small amount toward what I call my “boot fund” which is really a small savings account that I tap into when I want to buy boots or leather gear or buy other things that I want — but do not “need.”

Some people have various amounts available after major expenses are paid. But even saving US$10/month can add up.

I also work pretty hard at preventing (or reducing) expenses that can suck my bank account dry in a hurry. I don’t, for example, pay for pay channels on television (such as HBO, etc.) I do not subscribe to a data plan for wireless services, so I do not pay the monthly ransom demanded by the wireless “providers” who charge such outrageous monthly fees. I walk at lunchtime and around my neighborhood — instead of paying for a gym membership. Since I do not carry a balance on credit cards, I do not have to pay what is essentially “debt service” — that is, paying someone else for your own money. Also, I pack a lunch that I bring to work and prepare our other meals at home, each and every day. Avoiding going out to eat except on rare occasions saves me about US$5,000 each year (I calculated that based on eating lunch out 4 days/week and dinner out 3 days/week, which is about average for my fellow residents here in Snoburbia, and offsetting that with the cost of buying more groceries instead).

You do not have to make it more complicated than it really is. Just employ the lessons that those who lived through The Great Depression learned, and taught me: save money for a rainy day and for your future; be a good steward of your money so you can pay your bills and not get upside down (that is, owe more than you take in); then, and only then, allocate funds toward purchase of “wants” vs. “needs.”

This is another reason why my partner and I are so closely synced — we think about finances exactly the same way. Some may call us “financially stable” while others may call us “cheap.” The thing is, we are able to cover our living expenses, reduce expenses that are financially draining, save for retirement and unplanned major expenses, and still have money left over to enjoy things — like our hobbies, interests, and activities. (One thing that many couples fight about is money. Thankfully, that has never been an issue with us!)

My philosophy on finances was best quoted by a dear friend in an email that I received yesterday: when there is something pricey you really want to do or someone you really want to help, the money is there. And when the economy tanks, you have the funds to ride the tide … comfortably.

It’s all about that “B-word.” Budget. Figure out how much it costs to live, see what you can eliminate from reviewing where you are spending your money and don’t really have to, and saving for a rainy day.

Life is short: live it well by budgeting.

Chippewa or Frye Harness Boots?

Posted on October 4, 2011 by BHD

Recently, someone sent me an email asking about the current boots made under the Frye boots label. He noted that a new pair of Frye 12R harness boots were already falling apart after just one wearing. One boot pull was not sewn on completely and was coming off.

His original question was whether those Frye boots are really made in the United States, despite the label saying, “made in the U.S.A.”

I replied by saying that yes, the boots are assembled (“made”) in the USA at a plant in Arkansas, in a location that Frye will not tell you where it is (which adds to the suspicion.) However, I assert, unless the owner can prove otherwise, that the leather and other materials from which these boots are assembled comes from inferior sources outside the U.S. Further, because the current owner of the Frye boot label is the Chinese company Li and Fung, known for producing the cheap clothing and footwear imported by Walmart, the boots are assembled by non-union labor using inferior lasts (boot forms) that were not from the original John A. Frye Company.

Current Frye harness boots have a cheap off-brand rubber sole. Further, you can see from this image from Frye’s website that they imprint a pebble grain on the boots to hide blemishes that otherwise would be noticed if the leather were smooth. That is a way to hide that the leather is not Top Grain, the best leather for boots.

I assert, then, that today’s Frye boots are cheaply made from inferior materials. While the going price for a pair of these boots is about US$300, the company and all the middle-men involved are making a huge profit from the well-recognized name, and are not purchasing quality materials to go into the boots in the first place. This is definitely where the adage caveat emptor (buyer beware) applies.

Chippewa harness boots are a fair comparison in today’s harness boot styles. The Chippewa company is owned by another conglomerate, Berkshire Hathaway. (Actually, the U.S.-based Berkshire Hathaway owns Justin Brands, of which the Chippewa label is a subsidiary.)

However, in my humble opinion, Chippewa boots are made better. They still use the same lasts (boot forms) for their boots that they used before the company was bought out by Justin Brands. The boots are still made in the USA. From my direct observations of the materials and craftsmanship with which Chippewa boots are made, I feel that they leather and materials that they use to make Chippewa boots is of better quality. The boots are made of smooth leather. Blemishes are not observable. Double-stitching is used on stress points, including the boot pulls. Quality Vibram soles are used, which are far superior for a biker’s required traction (and will last long.)

And Chippewa sells a pair of their “Street Warrior” model 27868 harness boots for about $100 less per pair than Frye. Go figure — are you getting what you are paying for with Frye? I don’t think so. You are paying for a label, not quality.

Just because boots are made in the USA does not mean that they are all made with quality materials and craftsmanship. Look closely and compare, and be a well-informed consumer.

Life is short: do your research before making a purchase.

A Closed Relationship

Posted on October 2, 2011 by BHD

I read often on various gay forums, blogs, and fetish sites about gay guys who have an “open” relationship. To them, it is okay to “play around” (i.e., have sex) with men other than their partner. That is how they live their respective lives and understand their relationship to be.

I have a rather strong opinion that such relationships do not work for the long term, but who am I to judge — a guy who is for all intents and purposes, monogamously married.

The common marriage vow expresses a couple’s relationship to each other “to have and to hold, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do us part.”

I know that is rather hokey in today’s society, but I have to say that this is exactly how my partner and I feel about each other. We live by the meaning of that vow even though the law does not allow us to express it to each other formally and have it be recognized by the state.

We have a “closed” relationship. We love each other without question, without judgment, and without reservation. I almost said, “without condition” but I have to say that there are indeed some conditions. We didn’t put these conditions in writing; rather, we obey the tenets of the conditions by what we do (or don’t do.) We must remain honest with each other. We will strongly protect the other as best we can. We must communicate with one another clearly and meaningfully without using words that can be hurtful. We must respect each other and show that respect by our behavior.

These are the conditions of our relationship, and we are proud of it.

And notice in all that I said above, I have not yet said anything about sex. Another important “condition” of our relationship is that we remain faithful in a sexual way to the other.

There are some who believe that it is okay “just to have sex” as a casual fling, but since “it’s just sex” then it cannot (or should not) cause problems in a couple’s relationship. To my partner and me, though, sex is a part of our intimate relationship that we hold dearly and sacred. That’s why neither one of us would consider having “just sex” with someone else. It is not “just” anything — in our opinion, sex with someone else would destroy the most intimate relationship that we have and break our bond of trust.

I realize that many gay couples struggle with maintaining monogamy. Some have said to me, “hey, we’re not married; we have no Contract in the eyes of God.” That may be true, but in our opinion, we have a contract to remain true, faithful, and honest with each other.

I have to say, that is one reason why we have been together for over 18 years, and plan on being a couple in love (as well as “in like”) with each other until we die.

Life is short: maintain trust through personal integrity.

Boot Heel Plates Squeak?

Posted on October 1, 2011 by BHD

A friend sent me a question asking how to stop (or reduce) severe cowboy boot heel squeaking that he was hearing.

Most cowboy boot heels have a thin rubber plate attached to the bottom. This rubber plate can easily pick up oil from a surface that you walk on. Even if the surface doesn’t look oily, it’s possible that some type of oil may be on a roadway, sidewalk, or even a linoleum floor, for that matter. Oil from what you walk on forms a thin film on the rubber plate on the bottom of boot heels. Then you hear a very annoying noise — squeak, squeak, squeak, when you walk.

It does not take much oil to cause an interaction between the rubber and certain flooring products such as tile, hardwood, or other finished surfaces. The interaction results in that annoying squeaky noise.

To get rid of the noise (or reduce it), try this simple and inexpensive home remedy:

1. Find an old toothbrush or any form of small bristle-brush.

2. Pour a little bit of laundry detergent — the best type to use is the powder form — into a small, flat-bottomed, container (dish or bowl.)

3. Drop a few drops of water onto the detergent and mix it with the brush, so you have a paste. It really doesn’t have to be any certain consistency. I’m just saying that a paste works better than a liquid.

4. Using the old toothbrush, rub the detergent paste across the bottom of the rubber heel plate. You do not need to create a bubbly foam. What you are doing is using detergent to break down the oil. That’s what detergent does (and much better that regular soap, so that’s why you should go for the laundry stuff instead of the dishwashing stuff.)

5. Once you have brushed/scrubbed the heel plate with the detergent paste, then rinse the heel plate with water. Remove all residual of the detergent.

6. Let the boot heel plate dry in a well-ventilated area but not in direct sunlight.

Once the boot heel plates are dry, pull your boots on again and see if the squeak is gone.

If you still hear squeaking, then the noise is probably coming from the boot itself, not the heel plate. That’s a topic for an entirely different blog post.

Life is short — hear a good solid cowboy boot heel clunk, not squeak-squeak-squeak!

Basic Grammar

Posted on September 30, 2011 by BHD

I continue to be appalled at people who grew up in the United States and who write with the most fundamental errors in grammar, spelling, and punctuation.

Here is a snippet of a message that I received the other day:

I bought a Beautiful Pair of Old Gringo All Leather Cowboy Boot’s With Wooden Peg’s Through The Sole’s Great Quality Cowboy Boot’s.

And from the same author, another in a follow-up:

Hey dude, I love your cowboy boots there the bomb!

Here is another:

U R good to lern from.

Here is another:

I think, that, you should, create, another video.

Oh please… come on, folks! I am accepting and understanding when English is not a primary language, so I do not criticize messages that I receive from people who live in other countries where English is not the primary language. I recognize that many of these people are trying to communicate with me in my language because I may not understand their language.

However, each of the above examples came from people who identified themselves to be from the United States. I have no clue why someone would capitalize the first letter of every word in a sentence and use an apostrophe before each “s” to make a word plural. The plural of boot is boots. That’s it. The only time one may use an apostrophe with that word is in this example, “the left boot’s heel needs repair.” Apostrophe “s” is used to indicate a possessive — such as the boot’s heel.

Do NOT get me started on how many people do not understand the differences between “there” (designation of place), “their” (designation of plural ownership), and “they’re” (contraction of “they are.”) These words are used incorrectly all the time! Arrrgggh!

Abbreviations through text-speak, such as “U R” drive me crazy, but for purposes of keeping a message shorter, it is understandable. However, if writing a message for email, please spell out these short words. Do NOT use the single-letter abbreviations just because you usually communicate via text message. Some of us do not.

And finally, one does NOT use a comma when taking a breath. Seriously — a comma after every two words? Really? Oh brother…. if in doubt, leave the comma out.

Okay, end-of-rant. I cannot anticipate that everyone may communicate using the language and skills of a college graduate, but I do expect U.S.-educated residents to employ the most fundamental of grammar, spelling, and punctuation skills. Is that too much to ask?

Life is short: Write right!

Viewership: Zing!

Posted on September 29, 2011 by BHD

It is not surprising to me, but I remain amazed at the sheer volume of interest in my motorcycle police galleries that I posted on a photo gallery software system on my website.

I announced it on this blog, and probably had a few hundred visitors come from here.

I announced it in the “what’s new” section of my website, and also saw a few hundred visitors originate from there.

Google is bringing lots of visitors, too. Amazing how quickly Google indexes this blog with its search engine, and sends people searching “motorcycle cops” and related key words to that gallery.

I announced it on the “Boots on Line” board on hotboots.com, and man, oh man, the “visitorship” went … zing! Not a minute after I posted a message there, someone from from my home town immediately followed that link to check it out. (Hmmm… interesting… another follower of hotboots.com where I live? Well, I’m glad there is at least one other Bootman besides me in my hometown where boots are rarely worn except by real bikers.)

Throughout the day, hundreds and hundreds of visitors explored that gallery. By 5pm yesterday, my website logged the highest number of visitors and viewership it has ever had in one 12-hour period — over 20,000 page views. Wow! All that in just a half day!

Well, I’m glad there is so much interest in those galleries. And if you are among those who have gotten tired about the prattling I have done about cops, boots, and this gallery, this blog will resume with a different line of thought tomorrow.

Life is short: enjoy the view!

New Way of Showing Cop Galleries

Posted on September 28, 2011 by BHD

Over the last several evenings, I have been experimenting with using a new-to-me software tool that allows for easier management of photo galleries on my website.

I think it is working — Check it out to see the galleries from the recent Police Motorcycle Competition that I attended last weekend.

I have had a recently retired cop friend check it out for me. He has nothing to do but ride his Harley and give me grief (using his witty charm) by sending ransom demands. He and another local cop who I have known since grade school both said that the new gallery seems to work for them. Yea! It will take time to integrate it throughout my website, but I’ve done a quick-n-dirty redirect to make it “go live” already.

Life is short: use new products that can help make life easier (especially if they’re free! Thanks, Coppermine!)

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