It was rainy and wet yesterday, and I worked from home. Today (Saturday), it’s clearing. Riding on the roads after such weather causes “SNUD” — Snow/Mud combination. Kinda fun sometimes just to get off the bike and walk around….
My old Chippewa Oil-Tanned Engineer Boots fill the bill. Comfy old boots that have been everywhere and have done everything, including tramping in some SNUD. Now, time to clean the Harley….
There is a common assumption among many in the gay world that all men who enjoy leather also always are into BDSM (Bondage, Discipline, and Sado-Mascochism, sometimes referred to SM or S&M). According to Wikipedia, BDSM “defines a spectrum of behaviors, including dominance, submission, punishment, masochism, bondage, role play, and a large variety of other activities, frequently sexual in nature.“
And while it’s true that many men who are into BDSM are into leather and uniforms which fulfill their role playing for such activities, I contend that it is not true the other way around: not all men who are into leather are into BDSM. Many guys into BDSM use leather products, such as restraints, collars, whips, paddles, and similar items as part of their sex play. Some who enjoy BDSM have told me that they get much more of a sexual charge in certain “SM scenes”. I’ll leave it at that; this is a G-rated Blog.
As for me, I have witnessed actual torture in some parts of the world. I have observed man’s inhumanity to man. It was dreadful, frightening, and I felt woefully deficient and horrible if I couldn’t put a stop to it. What I saw was so repugnant and horrifying that I had nightmares for years following. I tried to help those who were tortured recover from their wounds, both physical and mental, and my “mental wounds” will never go away.
Because of my own experience, I could not consider engaging in BDSM activities, nor would I find it interesting, “fun,” or sexually stimulating. In fact, if my mind is diverted to memories of those past witnessed events, I lose all interest in whatever I’m doing, turn pale, my stomach starts turning, and I need to sit down and do something to bring my mind back to reality and the current day.
Do I think BDSM is bad? Do I think poorly of men who engage in these activities? No! I truly believe that everyone can do and enjoy what they like, as long as the activities are consensual, safe sex is practiced, drugs aren’t involved, and that there is a complete discussion among all participants beforehand. Honestly, I think one of the best writers on the topic is John Pendal, Mr. International Leather 2003. Read his writings (click on the index page then “Harness” columns).
As for me? I’m into leather because I’m a Biker, I like it, it feels good, is durable, warm, comfortable, and looks good on me (or I feel that it does). Are the Leathercops going to confiscate my gear because I’m not into BDSM? Ha! I’d like to know who they are and for them to try. That could be fun!
I get home from work most days about a half-hour before my partner does. I go shed the work clothes and (especially in winter) put on the leather and tall boots. Some days I put food out for the birds and squirrels in the feeder in our back yard to save my partner the time, especially if it’s cold or wet, as it was yesterday.
So here I am, in Wesco Motor Patrol Boots which have Vibram 100R non-marring soles. But I forget that it’s wet and before I know it, dirt and leaves get into the sole treads (as shown.) ooops…. What’s worse, I don’t have a way to hose off the boot soles since our outside water faucets are turned off to prevent freezing. Without thinking (sometimes that’s my middle name), I walk into the house and start dinner preparations.
The dirt dries, falls out… ooops. Clods galore, wherever I have walked. My partner is none too happy about that, and makes pronouncements, “At this specific date and time, you will vacuum the basement stairs!” and continues to grumble. Well, he has a point. Perhaps if I feed the birds, I should go do that in my dress clothes with leather-soled boots so I won’t be as likely to pick up all the dirt in the soles of boots with big treads. Okay, BB, that’s my plan. Meanwhile, I’m sweeping, vacuuming… such is the life of a Bootman.
I’d like to thank an exceptionally intelligent friend and who has a superb grasp of the English language who shared his insights with me about my blog post about my interest in boots and leather being a fetish or not.
What he said, which is an accurate statement, is that my interest in boots and leather is an avocation, which is defined as, “An activity taken up in addition to one’s regular work or profession, usually for enjoyment; a hobby.”
That’s spot on: I get into my “boot and leather thing” by building my website, participating on-line, and communicating about boots and leather purely as a personal interest, beyond my profession. My profession is in an entirely different field, for which I have won international recognition.
Further, my astute friend pointed out that the term “fetish” is further defined as an irrational obsession. You can split hairs, but I know when to spend time with my interest in boots, and when to do other things. Boots don’t obsess me, though perhaps I do devote more time to this hobby than perhaps other things. But my interest isn’t irrational. For example, I wear the boots and leather I have regularly; not just “have it” to have it. I don’t go into debt about it; and I don’t toss aside responsibilities to my partner, my family, my friends, nor my community. Therefore, I don’t think my avocation represents being irrational.
My friend concluded by saying that most people are too lazy to look up a real meaning of a word, and use the word “fetish” with reckless abandon. He went on to say that some may label me with that word because they don’t bother to understand what it means. And that’s the trouble with many folks these days, they just repeat what they hear without really knowing the meaning of what they are saying.
I’d like to thank my smart, well educated friend for his enlightenment. I’m blessed to have people like him in my life, which make my life so much richer.
For the third time in as many days, I’ve had people write or comment on some things I have posted or written elsewhere on the Internet saying that I must have a “boot fetish” and/or a “leather fetish.”
According to Wikipedia, Fetishism means a sexual admiration of an inanimate object.
Well, I certainly like boots, and I enjoy my leather. Do I find boots and leather sexually attractive? No. Do I find a man wearing boots and leather sexually attractive? Maybe — it depends on the man wearing them. Sure, I may say that a guy who looks good in boots and leather is “hot,” but to me that’s just the same thing as a straight man saying that a bikini-clad woman is beautiful. Does the straight man in this example have a bikini fetish? No more so than I have a boot or leather fetish (in my own opinion.)
Do I find my partner sexually attractive? Always. And when he is in boots and leather, it just adds to the enjoyment of the experience. But he is attractive to me for his mind and his integrity, honesty, and thoughtfulness, much more so than what he wears (or doesn’t wear, as the case may be.)
Some insist that I must have a boot and leather fetish because I have “so much” of it (124 pairs of cowboy and motorcycle boots is a lot, I admit). But I really do wear them for the reasons they’re made: as footwear. Not sexual wear. As for leather? Yeah, again, I have a fair amount of leather garments, which I wear when I ride my motorcycle, for warmth, around the house, and also when I enjoy more intimate relationships with my partner. To me, it’s not that I am IN leather that gets me aroused. It’s just fun to have fun with my partner when we’re both in leather. I get well aroused with him without leather just as easily (and often.)
So I disagree with those who claim that I have a “boot fetish,” “leather fetish,” or whatever. I wear boots because they are practical for what I do and where I go, I like how they look, and I like how they feel. I wear leather for the same reasons, as well as for warmth and protection when I ride my motorcycle.
Also see my related follow-up blog post titled “An Avocation” for additional information.
Man, it’s warm today! It’s over 70F, and for mid-February in the DC area, that is very unusual. I had some chores to do around the house on this holiday, like try to fix a leaky faucet and some other things. I also was contacted by someone who is interested in looking at my Harley, which is up for sale as I’m lookin’ at a new one. I’ll ride my ol’ Dyna over to his place later and perhaps work out a deal.
I’ll miss the Low Rider. We’ve been all over the country together, two-up with my hunky partner. Sturgis South Dakota, McAlester Oklahoma, and many points in between. Not to mention the many miles I’ve ridden with my biker buds. Yeah, I’ll miss this great bike, but after 15 years, it is time to move on. I just hope the guy buys it — then I can get my new one. I promised my partner that I wouldn’t get a new bike until the old one was sold. Meanwhile, I’m going to go for a ride on this nice day, in boots and leather, of course!
Okay, after last night, I can validate that chocolate whipped cream is fun. Enough said; this is a G-rated blog. But man, the belated Valentine’s night with my partner was g-r-r-r-r-e-a-t!
Today is a day to catch up on stuff; corporate and association tax returns; and other stuff. Doin’ it in Naked Leather Jeans and Tall Wesco Harness Boots, typical weekend attire for me. Oh… why do they call it “Naked Leather”? Simply because the leather is not lined, so you feel the slightly rough cowhide on your own skin. A nice feeling!
Gotta get goin’ to what’s on my list, in leather and boots all the way.
At a local grocery store this morning, I was escorting my elderly aunt to the car with bagfuls of groceries when I was stopped by a old fart doing a petition drive for a referendum to put a question on our ballot in November to ask if a law that was passed by our county that prohibits discrimination against transgender people should be repealed. I have mentioned this in previous posts.
The misguided old man said, “you look like a real good son, and a good solid man in those boots. Do you want to allow men to use women’s bathrooms?”
I blew up. The law that was passed by our county (unanimously) simply says that transgender people should be included among the protected classes that are already included in our county’s civil rights laws. Existing law also says that operators of public facilities, such as gyms and spas, can designate who can use certain rooms such as restrooms that are purely personal and private. Therefore, this new law does not require operators of public facilities to permit men to use women’s bathrooms or vice-versa.
Thus, when this misguided old fart approached me complimented me on my boots, he was assuming that I would want to join their hateful, spiteful, narrow-minded misinformation campaign because, as he said, “you must be a real solid man.” He sure had another thing coming! I told him just what I thought of his mean-spirited campaign, especially that he is engaging in fear-mongering by taking advantage of seniors to spread misinformation.
I thought the old guy was going to have a cardiac arrest by the way he sputtered and fumed and carried on in response to what I said in a calm but factual voice. I’m so sorry for this man, and his few mean-spirited, misguided so-called friends whose humanity is only smaller than their narrow minds. Pictured here as well are the boots I had on today. I guess Justin Square-Toed Cowboy Boots look like a “solid man’s boots.”
There’s something special about the sound of that “clunk” when walking in a quality pair of cowboy boots. Today I put on my Lucchese Black Cherry Ostrich Boots to wear to work. While I don’t dress cowboy (jeans, flannel shirt, hat) at work, the boots look good with dress clothes and they make a great sound on the sidewalks and in the office as I move around. Always reminds this Bootman what’s on his feet! And these boots are darned comfortable, too. Lucchese Boots are known for comfort and these boots are no exception.
One reason why I have so many cowboy boots and motorcycle boots is to have a variety of choices to select from for boots to wear every day. I often change boots two or three times a day, or more frequently on weekends. Boots, to me, aren’t a “fetish” as they are practical, every-day wear. As I’ve often said, “life is short: wear your boots!” Enjoy this day, which is special ’cause you’re in it!
Today is a Happy Valentine’s Day. A very happy one indeed because I have the pleasure of sharing the 14th of February for the 14th Valentine’s Day we’ve been together with the man of my life, my love, my very own Valentine. This man means the world to me. His love, compassion, intelligence, romance … all are so very special. He has a great head for finance, is solid and strong, reliable, and caring. He has a gentle side which is quite adorable, especially as I see him care for me, his mother, and the creatures in our forest. My mere words on this little blog can not express how very much I love him with all of my heart and soul. BikerBeef, BuffTuff, or whatever he goes by on-line, is merely an expression, and I am so very fortunate to have the “real deal” each and every day as we enjoy our home, our families, and our lives together. What a treasure it is to have my very own Valentine’s Day, each day I get to look deep into my partner’s eyes and say, “I Love You A Whole Much!”