Somehow people think that after a gay man marries his mate-for-life that his life changes. I am here to disprove that notion — at least for me. Honestly, I am the same guy I was before with just a little added weight around the neck.

Let me explain.

First part — the added weight around the neck. My spouse and I got chains on which we placed our rings. That is how we wear our ring — on a chain around the neck. I tried, really tried, but I just can’t wear a ring on my ring finger (or any finger for that matter). Rings cause pain, soreness, and swelling. A ring is impossible to wear when I do manual labor, electrical repairs, or even when washing pots & pans or taking a shower. Nope, won’t work. The chain works best for both of us. So I can now refer to my spouse as “the old ring and chain.” (giggle.)

Now, back to my life.

I continue to see senior pals and help them out. Taking them grocery shopping, fighting with insurance companies and sleazy contractors, or taking walks with them. I computed 62 tax returns for my senior pals this year, too. Many smiles are abundant in our ever-deepening friendships, and headaches chased away with love.

My spouse and I continue to do work on our house. It is a labor of love. Powerwashing a deck, then sanding it in preparation for applying high quality, oil-based preservative stain, has been a major task of late. I also dethatched our front lawn using a manual dethatching rake. Hard work!

My spouse’s health remains moderately stable, so I have been able to go on a ride with fellow biker buds. You saw the photos on recent posts.

It was interesting that when I went to the dealership where I bought my motorcycle, I was greeted by a number of people who work there or were hanging out. Many greetings of “congratulations” were extended. Even from some of the more “hard core” bikers. My marriage to a man? No.Big.Deal.

I have to be truthful–I was a bit concerned as typical Harley-biker-types are not always known to be supportive of same-sex marriage. However, as I have said all along, these guys know me for who I am and what I bring to the success of our collaborations and mutual riding fun. What matters to them is that I can ride, I ride safely, and I know what I’m talking about. My sexual orientation is not discussed. Not because I am hiding it, but because it is irrelevant to what we are talking about — tire pressure and 20K service? Sure, let’s talk about derby covers and o-rings.

Not much else to say. My life is what it is and hasn’t changed. My spouse is my spouse, just like I have felt about him for many, many years. Nothing has changed in that regard. I still and always will love him as my one-and-only. Call him a spouse, partner, mate-for-life, or whatever.

Life is short: live life consistently.