He Completes Me

I attended the marriage ceremony of my kid-bro cousin on Saturday. A full, long concelebrated mass that I remember of that huge branch of my family tree for so many of my cousins’ Catholic weddings.

And man, was it a wedding-and-a-half. Much bigger than I expected for my no-frills cousin, but I’m sure his wife and her family had a lot to do with how big it became.

As I was listening to the priest when he was giving his homily about the importance of marriage, he said words that mean much to me about my marriage to my husband. He said,

Marriage makes you as one (in Christ). Your spouse completes you.

Regardless of my belief led (or not led) by organized religion, I truly believe that marriage indeed has made me as “one” with my spouse. He does indeed complete me.

My husband is always the first person I think of when I wake, as I go about my life each day, in my dreams, and in so many thousands of ways. How “we” think, how we carry out our daily activities, how we care for each other and those we love, how we share characteristics of honesty, integrity, and faith.

Yes, while I have had my differences with organized religion and with Catholicism in particular, I do have faith. I had full faith that my husband would recover from that awful illness that he suffered with for three long years. Advocacy, western and eastern medicine, positive thinking, and continuous persistence — not any deity, prayed-to “savior” or saint — made him better.

I had faith that our marriage would make us even closer. I have faith that as we go forward in our lives, we will continue to build our bonds of deep and abiding love.

From the Bible, 1 Corintians, Chapter 13 Verses 4 – 7:

Love is patient, love is kind. It is not jealous, it is not pompous, it is not inflated, it is not rude, it does not seek its own interests, it is not quick-tempered, it does not brood over injury, it does not rejoice over wrongdoing but rejoices with the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

Yes, I truly believe what this passage of the Bible says about love.

My love for my husband is deep and we remain extremely close in our bonds. Our marriage made us one in the eyes of the law and custom, but also — I really believe this — completed “us.”

My husband is away, caring for his ailing mother. I miss him tremendously. I am incomplete without him. But in my heart of hearts, his love for me and my love for him was made stronger through marriage. Yes, he completes me and I am truly blessed (religion or not)… the Supreme Spirit is in our faith. Our completeness is made whole by love — as well as recognition by a civil marriage.

Life is short: celebrate the one whose love makes you whole.