Here is an update since my spouse retired and I returned to full-time out-of-the-house work. Our lives have remained the same, but our routine has changed. How?

During the week, I rise at 4am and quietly slip out of bed, let myself out of our room, and go to our guest room where I dress for my morning exercise. I have learned how to do this so silently that I haven’t awakened the spouse in at least a week (giggle.)

I lace up my hiking boots, tip-toe out the front door, and begin a three or four-mile fast-paced walk, usually with a senior pal who walks with me. I don’t like to walk alone in the dark of night, and I know myself well enough that I could easily skip the exercise unless I knew someone else was planning on me joining her. It’s always good to have that motivation and not be “outdone” by a 78-year-old woman!

Upon return from my walk, I go to our basement where I shower in the bathroom furthest from our bedroom (to avoid noise waking the still-slumbering spouse), then I get dressed down there — but don’t pull my boots on yet.

I tip-toe to the kitchen and have a bite to eat for breakfast, then make my lunch which I take with me to work. THEN I pull on the boots I selected the night before and go into the garage to move my spouse’s car and my truck out — our 4-wheeled vehicles are parked in front of my Harley, so they have to be moved out so I can get my bike out. I pull on whatever motorcycle leathers I may need (depending on the temperature), then walk the bike down to the end of the drive.

I click the remote to close the garage doors and start my Harley, then ride to work. It takes about 20 minutes to get there, then 8 minutes to park, lock up my gear and the bike, and get through security and up to my office.

My spouse wakes up when he hears the garage doors open. Even though we have much quieter garage door openers, he cannot avoid hearing the doors open. He tells me, “that’s okay — time to get up!” Since he does not drive, he sticks around home all day. I see the results — the interior of almost every room in our house has been painted; decks have been stained; grounds are immaculate; the house is cleaner than it was on the day we moved into it.

Meanwhile, I am working and am very busy, especially since I was recently promoted and have more work to do. I enjoy it — makes my day fly by fast.

Fortunately, I get off work fairly early (on most days), so I am home by 3:30pm. I quickly change clothes to my after-work casual attire and a different pair of boots (naturally…). I relax with my spouse for about an hour hanging out in the yard or in the family room where we catch up on each other’s days. Then I prepare a home-cooked meal for the two of us.

After dinner, if I do not have a meeting to attend, my spouse and I go to our leisure room (sounds a bit more classy than ‘the basement’! LOL!). My spouse may watch TV and I may drift off… it depends… but usually we hang out for a few hours, then I am in bed by 8:30pm. My spouse says that he cannot go to sleep so early. Instead, he may watch another hour-long TV show, then come to bed. I always hear him and feel the bed move as he crawls in, but in my state, I snuggle close to him and quickly fall back asleep. My slumber induces his. Ahhh… peace.

We have tried different timing and schedules and activities, but this pattern seems to be the one that works best for both of us. We work to avoid disturbing the other when he is sleeping, but realize that will happen since our schedules are not identical, and do not have to be. (I bet, though, that our early rising time is probably not common for most people. Besides the military, who in his/her right mind gets up with a song on his lips at 4am???)

This routine seems to be working for both of us. As long as my out-of-the-house every weekday situation continues, this is likely our ongoing, predictable, comfortable, pattern. There is much to be said for the comfort one has in having a predictable routine.

Life is short: establish and follow a routine.