I have been confronted with a very difficult situation in my life, which could be, to some people, very upsetting when it comes to evaluating one’s self-worth and perception of same. Yeah, it’s that serious.
No, nothing is wrong with my health. My partner is fine. Our home is okay. My family is okay. I wasn’t fired. I did not lose an election (we did not have any elections yesterday where I live). Read between the lines to determine what else it could be.
I could respond to this situation in a negative manner. I could burn bridges and respond with a rather snarky tune. I could be hard on myself and play “shoulda, woulda, coulda.” I could lay blame and point fingers.
Instead, after several days of very careful introspection, discussion with my partner, and listening to advice from family and close friends who I trust and who care for me, I decided to take the high road. That is, I am going to work through this situation and work toward my future, and do it professionally, competently, and peacefully. The importance of listening to your heart in all the decisions you make is another facet of taking the high road. And it is my heart’s intent to consider this setback as a minor bump in the road rather than something worse (or permit it to become something worse by allowing it to consume me).
If anything I have learned, reacting with anger and emotion to an upsetting setback can create long-term consequences that can haunt someone for a lifetime. Internalizing misfortune can breed failure. That is, if one thinks he is a failure, then he will be one. If one imagines future success, then one is more likely to be successful. It is as simple as that.
I have begun to take specific steps and actions to respond deliberately and positively to what could be, if I let it, a horrible set-back. But I won’t let it. I won’t let “them” win. As my partner said, “you’re the winner so act like one.”
That’s who I am, and how I behave. It is hard. Believe me, it’s rough. I have not been sleeping well and I still have some difficult thoughts and emotions to deal with. But because of the net that surrounds me, I may fall but I won’t be broken. Not with the strength of the net who support me: my partner, my family, and my closest friends. I have reached out to that net, and they are there, holding me and my net firmly. I am so richly blessed, and sincerely appreciative.
Life events like this remind us not to settle in our work, relationships, and how we live. It’s when we settle for acceptable, mediocre, or worse — and not what our heart believes — that we may feel that life has served lemons.
Life is short: when you feel that life gives you lemons, make lemonade (sweetened with the love of those holding up your net!)
Words can not express my gratitude to those who hold my net and support me; in particular, to J, AZ, and K who helped me with this post.