{"id":370,"date":"2009-04-01T04:30:00","date_gmt":"2009-04-01T08:30:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.bootedmanblog.com\/?p=370"},"modified":"2019-04-10T07:19:14","modified_gmt":"2019-04-10T11:19:14","slug":"dress-wingtips-and-cocktail-attire","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.bootedmanblog.com\/?p=370","title":{"rendered":"Dress Wingtips and Cocktail Attire"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a>So, how do you like my new shoes? They are, according to the Esquire “Best Dressed Real Man” contest, the hottest thing for men this Spring.<\/p>\n

When I was asked to enter the contest from several people who are always in awe of my innate sense of fashion and style, I saw that these shoes were on the list of what was considered the ultimate<\/i> in men’s fashion, and I had to have them. Since money isn’t an object for the guppy set, I used my cell phone to call the valet to bring ’round my newly-leased Lexus LX09 Hybrid SUV and drove myself over to Neiman Marcus to get a pair. I mean heck, they were only $495 a pair<\/i>. I purchased a pair in black, too, since they were such a great buy. (You don’t just get<\/i> these shoes, you go through a purchasing experience<\/i> at their sales event<\/i>). And while I was there, I got fitted for three new suits and picked up a half-dozen new fine silk ties. My old suits and ties were getting a little tattered. I’ve been wearing them for a few months now. Time for Spring duds and also time to donate my hardly-used clothing to the Planet Aid<\/i> bin in the grocery store’s parking lot.<\/p>\n

And what a pleasant surprise! They gave me a set of men’s hair and skin products as a gift for buying the suits (wow, a $100 value!), consisting of green tea face wash (that’s the latest thing, fellas!), herbal skin softener, under-eye toner, and ginseng hair rinse. Oh, and bottle of ode-de-realman<\/i> cologne, too! Wow!<\/p>\n

In reviewing on-line articles about cocktail attire, where it says that “boots under trousers are an abomination,” I know a new suit, tie, and expensive dress wingtip shoes<\/i> will be the hit of the party at the latest gathering in Guppyville!<\/p>\n

After the great shopping experience, I dropped into a nearby Starbucks. I began Twittering on my laptop. While sipping a java chip frappacinno<\/i>, admiring the new shoes, I sat back and said…<\/p>\n

<\/span>\"\"<\/a>

OH MY GOD! WHAT A NIGHTMARE!<\/p>\n

April Fools!
<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

So, how do you like my new shoes? They are, according to the Esquire “Best Dressed Real Man” contest, the hottest thing for men this Spring. When I was asked to enter the contest from several people who are always … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-370","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-home-life"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bootedmanblog.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/370","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bootedmanblog.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bootedmanblog.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bootedmanblog.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bootedmanblog.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=370"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.bootedmanblog.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/370\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bootedmanblog.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=370"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bootedmanblog.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=370"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bootedmanblog.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=370"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}