{"id":342,"date":"2009-03-05T08:45:00","date_gmt":"2009-03-05T12:45:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.bootedmanblog.com\/?p=342"},"modified":"2016-05-11T15:27:57","modified_gmt":"2016-05-11T19:27:57","slug":"banish-ties","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.bootedmanblog.com\/?p=342","title":{"rendered":"Banish Ties!"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a>My partner said this morning as we were getting ready to go to work, “you look nice!” as he looked at me in a shirt and tie, dress slacks, and boots, of course. (I don’t own any shoes, nor will I.)<\/p>\n

I should be happy with receiving a compliment. He is always so supportive in so many ways.<\/p>\n

But I just h-a-t-e neckties. I really do. I always have. I don’t like how they look. I can’t stand how they feel. Even with a properly-fitted shirt, wearing a tie still makes me feel like I’m being bound. And I am definitely not into bondage whatsoever.<\/p>\n

My statement about feeling “bound” is a metaphor. Perhaps my feelings of revulsion toward neckties has more to do with how I rebel against conformity. I have strongly resisted being forced through society’s pressures to conform to a certain style of dress, manners of behavior, ways of being. I see a necktie more than anything else as a symbol of conforming to society’s old-fashioned pressures.<\/p>\n

Alas, I love my job. Part of keeping that job is having to go along with what the boss wants, and what the employer expects. After all, I was recently promoted to a fairly high level position. That promotion was based mostly on what I know and what I can do, but I know they wouldn’t have put me in that position if I did not conform to their expectations of dress when we meet with people from outside the organization, or our organization’s members.<\/p>\n

Thank goodness they don’t extend those expectations to footwear. Seriously, if somehow they insisted that I had to wear dress shoes, I probably would quit. But my boots are shined, look fine with pants over, and not a one of my co-workers or bosses have said anything about what’s on my feet.<\/p>\n

Yesterday when I facilitated a meeting with law enforcement leaders, I had to wear a shirt & tie. Fortunately, I could do the symbolic thing of wearing a jacket in the first moments of the meeting, then taking it off and placing it on the back of a chair. Most other men did the same, except for a few. There are always a few — like my twin brother — who wear a jacket and tie and say they like it. Poor fellas….<\/p>\n

As the meeting went on and I was becoming very “engaging” (or some say “hyperactive”) to maintain attention, the tie was loosened and the top button was undone. Again, this is acceptable during a meeting… to loosen up as it progresses, particularly if you’re running around as I do when I facilitate a meeting. (Some call me the equivalent of a game show host as active as I am during a meeting.)<\/p>\n

Today, I have a meeting at a federal agency, so once again, I had to put on a tie and have a jacket with me. I put the tie on at home, and wore it to work. But as I was catching up on my morning email, I just felt more and more confined, restrained, and restricted. My usual free-flow morning creativity was just gone. I had to finish writing a proposal, but my thoughts weren’t gelling. This was serious!<\/p>\n

So I reached up and yanked the tie off, and unbuttoned my collar. I stepped out to get some water and take a short walk around the office. When I returned ten minutes later, I was in a completely different state of mind. The rest of that proposal just flowed from my brain to the fingers on my keyboard. I think it’s a winner — and all because I took that damn tie off.<\/p>\n

I know, some of the readers of this blog (hey, Maf) think suits & boots are an enjoyable appearance. I’ve heard that from others. That’s fine, I am glad you enjoy it. I just don’t. I never have. Yuck. Just ask my twin brother: I got the “jeans” genes, and he got the “suit” genes.<\/p>\n

I know it’s all in my head. But that’s just how I am. Men’s neckties should be banished from the world. We all would be more comfortable, too.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

My partner said this morning as we were getting ready to go to work, “you look nice!” as he looked at me in a shirt and tie, dress slacks, and boots, of course. (I don’t own any shoes, nor will … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[31],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-342","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-job"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bootedmanblog.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/342","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bootedmanblog.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bootedmanblog.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bootedmanblog.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bootedmanblog.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=342"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.bootedmanblog.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/342\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bootedmanblog.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=342"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bootedmanblog.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=342"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bootedmanblog.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=342"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}