I most sincerely appreciate my twin brother’s “hijack” of my blog and his heartfelt greetings. I really wish I could have been at his villa in Rome to share our birthday, but that trip was not to be this year. <\/p>\n
I had a very quiet and subdued birthday at home with my spouse. We did not go anywhere or do anything special. He is still not feeling well and we just enjoyed each other’s company while I (tried) to avoid working.<\/p>\n
However, that afternoon…
\n
\n…his mother called. She was very upset and was crying hysterically. My spouse couldn’t get anywhere with her on the phone, so he asked me to pick up and try to find out what was going on.<\/p>\n
After she calmed down a bit, we discovered that she tried to use a credit card to pay for a prescription, but she has increasing dementia and could not understand what the small code number (CVV) was on the back of the card, couldn’t find it, and could not get the pharmacy clerk to accept just the card number and process the charge.<\/p>\n
What’s worse, my MIL has become so confused that she did not realize that the cost was only $4, and she could have paid that in cash at delivery.<\/p>\n
She ended up getting her credit card suspended by the bank because the transaction looked like fraud.<\/p>\n
So she calls and wails and wails, which further exacerbates my spouse’s tenuous health condition. She does not know that my spouse is sick. She would not understand. To her, the only person in the world with any problems is her. Unfortunately, any compassion she may have had is completely wiped out by dementia.<\/p>\n
We called the bank, who insisted on speaking with the MIL to get the card restored. However, they require knowing the CVV number to do that — and that was the problem in the first place. What’s worse, the caregiver who spends about 20 hours each week cleaning and feeding slop to the MIL is prohibited from conducting financial transactions or even handling a credit card on behalf of a client.<\/p>\n
Since the MIL is completely alone and has no friends nearby, and we are the closest family 200 miles away, the only thing I could think of was to hop in our Jeep and drive up there. <\/p>\n
This morning upon posting this blog, that is where I am — at the MIL’s house near Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. I asked a good friend who is a retired nurse to check in on my spouse while I am away. I spoke with him several times by phone and he is okay.<\/p>\n
I got the credit card situation resolved. I then began tackling the crap in her fridge and kitchen. Her daughter from Florida visited for three weeks in June, and left her with all sorts of foods that the MIL would eat when fed them by her daughter, but does not understand how to prepare by herself. Her caregiver is just as clueless.<\/p>\n
I spent hours cleaning out and discarding “science experiments” from the fridge, and generally restoring the kitchen to usefulness. I went to the grocery store and restocked the MIL’s fridge and pantry with foods that are marginally nutritional, but foods that she can prepare using a microwave or eat without preparation. Her caregiver can’t do more than boil water, so the foods I got would work for her to feed the MIL as well.<\/p>\n
This situation in this lonely, decrepit, run-down abandoned town is very sad. But the MIL absolutely will not move anywhere. There are no social programs that the MIL has not run off because she is suspicious of people and plain ol’ neurotic.<\/p>\n
This morning, though, I will put on my happy peppy smiley face, prepare pancakes for the MIL for breakfast, and begin my return trip home after Pittsburgh rush-hour abates.<\/p>\n
Not really what I was thinking of having to do on my “staycation,” but a guy does what a guy has to do.<\/p>\n
Life is short: show those who are hard to love that you love them anyway.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
I most sincerely appreciate my twin brother’s “hijack” of my blog and his heartfelt greetings. I really wish I could have been at his villa in Rome to share our birthday, but that trip was not to be this year. … Continue reading