About BHD

I am an average middle-aged biker who lives with his spouse in the greater suburban sprawl of the Maryland suburbs north and west of Washington, DC, USA.

My New Motorcycle

I wrote a post before to say that I sold my 2008 Harley-Davidson Road King. I was not riding it much last year while my husband was going through a hell of a journey with cancer. I did not want to have the risk of injuring myself while I was caring for him so intently, living our marriage vows every day.

I also suffer from a chronic intestinal disease that is damn fatiguing, especially as I get older. That big super-heavy bike exhausted me when I rode it for more than a few hours.

However….
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Tecovas Blew It

Readers of this blog and viewers of my website are probably aware that I became a fan of Tecovas boots. They emerged onto the “cowboy boot scene” in 2015. At first, they offered a limited lineup of men’s traditional western and roper boots. But by now — 2021 — it is my opinion that Tecovas is “too big for their britches.”

I had become more and more wary of the company as they expanded with more styles of boots, additional non-boot products (bags, jeans, belts, swag, and the overpriced boot jack), and began opening a number of brick-and-mortar stores in several U.S. southern states. I was getting concerned that this once small, well-targeted and focused company had been expanding beyond the core concept that I once admired.

However, as a result of a significant March 2021 marketing blunder, I no longer…
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Feeling the Love

A couple readers of my recent post describing what I am doing to keep busy and have a focus on a future… without… my beloved husband… noted that I did not say anything about my family or the support I am receiving.

Let me assure you…
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One Year Ago

One year ago this week, I brought my beloved husband back to my very favorite Caribbean island, Puerto Rico, to enjoy a 25th anniversary return to la isla del encanto. I had retired at the end of 2019, and Spouse and I planned lots of travel during 2020 with the new free time I was going to have.

Back in the 80s, 90s, and 2000s, I traveled a LOT to this island for…
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One Month On

Holding his hand

Today, February 5, it has been one month since my beloved husband let go on January 5th. I stayed the night with him the night before at the Hospice, holding his hand all.night.long. They kept telling me all day the 4th that “your husband is ‘close’ and not to expect him to live much longer.”

But as usual, my testadura — the ever stubborn — defied prognostications. He lived through the night, and died the next morning when I had to let go when the nurses needed to adjust him in his bed.

Today, one month on, how am I doing?
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Most Courageous Demonstration of Love

One month ago, Thursday, December 31, which is usually during non-pandemic times a festive party time, instead, I arrived at the hospital at 7am to be with my husband. He had been hospitalized since the Sunday before with a nasty internal bacterial infection. I finally broke through the “Covid no visitor” policy since my husband was close to death.

I found him in really bad shape, even worse than when I left him the night before. He was having a lot of trouble breathing and he had a nasogastric (NG) tube in his nose, down his throat.

Where did that come from? Why was that there? Thus began a terribly difficult and fateful day of decision-making.
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Credit to Differences

I have had several regular readers of this blog reach out to extend their condolences on the recent death of my beloved husband. I appreciate that.

Some people also offered information on how they handled similar situations when their husband or long-time partner died.

Concerns described to me about “trigger points” for grief made me realize just how I am benefiting, oddly, by…
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