I find myself here in paradise… working hard during the day (yeah, really) yet being rather bored and lonely after the work day is done.
My hotel is not on a beach, but a beach is not far away. However, …
…the only other in the world with whom I would want to have a walk on a beach … is not here.
There are touristy tours that I could do … but the only other in the world with whom I would want to enjoy these activities … is not here.
A colleague offered to loan me his Harley to ride. Admittedly, I was tempted, but with no one to enjoy seeing sights and the ride not being here with me, I declined. (Plus, the traffic is really really really awful!)
I speak with my spouse each day. I listen to his voice and enjoy our conversations. 4am my time can’t come early enough. We talk about anything and everything; how the seedlings we planted are growing, how he is enjoying the meals that I prepared for him before I left, and what’s in the mail. What I see and how disgusted I am with all the flip-flops, what I am doing to make the world just a little safer, and how productive I am feeling in my work.
But at the 4pm end of my work day, he is not here.
I take a lonely walk, have a snack for dinner, and return to my hotel early for an early-early bedtime.
I reach across the bed… he is not here.
I close my eyes … he is HERE again… in my dreams.
When I awake, I realize that I was dreaming once again. I also realize just “how married” I really am. I so love my spouse that being somewhere without him makes a guy very very lonely.
Life is short: love those you miss.