It Gets Better

A friend of mine with whom I attended school since we were in first grade posted a message on Facebook the other day, indicating how miserable she felt in high school. She’s lesbian — and I didn’t know it until later in life when we found each other again through Facebook.

She described how left out and unhappy she felt during high school. Funny, I didn’t remember that. She was the star of our high school plays. I thought she was well-liked and admired.

I remember feeling kinda badly during school, too … but not because I was gay; I didn’t know I was gay then. I just didn’t really know much about my sexual orientation. I do remember, though, being picked on by bullies and called “fag” and “queer” among other names. If I didn’t have my taller twin defending me all the time, I probably would have been dead meat.

Overall, I had a miserable junior high experience (age 12 – 14), as my father died when I was 12 and I went through puberty late. I was a meek weakling ripe for school bullies to toy with. By high school, I had become more confident and secure, mostly due to teachers who treated me with respect, by becoming involved in activities in which I assumed leadership positions, and also by serving as my brother-the-jock’s strongest cheering section.

Anyway, I’m here to say that as you get older, it does get better. It really does. You come to terms with yourself, and with others around you. Your family deals with it too, and most families, like mine, accept. I’m very happy that my family has long since moved beyond mere “acceptance” to having me feel embraced, always loved….

The following video shows two young men describing how bad the felt during high school and during their coming out process. It’s interesting to watch. Please view it. It provides assurance that I can attest to as well: it does get better.