Hi, folks. Booted Harleydude, or “BHD”, here. This is an alter-ego for a guy who lives with his
partner spouse in the Maryland suburbs of Washington, DC.
Of course, regular readers of this blog know that. The reason for this posting is that lately, several people from various places have entered, “Who is Booted Harleydude?” into search engines, and have landed on various places — my website and this blog. I’m not sure why the sudden interest in who I am from people in Minot, North Dakota USA; Barcelona, Spain; and Jakarta, Indonesia. Nonetheless, I thought a blog post asking the very question being looked up might consolidate the links to that question in future search engine results.
So, who am I? Sometimes, I’m not sure. Seriously. I am a complex man. I have a variety of interests and disinterests. For example, I like to wear boots but can’t stand shoes or sneakers — especially on a motorcycle. I enjoy wearing leather garments (pants, shirts, vests, jackets, and boots) often (though not in the heat of summer!) I don’t give a rat’s ass about the court of public opinion. If I wear leather, so be it. Honestly, once you grow up, you realize that nobody cares and you can be your own man by dressing yourself in what you like, what feels good, and what ‘works’ for your personality and style.
I love to ride my Harley, but not for long distances. I get too tired due to a chronic health condition that saps energy much more quickly than the average bear. I have been riding a motorcycle for over 35 years on a regular basis. In the past, I have ridden across the USA several times, and I also have rented bikes in exotic places and have ridden in some beautiful country (in several countries!) But for the most part, my “adventure biker travels” are history.
Bear? I really don’t like classifications like that in the gay community. I do not identify with any particular gay subculture — bear, biker, cowboy, leatherman, etc. I am all of those to one degree or another. But I guess I can say that I’m not a twink, fashion queen, or guppie. I like leather, but am rather vanilla about it (that is, I don’t engage in BDSM.) I’m a masculine man — not “straight-acting” but just a guy who likes (most) guy-things and remains in love with one special guy.
Yeah, I’m gay. So what? Lots of other people are, too. I do not identify myself in particular as gay. It’s just how my DNA worked out. I was very fortunate to meet and fall in love with one special man. I keep my pants zipped up when in the presence of others. Period. Honestly, I don’t fool around with other men. (Frankly, at my age, the amount of “fooling around” I do is limited, anyway, since I don’t use any form of drug to “enhance performance” [LOL!])
I work for a living, full-time in a respectable profession. While I like to wear cop boots, breeches, and cop-style leather jackets, I am not a cop. Though some fetish-wear that I have makes me appear like a cop sometimes, I don’t pretend to be one, especially in public.
I am considered an international leader in a small niche of my profession, and speak at conferences and teach courses about what I do. My work currently occupies a great deal of my time, but only for the work day. At the end of the day, I turn it all off and concentrate on other things.
This introduces another quirk of my complex personality. I do not have a smartphone; I don’t text, nor receive text messages. I do not live, eat, and breathe for the latest news or email or messages on an iPhone, Blackberry, Android, or whatever. I don’t need it. I am very fortunate to have achieved a level in my profession where I don’t have to run when the bell rings, so I do not need to have some gadget to keep me tethered to the office on a 24/7 schedule. (I used to be in that position, but younger guys, eager to pay their dues as I did, are doing that kind of work. More power to ’em!)
I have various hobbies besides motorcycling and keeping my website up-to-date. I also serve as a webmaster for four others (individuals and organizations.) I enjoy doing carpentry, electrical, and (some) landscaping work. I hate painting and plumbing isn’t my forte. I love to walk, but can’t stand gyms. Generally, I don’t follow or care for sports of any sort, and don’t play. I love to cook, and designed the kitchen in the house where we live now to accommodate my every desire. Often you’ll find me cooking away, singing, and puttering around my kitchen. (That explains why my spouse
partner and I don’t eat out at all — no need to pay for restaurant meals when I can prepare what we like at home!)
Another hobby is genealogy. I keep my father’s family tree. It’s huge. What with 21 aunts and uncles who each had numerous offspring, keeping that thing up-to-date is a frequent challenge. I have to admit, thanks to Facebook, I become more aware of when the latest addition to the family comes along — much sooner than traditional methods such as email and phone (what’s that???)
A little-known fact: I have developed some hybrids of roses that I grow at home. I learned this from my Mom who was quite the rosarian.
I have lived, worked, and traveled in 64 countries of the world. I attended college for a year in Italy. I spent significant time in Romania after the fall of its former dictator in 1989. I also spent significant time in Australia, New Zealand, and Switzerland. I speak four languages fluently, and bits and pieces of about a dozen others. But again, my days of world travel are pretty much history (at least for now.)
I have lived part of my life in rural Oklahoma, USA, and most of my life in the Maryland suburbs of Washington, DC. While I love my family in Oklahoma and enjoyed the time I spent on the family horse ranch, I can’t say that I would choose to live in a small town where everybody knows everyone else’s business and it’s 50 miles to any major grocery store (other than Wal-sucks, which I won’t go to). While I identify DC as my “hometown,” I really don’t like going into the city and avoid it. I am not an urban guy; rather, I am truly a cul-de-sac-living suburbanite. That also explains why I avoid going to New York City, too. Haven’t been there since 2002 and have no plans to return.
This leads to another facet of my personality — I am quite the early-bird, rising at 4am every day, seven days a week. I collapse to sleep no later than 9pm, often earlier. Been that way almost my whole life. As a result, I don’t like to go out for “nightlife” as I simply can’t remain awake for it — especially in gay venues that don’t get going until after 11pm or later. I can’t handle that.
I truly identify with my Maryland home as “my life.” My spouse
partner and I built a house here. I also own several other properties that I rent to make available as affordable housing for employees of our county who need to live where they work, but can’t afford it.
I have a large band of “senior pals” who live near me and who I care for in various ways. I serve the roles of handyman, transportation-provider, listener, and card-sender on a frequent basis.
I have and believe in the values of honesty, integrity, and personal financial stability. I don’t carry balances on credit cards, or take out loans. My spouse
partner is the same way. We pay for what we want, and if we don’t have the money, we don’t buy it. We talk about our joint finances often, and we establish and keep to a budget. We do not subscribe to services that result in ongoing monthly charges for frivolity (that is, movie channels on cable, Netflix, or data packages for wireless devices.) I know being financially stable and living on a budget is not easy for some people, but I live among many who buy to excess and mortgage themselves into upside down situations and often end up paying the consequences. Call us “cheap” but also call us “frugal.” We don’t spend what we don’t have, and don’t get ourselves into situations where the income is less than the outgo. Ever.
I dunno… there’s always more. Suffice it to say that I’m just a guy who works for a living, loves his spouse
partner, cares for his friends, contributes to society, and is financially stable. Oh yeah, I wear boots as my regular footwear and leather garments regularly… and ride a Harley. Thus, “Booted Harleydude.” Simple, eh?
So what’s my name? As I said, “BHD” will do fine. Yeah, that’s not the same name as found on my birth certificate, but the birth name is so widespread in my profession, that I don’t want this alter ego and that name to be co-mingled as the internet is wont to do.
Thanks for your interest!
PS: this page was updated to reflect that I married the love of my life in April, 2013. I call him my spouse.
Life is short: know yourself.